The Tree Of Worries

The tree of worries

I want to present here my analogy of “tree of worries” We all know that a tree is made up of three main parts: its roots, its trunk and its branches.

What it took us a while to discover is that the volume of the roots is similar to that of its branches. So, A tree has a double crown: one aerial and visible and another underground and hidden

Needs versus concerns

Our concerns are closely linked to our needs. In fact, if we consider Maslow’s famous pyramid of needs, its author explains that one does not worry about trying to satisfy a higher level need if his lower level needs are not met This translates as follows: it is more urgent to breathe than to drink, to drink than to eat and to feel secure than self-fulfilled…

For this reason, it seems that the gradation of concerns is presented differently than that of needs. For example, our most immediate need, that of breathing, except in extraordinary circumstances, does not concern us at all.

A need, understood as a lack or deficiency, is something passive, while concern is proactive, prepare for action. Worry is literally a preoccupation, that is, a preparation to get busy satisfying a need or solving a problem.

Worry differs from need because of its anticipatory nature. One may not be hungry because they just ate but worry about what they are going to eat tomorrow despite having the physiological need to eat covered.

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Logic and chronology

Maslow’s pyramid is established on a logical criterion: the fact that some needs are more necessary than others. But the tree of preoccupations is also understood following a chronological or evolutionary point of view. The first thing we see of the tree is its aerial crown that represents the conditions of the enjoyment of life:

The baby is concerned about improving himself at every moment, he is in pure self-realization seeking new body movements every day (turning, sitting, crawling,…), sounds. The baby’s concern is her self-realization while her basic needs do not concern him at all, she is in the immediacy, she is in charge of manifesting herself to be attended to when something is needed, but she does not anticipate anything. It is the parents or caregivers who worry about preparing food, clothing… The baby only cares about his personal improvement because he has his other needs covered

As children we continue to worry about playing and satisfying our needs for movement and curiosity.

Later in adolescence we are concerned about relationships with friends that give us affiliation and recognition.

With the end of childhood, a golden age of carefree and enjoyment ends. And finally, We become aware that our conditions of enjoyment (that which makes life worth living), are based on roots that until then were hidden from our sight: the conditions of possibility of the life we ​​live.

In adulthood is when we begin to take charge of ourselves. worry about things that have to do with those conditions of possibility of our life: pay the rent, get food, shelter and, for this, remuneration… When we say that children are robbed of their childhood, it is usually because they have to worry about their basic safety and/or physiological needs in the absence of an adult who assumes that responsibility. .

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worry tree

How deep do the roots go…?

Even as adults, many people tend to only worry about the things that are close to them, while they delegate more distant concerns to others. For example, we usually worry about refueling the car tank before we run out of fuel, but we do not worry about whether oil is a non-renewable resource, increasingly less available or polluting.

We worry about filling the refrigerator with food, but not about the fact that thousands of hectares of arable soil are lost every year due to erosion due to modern intensive agriculture. We worry about getting our children to school on time but not about the usefulness of the school program. We worry about paying our bills, but not about the economy of the country in which we live. We take the medicines we are prescribed without worrying about the lucrative interests behind health policies.

We buy consumer goods without worrying about the sustainability of our way of life In all these cases we assume that worrying about it is the job of people who assume that responsibility and who we consider competent.

When not worrying is not an option

When people begin to worry about the conditions of possibility of their existence, for example: about climate change, the need to save energy, the possibility of a war, or because the people responsible are incompetent, an awareness occurs. and an often painful maturation process. We may feel helpless when we discover these new worries a bit as if the tree of metaphor had extended its roots to discover that the conditions of possibility of our lives are based on realities not as firm as we trusted.

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For some, these fundamental concerns will cease to be so through distraction or entertainment. For others, awareness may give rise to anxiety, eco-anxiety or distress and require real and profound but immediately impossible practical changes to be made in the way of living, to ensure the ability to satisfy needs on a lasting basis Governing your life is foreseeing and acting so that we do not lack anything essential, it is caring in the good sense of the word.

In conclusion

If you feel worried about threats of drastic changes in your life, your concerns may be legitimate and deserve to be heard and taken into account. It can be difficult to share certain concerns, even in therapy, but I encourage you to do so to find a solution.