Types Of Attachment And Their Consequences In Adult Life
Developmental Psychology It is the branch of Psychology that is responsible for understanding the maturational development processes of people from the first stage of life to old age, including both.
Using this knowledge, mental health experts can establish which behaviors and situations promote good psychological development, and which elements are capable of “derailing” these processes.
Childhood is, of all the phases of life, the one that deserves special attention, given that in these early years we are especially sensitive to what is happening around us and the consequences of our actions. In fact, exposing ourselves to experiences that negatively mark us can cause problems that last for years or even decades if we do not have professional psychological help.
In this article we are going to focus on one of the main ways in which, for better and worse, what happens in the context in which we create ourselves influences our development and even what we tend to do, think and feel. Maybe we are adults. These are the types of attachment that we establish with our fathers and mothers
Technically, attachment is the set of psychological phenomena that lead us to adopt concrete and stable patterns of behavior when we relate to other individuals or groups But in practice, in the case of Developmental Psychology, the concept of attachment that is most interesting is the one that refers to the patterns of behavior, thinking and management of emotions that we develop as a result of the way in which we During our childhood we interact with our reference people: fathers and mothers, or in their absence, the people who adopt these roles.
And the fact is that human beings do not mature psychologically in a self-sufficient way, interacting with the world on our own. We are a species characterized by our marked dependence on adults during our first years of life, and this is not by chance. If we are capable of thinking in a sophisticated way and have great intelligence, it is precisely because in most cases we have a support network made up of society, and at the center of this network are the most important figures: our parents and mothers.
Generally, this allows us to have many needs guaranteed, so that our body can afford to focus on the maintenance and development of a large brain that quickly fills up with information. And since this predisposes us to learn a lot from a very young age, we are constantly internalizing knowledge, even if we don’t realize it. And in this sense, Interaction with parents is one of the main ways of entry of information
However, what we learn through the relationship with our caregivers does not simply remain in the realm of the intellectual: it involves our emotions, since the emotional is one of the fastest ways of learning and capable of leaving things recorded in our memory. . Therefore, practically from the beginning of our existence we develop a certain type of attachment with these people. This type of attachment will generate a “domino effect” in our predisposition to behave since at that stage of life there is almost everything to explore and at the same time our main references, the caregivers, are only one or two.
Thus, the mother or father is the area that is familiar to us and from which we explore the unknown. But, unfortunately, not in all cases “familiar” means “safe” or “nice”, and this can lead to long-term problems derived from a type of dysfunctional attachment.
The elements that psychologists specialized in Developmental Psychology look at to know what type of attachment a minor has developed or is developing are, mainly, the appearance of these behavioral patterns on the part of the boy or girl, directed towards the mother or father:
From these criteria it is possible to establish the presence of different attachment styles which we will explain below.
Types of attachment in childhood, and their influence on adulthood
Now that we have seen what the attachment patterns developed during childhood consist of, it is time to go into details and understand the details and distinctive characteristics of each of them, as well as the way in which they affect the development of the adult personality.
In the same way that the way in which the foundations of a building are arranged will limit the forms that the constructions that go on them can take, the types of attachment that we have developed in our childhood, mainly with our parents, also They have a great influence on the paths that our personality development and behavioral patterns will take that we express in adulthood.
Therefore, having a good understanding of the way in which a boy or girl is being raised is useful to prevent the appearance of future psychological complications and dysfunctional patterns of social interaction.
Of course, it would be a mistake to believe that the types of attachment developed in the first years of life only affect the way in which we tend to relate to others once we are adults.
Of course, this area of life is one of those that most clearly shows how we come to bond with our primary caregivers during childhood, but we must not forget that The way we learned to interact with others as children shapes our way of thinking and feeling in general ; After all, if we think through abstract concepts it is thanks to socialization and the use of language that we “inherit” from others.
For this reason, attachment types also participate in all internalizing psychological processes: the maintenance of one form or another of self-esteem, our way of seeing reality and, in general, the philosophy of life that we adopt without realizing it and that It leads us to be who we are.
Having said the above, these are the different ways in which attachment types influence behavioral dynamics once the adult stage has been reached.
1. Secure attachment
Secure attachment occurs when parents manage to adjust to the balance of the need for protection and freedom of the little ones: They let them explore at their leisure but safely, and at the same time they are there for everything they need, both materially and emotionally. Therefore, it is the most desirable type of attachment.
Regarding its implications for adulthood, people who developed this form of attachment tend to feel supported by people with whom they trust and in general feel encouraged to undertake their projects if the material and intellectual conditions are met to achieve them. that goal. In addition, they have an easier time developing good self-esteem.
In avoidant attachment, children learn that They cannot expect much from their caregivers, and therefore show a tendency to avoid social experiences and they seem absorbed in stimuli that they can focus on as individuals.
Once they have reached adulthood, those who developed this type of attachment may need psychological help to learn to properly manage their social relationships and adopt long-term commitments, given that they find it difficult to trust others and by default tend to focus on them. themselves.
3. Ambivalent attachment
In ambivalent attachment, children fear the unpredictability of interactions with their caregivers, given that sometimes they flow well and other times bring unpleasant experiences. Not knowing what to expect leads them to develop alterations linked to anxiety
In adulthood, ambivalent attachment can give way to anxiety problems whose consequences accumulate over time, and it is also common to develop dependency in relationships, when feeling worried about abandonment.
4. Disorganized attachment
Disorganized attachment is the most harmful type of attachment, and is directly pathological It occurs in clearly dysfunctional families in which there is violence, drug use, poor living conditions, etc. Due to the hostility of this context, disorganized attachment is associated with psychiatric disorders.
In adulthood, disorganized attachment is associated with a greater predisposition to developing practically any type of psychological or psychiatric disorder, and in a large portion of cases there is damage from trauma that must be treated.
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