The Problem Of Positive Thinking: 4 Keys To Understanding It
Positive thinking can be a very beneficial mental disposition if we are realistic with the environment that surrounds us and the situation in which we find ourselves. After all, many of the problems we usually deal with on a daily basis are more fictitious and manufactured by ourselves than real.
However, positive thinking can become a trap which invites us to avoid facing the problems we encounter in our daily lives.
Although the popular saying says “a good face to bad weather,” it is necessary to analyze this phrase and be aware that it is not enough to just put a good face to bad weather. Let’s imagine a rainy day when we have to go to work on foot. If we don’t use an umbrella we will get wet, so we have to find a solution to bad weather: take out the umbrella.
As stated by Bárbara Ehrenreich, author of the book Smile or Die: The Positive Thinking Trap, “When we have problems, looking away may make us feel better at first, but not in the long run. Being emotionally intelligent will allow us to be connected to reality and our emotions, which in the long run will be better than avoiding the problems that may appear in our lives.” We must face delicate situations, it is not enough to put a smile on them and hope that they will solve themselves.
Our attitude can help us overcome bad moments in life, but it is not the only requirement to solve the problems that arise. That being said, it is always better to look forward with a positive mindset than with a negative mindset. When a positive mindset is combined with problem-solving skills, realism and courage, our well-being increases.
But what are people with a positive mindset like? These individuals have a series of characteristics that you can find below.
If you want to delve deeper into these characteristics, you can read this article: “11 characteristics of optimistic people”
The problems of positive thinking: its limitations
Positive thinking can be good in some situations, but not in all, because sometimes we get carried away by beliefs based on falsehoods. Let’s see what the limitations of this type of thinking are.
1. Positive thinking is more than just attitude
Thinking that with a positive attitude we will achieve everything in life and prevent difficult situations from disappearing is a mistake. positive thinking It must always be accompanied by a strong personality and good self-esteem, in addition to realistic thinking. Therefore, one can impose a positive mentality and hope that everything happens in his favor.
In this sense, Having your feet on the ground is a key factor in avoiding irrational expectations. Positive people can also fail, the key is for them to get up, grow as people and continue on their path.
2. Positive thinking does not solve problems
Positive thinking can help you stay motivated to move forward, but It is not the only aspect that we must take into account to solve problems. We have to do our part so that things are solved and turn out the way we want, so willpower and realism are necessary.
Likewise, believing in oneself is also necessary to not break down in difficult moments, because otherwise we would be talking about false self-confidence, and we would use positive thinking to excuse ourselves and not having to face reality. If you want to know more about false self-confidence you can read the article “False self-confidence: the heavy mask of self-deception”.
3. Positive thinking does not equal happiness
There are many factors that influence a person’s happiness, and believing that with positive thinking everything will be rosy is irrational. As I said, positive thinking It is not something that one should impose on oneself, but the person must have a strong personality and healthy self-esteem and, in addition, adopt this way of thinking. Of course, always realistically.
Positive thinking is not looking away when things are not going well, but rather facing reality and accepting it as it is. Afterwards, one can look to the future with hope and work on the path they want for themselves.
4. One cannot have positive thinking all the time
You can’t live life with a smile on your face all the time, as if the context in which one lives did not matter. There are situations in which one must suffer and cry if necessary, as a way of freeing oneself from the emotions that affect one. Experiencing pain at some point in our lives is totally normal. In fact, the best lessons are those that occur after an adverse situation.
As I said in the previous lines, false optimism is an attempt to hide low self-esteem. It is not necessary to show a smile and pretend that everything is fine. That, sooner or later, disillusions, despairs and frustrates a person.
