Self-esteem In Children And Young People: How Can Self-esteem Be Developed In The Childhood And Youth Stage?
How to develop self-esteem from childhood? How to love each other since we are children? Discover tips to love yourself.
Today we are going to talk about developing the self-esteem since childhood, to do this, first we are going to explain what self-esteem in girls and boys boys and girls, or, in adolescent or young men and women.
First of all, we are going to try to define and explain what and is self-esteem with its dimensions and the influence of developing compassion towards oneself, important concepts for any person.
The self-esteem It is the assessment you make of yourself as a person for whom you love yourself, or that positive attitude towards oneself, which consists of conducting ourselves in the healthiest, happiest and most self-satisfying way that we can, taking into account tells the present and the future.
That’s why, the self-esteem it implies know ourselves, being aware of our limits and mistakes, of our qualities and positive aspects. It also implies accept ourselves unconditionallyregardless of our limitations and our achievements, and the external acceptance or rejection of people around us. Consider us positively, maintaining an attitude of respect and appreciation towards ourselves, even if we sometimes deviate from our objectives or ideals, we will not feel guilty about it, because we all have limitations and are fallible. Furthermore, it implies both attend to and care for our psychological and physical needs how to have a view of the self as potentialconsidering that we are more than the set of behaviors and traits that we have, having the option of learning to direct those changes in a desirable direction.
For all this, concepts such as self image, selfconcept and self-acceptance along with generating self-compassionate behavior, are complementary to each other and, depending on the level that each person has, they enrich and strengthen, or impoverish and weaken, the self-esteem that we possess. We remember that there are other factors that influence, such as the level of assertiveness that each individual has or the empathy that we develop throughout life.
What other factors are important in our self-esteem?
As we have mentioned, there are factors that are related to self-esteem and can weaken or strengthen it. These factors are:
Image or mental representation that one obtains or has of oneself.
Selfconcept
The opinion, concept, or impression that people have of themselves; It is the set of cognitive perceptions and attitudes that people have about themselves.
Self-acceptance
Attitude that oneself, or the same person, has when accepting their defects and virtues in a coherent manner, without judgments or reproaches.
Empathy
Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes, “putting yourself in the other person’s shoes.” Ability to understand the other person from their point of view and their frame of reference.
Assertiveness
“Ability to self-affirm one’s own rights, without allowing oneself to be manipulated or manipulating others” (Castanyer, 1997)
Is our self-esteem always stable?
From childhood to youth and from early adulthood to the end of life, our self-esteem fluctuates throughout the life cycle. The ideal is that from childhood we build our self-esteem. Yes, we create self-esteem between the first and third year of life, in a healthy way. Then it strengthens as the years go by, until we reach those 7 or 8 years, years in which the concept we have of ourselves comes to the fore; We begin to clarify and consolidate our self-concept in a global way compared to previous years, then it is an opportunity for our image, acceptance and self-esteem to be strengthened or broken, with the consequences that this entails, depending on what we have experienced up to those years.
The years go by and we reach puberty and adolescence, a key and complex stage, since, on the one hand, it is a stage to form both our own identity and to begin to socialize more, a key influence in this life stage with our peers.
The self-esteem and the ability to be sociable are not incompatible, rather they are complementary. That is why it is important that preteens, as well as adolescents, are developing good and healthy self-esteem since these are vital times where your privacy is going to be important, as is having a good image of themselves And self-esteem will continue to strengthen, as long as there are no situations where our self-esteem is put at risk, such as situations of rejection by certain peers towards another person of the same age.
This is how we continue throughout the life cycle, strengthening and building our self-esteem based on the fluctuations that are generated, reaching adulthood to continue shaping our self-esteem as we experience situations that we face in our daily lives.
Therefore, if we have a low self-esteem which is often accompanied by a high level of anxiety, I recommend the following:
Know yourself: To have a healthy self-esteem It is desirable, and convenient, to know our weaknesses, our weak points, and also what we are good at, our strong points, our virtues and strengths, our skills.
Be compassionate towards yourself and others: Compassion is a feeling and attitude to cultivate; compassion understood as the feeling of sadness that you see when someone suffers, and that drives you to alleviate their pain or suffering, to remedy it or to avoid it. We don’t talk about pity. We talk about alleviating your pain, your suffering or remedying it through kindness, kindness towards yourself, avoiding harsh and self-critical dialogue, and recognizing yourself as human when you fail, accepting that pain is inherent to the experience of every human being. Ultimately, be self-compassionate with yourself.
Practice mindfulness: Cheer up and commit to your self-esteem, practicing full attention or mindfulness formally or informally. Find out where they have classes outdoors or in centers where this practice is carried out, and your self-esteem will be reinforced by perceiving your current situation with kindness, accepting it as it is, without minimizing or magnifying it.
Do activities that you really like: We are not talking about doing any type of activity because others do them. Do an activity that you really like and that fulfills you, brings you well-being, whether it is dancing, martial arts or some craft activity. Your self-esteem will thank you, you will feel better about yourself in the medium and long term.
Help in your community: Do activities that have meaning for you, that contribute something to your community. Yes, sometimes it is difficult to ignore your peers, and it is difficult to alter the activities you do with them. Try to contribute your grain of sand to your community, for example by volunteering or boy-scout activities.
Spend quality time to your friends, to your peers and also to your family: Stay with those friends or peers who nourish you as a person, who make it easier for you to be yourself and who also dedicate quality time to you. More than quantity, it is the quality of these meetings and encounters that will benefit you and your self-esteem. Additionally, make time to go to family gatherings and pay attention to them. Instead of comparing yourself to others, at these ages it is more difficult to do this: try to admire those peers who stand out in things that you would also like to be recognized and look for a way to develop those desired qualities.
Do physical exercise, and alternate your obligations at home with your spaces for enjoyment and free time. Physical exercise will help you look good, it will increase your self-image and self-concept and, therefore, your self-esteem will be reinforced. Relaxing moments will help you be calm with yourself and carrying out obligations and activities in your free time will allow you to know yourself better, know what you enjoy and will also help improve your level of self-esteem.
Seek professional help: If you have tried everything you can do on your own and, despite this, you do not feel good about yourself and your self-esteem remains resentful, Don’t hesitate to seek help from a psychology professional He will facilitate and accompany you in the process so that you bring out your best qualities and love yourself in a healthier way. Sometimes out of shame and what others will say, both in the family and among our peers, we become self-conscious and do not ask for help. And it is understandable. Although asking a psychology professional for help, communicating it to your family and your peers when you think appropriate, can help them be understanding and respect your needs and desires.
Finally, we remember that, since each person can strengthen our self-esteem on our own and with our resources, it is often preferable to go to a psychology professional to face those self-esteem and anxiety problems or difficulties that we have. A professional will be willing to address the problem you present by providing you with the necessary tools to maintain or enhance your self-esteem and to reduce your anxiety levels to live a more satisfactory life with yourself.
