Self-compassion: What It Is, What Benefits It Brings, And How To Enhance It
Because we are human beings, we have the privilege of going through many happy and very exciting situations, but also sad situations; This turns out to be part of life. What is key is how we react to it.
Some people, when they have these feelings of sadness due to some inadequacy, inability or failure that they may have had or experienced, tend to treat themselves poorly internally, either because of their feelings or because of the behaviors they may have. Others, on the contrary, tend to be understanding with themselves in this situation, avoiding this treatment and, on the contrary, tend to encourage or understand each other in order to overcome the situation. In this sense, throughout this article we will tell you What is self-compassion and how to promote it
We are clear that compassion is the feeling of sadness or discomfort that a person can feel when seeing that a third party is suffering or suffering; This drives the first person to alleviate, remedy or avoid this pain that the other suffers. So, consequently we would understand that self-compassion has to do with the process by which the person achieves feel sorry for yourself in an unfavorable case you have had ; These contexts may include failure, insufficiency, or general suffering.
In other words, self-compassion is the self-directed compassion that a person can have, it involves being understanding and warm with oneself** reducing levels of self-criticism** when the person has failed or felt incompetent.
Self-compassionate people are aware of their personal well-being, they are empathetic and sensitive to the discomfort of others, being able to be tolerant of discomfort without being self-critical, understanding the origins of discomfort and treating themselves warmly.
Beginnings of self-compassion in contemporary Psychology
Self-compassion has its beginnings or principles in Buddhist psychology, since it has been studied and practiced for more than 2600 years. Recently, contemporary psychology has expressed an interest in including it in the research and clinical field.
One of the first inclusions of self-compassion in the West occurred in the work of Sharon Salzberg in 1995, who emphasized it as one of the central elements in mindfulness. Kristin Neff is one of the leading researchers on self-compassion.
In the West, this theme has been developed considering the elements of different Buddhist teachers who have incorporated their practice in the West.
Components of self-compassion
For Kristin Neff, self-compassion has 3 components which are interrelated and can be trained to be able to cope with unfavorable situations such as situations of emotional pain.
1. Self-kindness
This first component has to do with the person treat yourself with care and understanding
2. Shared humanity (Common humanity)
The process of recognizing shared humanity is about the recognition that others go through suffering that is similar to one’s own that our problems are not punishments that have been imposed solely on us, and that in the same way that we would help someone else, we deserve to be helped, and vice versa.
3. Full attention (Mindfulness)
The process of mindfulness has to do with the ability to notice, pay attention and acceptance of what is happening in the present
How could we encourage self-compassion?
Now that we know the key concepts of self-compassion, let’s see how we could encourage it and put it into practice with ourselves to improve our physical and mental health.
1. Spend time with yourself
It is important to dedicate a prudent time where we can find ourselves, this way we can concentrate on what we are feeling or thinking. In order to carry it out It is necessary to put aside all those technological devices that distract us with a constant bombardment of stimuli, an action that will not allow us to concentrate on this activity; Likewise, it is necessary to find a suitable space where it is easier for us to have this activity.
Reforming our way of seeing things will allow us to have a new point of view on a problem or situation. We all make mistakes throughout our lives, so you don’t have to be so hard on yourself. Promote objectivity in your way of thinking and seeing things, accompany yourself by nourishing yourself with the opinions and points of view of others to compare our ways of seeing things just as you would do for a friend or family member or loved one when they are having a bad day or when things are not going well.
3. Leave the drama
It is essential to put aside the dramas that we can do when going through an unfavorable situation; We must remember that self-compassion has to do with acceptance of what has happened and the emotions we have at that moment, without falling into “black or white” interpretations based on binary bias.
4. Responsibility put into practice
At the moment of learning our mistakes and assuming the commitment to take charge of them, Our resilience capacity increases in the face of unfavorable situations that may occur again It is important to remember that self-compassion also becomes part of the processes of personal improvement and improvement, so responsibility for oneself turns out to be the key.
5. Think hopefully and positively
Thinking favorably and with hope turns out to be vital to continue living in good spirits Likewise, it turns out to be important to foster self-compassion in ourselves.
6. Connect with nature
It is highly recommended and even therapeutic to spend time with ourselves and nature itself, leaving aside everything that may distract us from being able to carry out this activity; natural environments They allow us to stop being exposed to reminders of everything that worries us and it makes us feel bad because we link it to our obligations, the actions we perform and they make us feel guilty, etc.
Related article: “The 10 differences between self-pity and victimhood”
The main benefits of self-compassion
Having reached this subsection, it is necessary to ask ourselves the following questions: What would be the benefits that we could have if we are self-compassionate with ourselves? What would this skill be used for in the development of our emotional intelligence? We will answer these questions by explaining the benefits that the practice of self-compassion could bring.
1. Promotion and reinforcement of intrapersonal and interpersonal relationships
Through the practice of self-compassion we can foster and strengthen our intrapersonal and interpersonal relationships. A person or individual who exhibits self-pity for oneself possibly will present a higher level of self-compassion for another person and for themselves
2. Promotion of patience and tolerance
Self-compassion gives us adequate levels of patience and tolerance with ourselves. We live in an era where society sometimes excessively demands from us competition and rapid development of various knowledge and skills, this sometimes it makes us lose our cool However, it is necessary to remember that all people are not equal and that we can advance at our own pace.
3. Inner joy in times of difficulty
A person can modify the way a reality is presented to them through their attitude Self-compassion can help us think more favorably in an unfavorable situation. Well, even though something negative may happen to us, we must prioritize the various opportunities we may have to try one activity or another again, or give our attention to the good things we have in life, among other things.
4. Introspective process:
Self-compassion also allows us strengthen and improve the level of self-knowledge we have Which will help us be more reflective with ourselves and others.
Psychological intervention applied to self-compassion
Self-compassion has proven over time to be linked to our psychological health. Various therapeutic interventions have been implemented that seek to increase or enhance self-compassion. Mainly, these programs were implemented in patients with a high tendency to self-criticism and also in people who do not necessarily present a clinical condition. Next, we will explain two therapeutic training programs to improve self-compassion.
Compassion Focused Therapy
Compassion Focused Therapy is a favorable psychotherapeutic process for the treatment of high levels of self-criticism and shame qualities that are at the basis of various psychological difficulties.
Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Program
The Mindfulness and Self-Compassion program turns out to be a psychotherapeutic process consisting of 8 weeks of treatment, presents a clarified design to cultivate Mindfulness and self-compassion skills applied to daily life. This will allow difficult emotions to be adequately managed, which will provide greater psychological well-being.
