The 10 Characteristics Of Relationships That Cancel Us Out
Luckily, today society is increasingly aware of the dangers of toxic relationships, that is, those in which the action of one of the members of the couple aims to annul the other person
However, we must not forget that people involved in a romantic relationship lose a good part of their ability to analyze their situation objectively, which is why it is common for people who suffer discomfort from their courtship or marriage to resist recognizing that problematic relational dynamics. And in situations like this, help is necessary to understand and manage the problems that arise from these types of links.
As professionals in psychology and human behavior, we take into account a series of characteristic elements that, used by one of the members of the couple, can override the other party.
Below you will find a list of the most important characteristics that can annul one of the members of the couple.
1. Jealousy
Jealousy in a couple is one of the main sources of discomfort that can destroy one or both of the partners.
Although on some occasions it tends to be a common response in some couples, the truth is that jealousy, when it is recurrent and very intense, can indicate that we are facing a problem that can lead to situations of abuse.
It is important to remember that excessive jealousy in a person is not so much related to love but rather to the need to control to the other person and that can be the origin of a toxic relationship.
Most abusive relationships are also based on control and submission towards the other person a way to nullify her as an individual, reduce her self-esteem and turn her into a slave.
Some of the forms of control can be imposing strict arrival times at home, prohibiting meeting friends or family, constantly giving opinions about the other person’s appearance or clothes, and also prohibiting the other person from wearing certain clothes or doing certain activities.
Although it does not go to the extreme of abuse, some relationships are based on subtle control by one of the parties towards the other person. In these cases it is also important prevent the other member of the couple from controlling us or preventing us from carrying out any activity in daily life ; and if necessary, seek help and end the relationship immediately.
The way to avoid excessive control of oneself by the partner is to establish limits and own spaces where the other person does not have the right to give their opinion or control our will.
3. Impositions
Another element closely related to control in the couple are impositions: imposition of their future plans, personal tastes, etc
Once again, it is necessary to claim one’s own rights and prevent the other person from imposing anything on us beyond our will, establishing clear personal limits that should not be exceeded.
For a relationship to work correctly, agreements or common points must be reached through consensus and never imposing anything on the other person.
4. Disrespect
Disrespect is another of the classic ways of canceling the other member of the couple, and Its constant presence can be the definitive sign that we are facing a toxic relationship or one directly based on abuse
Disrespect can be subtle or very obvious, and can occur both in public and in private; In any case, these aim to humiliate the other person or subject them to the will of the couple.
5. Relationship based on fear of rejection
Instilling fear of abandonment or rejection is also a mechanism to annul the other member of the couple, and is one of the most common forms of abuse that exists.
One of the ways in which fear can occur as a relationship mechanism can occur when one of the members has afraid to express your opinion on a topic for fear that the other person will get angry
You may be interested: “How to overcome the fear of being single: 4 practical tips”
6. Unequal distribution of work
As in any other type of relationship, Couple relationships must be based on equality of both rights and obligations
An unequal distribution of household chores can be a sign of mistreatment or inconsideration towards the other person and is also an effective way of overriding their will or humiliating them.
Sharing common tasks, whether at home or with children, is a sign of respect and consideration for the other person and a good way to get deeply involved to ensure the good future of the relationship.
7. Lack of empathy
Empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and it is an essential quality for the functioning of a relationship, as well as any other social interaction.
In this regard, it is important not only to be aware of the other person’s feelings but also to react accordingly and quickly to help in any way possible whenever our partner may be going through a period of discomfort or has had a difficult day.
Related article: “Empathy, much more than putting yourself in someone else’s shoes”
Like disrespect, indifference to your feelings or to the person’s achievements It is also a way to undermine your self-esteem and generate a state of discomfort.
Being aware of our partner’s needs for affection or recognition and being attentive at all times to their achievements is a way to show affection and dedication.
9. Emotional blackmail
Emotional blackmail is a very common form of manipulation in some couples and that some people put into practice with the aim of getting something in return.
This practice can even destroy the person who is the victim of blackmail. making you feel entirely responsible for the well-being of the other
You may be interested: “The 8 types of emotional blackmail (and signs to detect it)”
10. Constant criticism
Some people, both men and women, have tendency to constantly criticize their partners in everything they do or say and often this form of relationship becomes an increasingly common mechanism as the relationship progresses.
Having a partner who habitually criticizes any aspect of our person ends up being very negative on a psychological level and is a very effective cancellation mechanism.
