The Psychological Consequences Of Emotional Dependence
People who suffer from emotional dependence will describe how their emotions are at the expense of their partner in an excessive way. Any slightest detail can be taken as a sign that something is wrong in the relationship and cause enormous suffering in the person who has this problem.
It must be noted that emotional dependence is not love, but rather excessive dependence on the partner hidden behind the core belief that “life ends without that person.”
How can I know if I suffer from emotional dependence?
People who have this problem usually express some of the beliefs discussed below:
What are the short-term consequences of suffering from emotional dependence?
The first consequence at first glance is that these people live with great suffering They can spend all day controlling their partner, paying attention to what they do or don’t do and having increasingly intense emotional reactions when the partner does not show themselves as the dependent person expects them to.
In any relationship, it is easy for our partner to end up behaving at some point in a way that we do not like and still continue despite the displeasure and anger. The dependent person may observe that, despite his complaints, her partner does not change. This may have a detrimental impact on her self-esteem, as she may make the mistake of not considering herself “good” enough for his partner to change for him or her.
In fact, self-esteem and emotional dependence are closely related to each other and, in addition, they feed off each other. Having a strong self-esteem can function as a protective factor against emotional dependence since the beliefs we have discussed above lose meaning.
People who suffer from low self-esteem end up transmitting their “need” for love to their partner. By appearing needy, they will cross all existing limits and accept situations that are not to their liking in order not to lose their partner, which can end up generating very toxic relationships.
Abuse can be present at times, although we are not talking about physical abuse as such. There may be humiliation, coercion and manipulation that will be overlooked in order to continue the relationship.
When to ask for help?
In many cases the consequences of emotional dependence are trivialized However, the person who has this problem ends up finding that many areas of his life are affected as a result of this.
Many people leave jobs or make important life decisions based on their partner’s wants and needs, without taking into account what they really want themselves. It is also very common for other personal relationships, such as friends and family, to be put aside to dedicate all the available time to their partner, so that their social circle is in many cases severely reduced.
In addition, these relationships tend to become very toxic, so in the end we can see that a large part of life can be disrupted as a result of this problem. If you feel like you’ve entered a loop that you don’t know how to get out of, maybe it’s time to ask for help.
