A very difficult truth to accept: all relationships, at some point, come to an end. Whether due to separation or death of one of the parties, facing the end of a love relationship is a complex and painful process. Breaking up a relationship that you thought would last forever, or at least for a long time, means saying goodbye to an important part of your life, shared dreams and a daily life that no longer exists.
Leaving life behind as you knew it, reinventing yourself, rising from the ashes and rebuilding yourself is an art that requires strength, patience and, above all, the right guidance. In this article, we will accompany you in this process by providing you psychological guidelines that will help you cope with the breakup of your relationship and start a new path towards healing and well-being.
How to get over the end of a relationship: first steps
It is common to feel lost and confused when ending a relationship. Advice and opinions from loved ones telling you what to do can be overwhelming, even when they do so with the best of intentions. However, it is important to remember that each experience is unique and there is no magic solution to deal with these situations.
The first step to overcoming this difficult process is to accept reality. Believe us! Rejecting what happened will only prolong the suffering and complicate recovery. For this to happen, it is essential that you allow yourself to feel all the emotions that arise, whether they are sadness, anger, frustration or even relief. Don’t try to repress them or criticize yourself for experiencing them.
Although the temptation to cling to normality may be strong, it is important not to resist change. The breakup of a couple implies a transformation in life, so it is essential to adapt Don’t cling to the past or try to revive what is no longer there. Instead, focus on the present and building a new, positive future.
Out there you will find multiple opinions, so it is vital that you can tune in to your own feelings. No one understands the circumstances you are going through better than you. Reserve time to meditate on your emotions and requirements. Practice activities that foster your connection with you and add them to your agenda to give them the importance they deserve.
And please respect your own times! If you go at a pace that does not correspond to you, you would be disrespecting your being and your feelings. Don’t forget that each individual faces the grieving process in a unique way, so allow yourself to experience what is necessary and move forward at your own pace.
In the next section, we will share with you some specific guidelines that will help you navigate the end of a relationship in a healthy and constructive way.
There is no identical manual for breakups: each one has its own nature. However, we can share with you some essential steps that will make your recovery process from the end of that love relationship easier.
1. Focus on your well-being
At this time, it is essential that you put your healing as a priority. Avoid seeking revenge, blame or reasons to explain the end of the relationship. Allow yourself to experience your emotions without criticism and focus on taking care of your mental and physical health. Spend time doing activities that make you feel good and that promote reunion with yourself.
2. Set boundaries with your ex-partner
Although zero contact may not always be a viable or necessary option, it is important to establish clear boundaries in communication with your ex-partner. Define what type of interaction is acceptable to you, what is the healthy frequency (if you have to maintain such contact) and establish the topics you prefer to avoid. Remember that you have control over who and how you decide to communicate.
3. Practice compassion with yourself
It’s completely normal to experience a wide variety of emotions during the grieving process: sadness, anger, confusion, homesickness, and even relief. Don’t judge yourself by what you feel. Accept each emotion without repressing it and allow yourself to process them at your own pace.
4. Maintain a routine
Despite the changes that separation brings, maintaining a routine can give you stability and a sense of control in your life. Establish fixed times to rest, eat, exercise and enjoy activities that you like. The organization provided by a routine can be of great help during this period.
Surrounding yourself with people who love you and support you is essential. Share your emotions with them, listen to their advice and allow them to give you the affection and understanding you need right now. Having the company of your loved ones can be a valuable refuge from loneliness and sadness.
6. Seek the help of a professional
A psychologist or therapist can assist you in understanding your feelings, developing coping strategies, and guiding you through the recovery process. Don’t hesitate to seek professional help if you feel you need it.
7. Look ahead
Even if you feel pain, anger or frustration, keep in mind that this situation is temporary. Over time, the wound will heal and you will regain the ability to feel love and joy. Focus your efforts on your goals and aspirations for the future.
Keep in mind that each individual is unique and there is no single route to overcoming the end of a relationship. The essential thing is that you discover what works for you and what you need to recover in a healthy and constructive way. With understanding, acceptance and the necessary support you can get ahead!
