The 3 Communication Styles, And How To Recognize Them

Communication styles.

Communication styles are the main ways in which we exchange information Knowing how to recognize and manage them appropriately is key to improving the quality of personal relationships.

In this article we will see what communication styles are like divided into their categories: the assertive, the passive and the aggressive In addition, we will see how to adapt them to the communicative contexts that we use.

Communication styles

The human mind is complex, and this is due, among other things, to the fact that communication with others allows us to learn all kinds of concepts and ideas about the environment.

Without this capacity, not only would we be desert islands from a psychological point of view, but we would not even be able to think, since we do not have language. Despite this, the fact that living in society we learn to express ourselves does not mean that we always do it well. That is why it is good to know the communication styles.

These communication styles depend, among other things, on the attitudes and elements of social skills that we use. to express our ideas and emotional states or feelings

1. Aggressive style

The elements that characterize this style of communication are verbal and non-verbal threats, as well as direct accusations and reproaches. Ultimately, the objective of this set of initiatives is enter a power dynamic in which oneself has control and the other part is minimized.

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The aim is not so much to communicate valuable information that one has, but rather to have a concrete effect on the other person or those observing the interaction, to gain power. Furthermore, the use of the ad hominem fallacy, or direct insults, is not strange.

On the other hand, the use of the aggressive communication style is also characterized by paraverbal and non-verbal elements that express anger or hostility For example, raised tone of voice, muscle tension, etc.

2. Inhibited or passive style

This is a communication style based on the inhibition of those thoughts and feelings that in normal situations could be expressed.

The ultimate purpose is to greatly limit the communicative flow, either because there is something that is hidden since it is incriminating information, or because there is a fear of the possibility of not pleasing others. There is also the possibility that the reason for adopting this attitude is simple disinterest, or the desire to end a dialogue as soon as possible.

In practice, the passive communication style It is typical of shy people, who appear insecure in personal relationships, or introverted ones, who try to communicate more with less. This means that fear does not have to be the trigger. There are those who understand that the “default” state is isolation and loneliness, and that every effort made to express oneself must be justified.

Furthermore, if there is something important that you want to say but you are afraid to communicate it, often it is said behind the back of the person concerned The characteristics of this style of communication include relatively little eye contact, a low tone of voice, short answers or those with little relation to what is being spoken, and non-verbal language that expresses a defensive attitude or insecurity (although this last component varies more).

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3. Assertive style

In the assertive style, what one thinks and feels is directly communicated, as long as one believes that it has value and that it will not make someone excessively uncomfortable. That is, you communicate honestly and transparently, but without trying to dominate the other person.

Thus, an attempt is made to ensure that one’s own social skills establish a balance in which both one’s own interests and those of the other person are taken into account. so that relevant information flows without complications

Given these characteristics, this is considered the most desirable communication style for most situations.

The use of these expressive resources

Although the vast majority of people are capable of resorting to communication styles, we can distinguish between individuals according to the degree to which they tend to adopt one of them more frequently.

For example, in situations of conflict of interest, some people will tend to quickly adopt an aggressive communication style, or a passive one, etc.

Furthermore, on the other hand, although generally the assertive style is the most appropriate, There are specific situations in which passive or aggressive styles can make sense For example, when recognizing a serious mistake that one has made, or when expressing frustration over a situation that is someone else’s fault. Rationality does not always come before our way of relating; in fact, it often has little influence over it.