The 10 Signs To Identify And Neutralize A Toxic Person
In other articles we have addressed the reality of toxic people, those individuals who, although they usually have no bad intentions, manage to bring out the worst version of those around them.
However… What are the signs that help us recognize toxic behaviors or toxic people? Let’s see it below.
As a psychologist, I am not a big fan of labeling people, and even less so when these labels are negative. In fact, it seems that the concept of “toxic person” has appeared in certain types of literature as a way of cataloging the personality of certain individuals, and it is rarely explained that character and habits can be changed.
Therefore, a person can cause discomfort to those close to him under certain circumstances, but You should never make the mistake of thinking that toxic people cannot change We can all change, absolutely everyone. Someone may even consider you a toxic person, so we must relativize this label and give it a new meaning, which helps us escape from situations that make us suffer, but not as a way to despise or stigmatize someone.
Toxic personality: sometimes it is worth walking away
Who hasn’t had a cynical boss, an obnoxious coworker, or a brother-in-law who keeps telling us what to do? Dealing with toxic people can be inevitable in certain contexts But what we can control is how we deal with their behaviors.
If we do not act with due precautions, negative people They can influence us and make us feel bad In addition, it is possible that we accumulate tension and stress from having to live with them. More than enough reasons to try to get rid of this psychological burden.
Here I propose nine signs that should alert you that a toxic person is consuming you. The time has come to put black on white, because no one has the right to make you feel bad
1. You talk a lot about the toxic person
If you notice that you are constantly complaining to your coworkers about how manipulative your office boss is or complaining to your partner about how bad your mother-in-law makes you feel at family gatherings, you should know that this attitude affects you.It will exhaust you mentally, and of course it will not help the situation
Talking about the toxic person over and over again only reduces your self-esteem and gives them more importance than they really have. You’re not going to solve anything by dwelling on it, and you may start to become annoying to those who have to listen to your constant complaints.
2. It makes you lose your temper
If your daily life is being affected by an expert manipulator or by people who criticize you behind your back, you should know that toxic individuals can affect your emotional balance You must be careful, because it is easy for them to cause frustration and even anger. If this happens, it is time to take action and fix the problem.
3. Your self-esteem suffers
Toxic people are usually rude, impolite and can be very offensive and annoying. Sometimes their degrading treatment of you can make you feel bad, but Remember that your value as a person should never be subordinated to opinions (and much less to insults and humiliations) from someone other than yourself.
4. You blame them for your behavior or attitude
If a toxic person manages to get you through their hoop and manipulate you, It may happen that you constantly blame that person for the decisions you make and for everything bad that happens to you If you think the toxic person is to blame for everything, reconsider the situation. Maybe you just blame him to avoid your responsibility. It’s your life, and if there is someone who has so much power over you, it is best that you try to walk away and start accepting the responsibility you have for your own destiny.
If you dread the thought that you should spend time with that person, there is no doubt that, at least for you, That individual is toxic and has the ability to create strong discomfort in you If just by anticipating that you are going to have to meet that toxic partner in a meeting you already begin to have negative feelings, it is an unequivocal sign that something has to change in your life.
6. You lower yourself to their level
When someone constantly gets on your nerves, You may be tempted to jump in and start confronting him This will cause you to begin to have reactive attitudes and behaviors that are probably not in line with your personal values. Falling into the game of the toxic person may be inevitable if it takes us to an extreme, but it is not the way to resolve the situation. In fact, you’ll probably only make things worse and more desperate.
7. It prevents you from being relaxed and comfortable
When we find ourselves besieged by people who manipulate us or use twisted strategies to demotivate us, there may come a point where we feel in a state of constant tension and worry. AND When we are uneasy, it is easier for things to go wrong If you don’t manage to keep a cool head and relativize the situation, the toxic person will take over your ground. That is why it is important that you manage to distance yourself emotionally from the source of toxicity.
When we live in a permanent state of tension, we can react negatively. For example, to mitigate the restlessness we feel, we can indulge in some unhealthy “indulgence,” such as having a drink of alcohol from time to time or eating more than necessary. It is an unhealthy way to tackle the feeling of anxiety, and It takes you into a vicious circle from which it will be very difficult to get out
9. It also affects your partner emotionally
The toxic person may be something like an authority figure (a boss, a teacher, your father or mother…) that you cannot question. If it happens that he humiliates you and your level of emotional exhaustion increases, You can make the mistake of transferring your focus of discomfort to our partner, children or family members A bad mood is contagious, and if you let the toxic person contaminate you, you may become a toxic person for those closest to you and make people suffer who are not to blame.
10. Look for confrontation
Many people’s incentive to socialize is precisely to seek confrontation to have the opportunity to show their superiority to the person subjected to their attacks. In these cases, obviously, we can say that we are dealing with a toxic person, so there are no reasons to continue extending these social interactions.
Manage the presence of toxic people in your life
If toxic people are bringing out the worst version of you, It is going to be necessary for you to consider some type of change in your life
This can happen through a simple change in mentality: not getting involved in their manipulative games or ignoring their presence, for example. In other cases, the best decision may be to get away from this source of negativity and bad mood before it ends up seriously affecting you.
