Swingers: What They Are And What Their Way Of Living Sexuality Is Based On
Sexuality is an aspect of our lives that throughout history has received variable treatment depending on the time and the prevailing currents of thought. Multiple sexual practices have been prohibited and censored, and even female desire and pleasure have been undervalued and forgotten for centuries. The same has happened in all sexual orientations other than heterosexuality, which have even been persecuted.
Fortunately, we currently live in a stage in which at least in one part of the world there is a high level of sexual freedom, with different ways of enjoying our sensuality and sexuality being born and reproduced. One of these practices is still somewhat controversial for part of the population today, as it differs from the concept of fidelity that is associated with the world of couples. Its about partner exchange or swinging and those who practice it, the swingers
Swingers are those people who maintain a stable relationship and have consensual sexual relations between both members of the couple with other couples.
Thus, each of the members of a couple maintains relations with one of the members of another while the other two do the same These sexual acts are always carried out in the presence and with the participation at the same time and place of all the members of each couple, being involved at all times in a more active or passive way in the sexual encounter.
It is remarkable that these are stable couples who decide to have sexual relations with other people in an agreed and joint manner, there being no deception and it must be something desired by both parties. Likewise, the couple with whom the so-called couple exchange takes place is decided and agreed upon jointly, not imposing the choice of one over the other. There is loving exclusivity, but not sexual one.
Partner exchanges can be carried out in clubs created for this purpose, at private events, in an agreement between individuals or even through applications designed for this purpose. It is relevant to keep in mind that couple exchanges do not necessarily require penetration vaginal or anal, and may be limited to looking or touching (the so-called soft swap) or oral sex. In addition to this, there can also be full sexual relations (full swap).
The range and type of acts that will be permitted or accepted must be agreed upon in advance. In some cases one member of each pair copulates while the other two watch. The couples who carry it out are usually heterosexual, although it is not uncommon for contacts to occur between people of the same sex even if they are not homosexual.
We are not facing a particularly frequent type of practice, being something that today is not totally welcomed by society. Regardless of this, it is important to keep in mind that these practices are carried out at all times with respect, swingers being people who have decided to enjoy their sexuality in this way freely and respecting the values and norms that they decide with their partners
The origins of couple swapping
Historically, there are certain doubts about the origin of the practice of swinging. Apparently one of the most accepted hypotheses is that Its origin dates back to a period of time between the 1940s and the 1960s in United States.
The origins would go back to military groups stationed in the Philippines, which in Some clubs carried out what was called “wife swapping” at the time: They met and after each of them put the keys to their rooms in a hat, they took other keys corresponding to another room from said hat, exchanging them with the partner of the original owner of the keys. This type of practice became popular in the hippie era, although it continued to be little accepted by the majority of the population.
With the passage of time, this practice, which was initially associated with a submissive role for women and in many cases also with express submission, has been modified until it has become a practice in which couples decide in an agreed and mutually consenting manner to maintain sexual relations with other people at the same time and in the same place.
Basic rules
The practice of swinging It is a complex and socially criticized phenomenon, something that causes swinger couples to tend to hide their practices. Likewise, it is necessary to take into account the need to establish a series of rules in these practices so that conflicts do not occur within the couple. Although each couple will establish their own rules, for the most part they follow a series of basic principles.
1. Agreed situation and without putting pressure on any of the parties
The main and most important premise that every couple exchange must follow is the fact that both members of the couple must be interested and agree to carry out this type of practice. That is to say, it is essential that neither party accepts something that they really do not want to do just to please their partner or for fear of breaking it.
Likewise, this also applies to acceptance or rejection by the person or partner with whom the couple wishes to maintain a sexual relationship.
2. Safety first
Another basic element is the use of prophylaxis: sexual practice with different partners can carry a high risk of contracting sexual infections or pregnancies if it is not done with protection. The use of condoms and other protective mechanisms can reduce this risk.
3. No emotional involvement
One of the most basic premises that means that the swinger movement may not have negative repercussions on the couple is the fact of keeping the act of exchange something purely sexual. We are talking about those who carry it out must be established and stable couples, who must be monogamous on a relational or romantic level. This aspect is especially relevant to avoid damaging the couple.
Words of affection, tenderness, romantic gifts are out of place. Even many couples kissing is prohibited, given the romantic connotation What this act usually has for most people.
4. It does not have to be the only sexual practice
Swinging can be a stimulating practice for people who practice it, but it is highly recommended that it is not the only one that is carried out. Maintaining sexual relations with your partner in other contexts and without exchanges is also necessary and healthy in order to maintain the couple.
Possible benefits and risks
If it is carried out under a series of basic rules and in a manner that is totally accepted and voluntary by both parties, the interviews carried out seem to indicate that swinging does not have to have negative effects on the functioning of the couple and can even revitalize in some cases. the eroticism and attraction that exists between its components when seeing it enjoyed in other ways. Likewise, the idea of sharing this type of activity as something secret between both members of the couple may be desirable.
The practice of swinging also has a series of risks, especially if the basic premises described above are not met or the rules agreed upon between the members of the couple are not met.
Among these risks is the breakup of the couple as one of its components can come to consider that the other people with whom they maintain relationships give their partner something that he or she is not capable of giving them. There is also the risk of emotional involvement if the contact is prolonged and repeated. People who are insecure, jealous, or have underlying relationship problems should not resort to these practices since they can worsen their situation.
Likewise, another of the aspects that usually causes the most problems is the fact that only one of the members of the couple really wants to have the exchange of partners, with the other being reluctant despite agreeing to carry it out. In these cases the party that does not really want to do so does not usually participate actively, may be suffering from it Likewise, the situation can worsen if the party who wanted it does not want it to be an isolated experience but rather a regular occurrence. That is why it is very important that there is good communication between the couple and that the aforementioned agreement exists between both parties.
In addition to this, obviously and as in any sexual practice with multiple partners, the use of prophylaxis such as condoms and other types of barrier mechanisms is necessary, given that the practice of non-monogamous sexual relations implies a risk of sexually transmitted infections and/or or pregnancy.
Confusions with other terms
It must be taken into account that although the basic principle is easy to understand, often the practice of swinging (which is what the practice itself is called) is confused with other types of sexual activities
First of all, it is not an act of infidelity but rather it is something previously agreed upon and accepted by both members of the couple. Nor is it about polyamory, the encounter being purely sexual and there being no romantic connection between the two couples. Finally, we are not talking about threesomes or orgies either, although in some of the parties and meetings of this type encounters of such characteristics can sometimes arise.
