What Are Personal Insecurities And How Can You Treat Them?
Personal insecurities mean that, every day, millions of people not only do not consider achieving goals that are meaningful to them, but also believe that they feel bad for the simple fact of thinking about achieving them. That is why they are a psychological problem frequently addressed in psychotherapy.
Here we will talk about What are personal insecurities and how do they influence us?.
To understand what personal insecurities consist of, you must first know how to place this psychological phenomenon in the broader concept of “self-esteem.”
We understand self-esteem as the set of beliefs and ideas that we associate with the concept of “I” and the emotions and feelings that these elements generate in us. That is, self-esteem is how we feel in relation to what we think we know about ourselves as individuals.
If we go into more detail on this topic, we will see that self-esteem is made up of these elements:
On the other hand, self-esteem can be more or less adjusted to reality, and it causes problems when it is. In this sense, Personal insecurities arise when our self-esteem tends to be lower than it should be. and it generates a discomfort in us that paralyzes us and represents an obstacle when it comes to improving and progressing in some aspect of our lives.
Personal insecurities or personal complexes are a series of limiting beliefs about the “I”, which They lead us to magnify our imperfections and represent an unnecessary limitation in our way of living life.. That is, they are beliefs that anchor us to a low self-esteem in order not to test certain personal limits that we see as inevitable, linked to our essence as individuals.
An example of personal insecurities is a woman who, because of how she perceives her appearance, assumes that everyone will make fun of her and therefore does not try to make friends. Another example: a man who, being the person in his group of friends who earns the least, assumes that he has no authority to talk about anything when he is with them.
@image(id)
What to do when faced with discomfort caused by personal insecurities?
Each case of problems due to personal insecurities has its own combination and causes, and the proposed solutions must be adapted to these and the characteristics of the person who suffers from them. But beyond this fact, there are some general tips that usually help in situations of this type. Let’s see what they are.
1. Do not opt for avoidance or rumination
Two of the least emotionally healthy ways to manage insecurities consist of two seemingly opposite attitudes. On the one hand, there are those who try to keep those stimuli and thoughts related to your personal insecurities completely out of your consciousness.
On the other hand, there are those who, consciously or unconsciously, become so obsessed with the topic that they think about him constantlywhether fantasizing about being a person completely freed from those supposed defects or feeding tragic thoughts about how one is, the rejection that is hypothetically caused in others, etc.
Actually, These two ways of experiencing personal insecurities are very similar, because they both give them more strength, more prominence.and they make us pay more attention to them, in addition to seeing them as something over which we have no control (because it is impossible to “block” thoughts).
As we will see, the appropriate ways to overcome personal insecurities are to accept their existence in the present, as well as the discomfort they generate, but without giving them more power than they have.
2. Detect the personal and media relationships that may be fueling them
Personal insecurities almost never have causes outside the social environment of the person who suffers from it.. Many times the media feeds them by claiming beauty standards and a media version of celebrities that are totally unattainable.
Something similar can happen with certain friendship relationships, especially when unfair criticism is used under the excuse of honesty.
Knowing how to detect these problematic aspects is important to neutralize their influence on us.either by exposing ourselves less to them or, in the case of friends, confronting them about this fact to demand that they stop adopting that toxic attitude.
3. Distinguish between what you can change and what you can’t
Behind many personal insecurities, there are aspects of ourselves that we cannot change, and others that can be improved. Establishes a list of each of these aspects, making them included in two different categories, and then select the most important of those that you see that you can change in the short or medium term. This way you can set specific goals to achieve it and, by seeing your progress, you will have the necessary motivation to face the rest.
You may be interested: “What is locus of control?”
It is very common for personal insecurities to feed on the stereotypes that circulate across all cultures.. For example, ideas behind classism and “you have so much, you have so much” or gender roles keep many people in situations of submission and apparent inability to overcome certain limits of personal development.
Related article: “What are stereotypes? 4 ways they affect us”
4. If you need it, go to therapy
If you see that nothing seems to work, the best option is to attend psychotherapy to have personalized psychological support adapted to you.
You may be interested: “The 8 benefits of going to psychological therapy”
Are you looking for professional psychological assistance?
If you are interested in starting a psychological therapy process for an emotional problem or psychological disorder that may be affecting you, contact us.
In Advance Psychologists We have more than two decades of experience in the sector, and we serve people of all ages. Our services include individualized psychotherapy, family therapy, couples therapy, sexology, speech therapy, coaching, neuropsychology and psychiatry. In addition, the sessions can be carried out in person at our center in Madrid or through the online modality by video call.
