Communication is a natural action for human beings since words are a means of expression that promotes dialogue and interpersonal relationships. However, there are blocking situations that can occur in this plane of reality. For example, a person may feel uncomfortable talking to others. This type of circumstance produces discomfort and discomfort to those who feel vulnerable due to this fact that generates insecurity.
The risk of feeling uncomfortable when speaking is that you take the wrong step of spending most of your time in your comfort zone: your home. Why do I get nervous when speaking? In PsychologyFor we tell you.
There are different factors that can produce this situation. Below we list several possible examples.
Nervousness when speaking in public
An oral exam, presenting a project in the office, giving a presentation or any action that involves the challenge of speaking in public can produce nervousness even in experienced people. The fear of speaking in public connects with other fears, for example, fear of ridicule or negative criticism.
However, very often people make a negative interpretation of nervousness prior to a test of these characteristics when, in reality, this can also be a symptom of personal interest in showing the best version of oneself in this situation. That is, nervousness can also be a manifestation of becoming aware of one’s own responsibility. However, in this case, the nerves disappear after the test is over or even before.
Fall in love
When a person gets excited and begins to feel something special for another but does not know if it is reciprocated, they can also experience that nervousness that is perfectly represented through the metaphor of butterflies in the stomach. That is to say, the expectation of love places the protagonist on a horizon of hopes, idealization, doubts and insecurities. In this case, this nervousness is overcome over time by gaining more trust with the other person.
Social anxiety disorder
People who suffer from this form of social phobia feel uncomfortable feeling watched due to the panic they experience when faced with the judgment of others. Those affected by this diagnosis suffer emotionally and may even have anxiety attacks when surrounded by other people. This can happen both on a personal and professional level.
In this case, suffering is also conditioned by the power of anticipation since the person may dramatically imagine how they are going to feel at an event to which they have been invited or to which they have to attend in just a few weeks.
To learn a new language
When learning a new language, the nervousness of those who feel insecure when they do not express themselves in their native language can arise because they fear making a fool of themselves in the pronunciation of some words or in the use of incorrect expressions. This fear is very present, and precisely, it is one of those that most blocks the personal objective of linguistic immersion because the emotion that causes the most discomfort to those who feel nervous for this reason is shame.
Dependence on new technologies
Those people who are very used to interacting through social networks and WhatsApp, however, do not have the practical experience of face-to-face relationships, experience this nervousness when facing these situations due to lack of habit. They feel that behind a device they have a greater projection compared to the improvisation produced by the close contact in the proximity of two people who meet to have a coffee, take a walk or go to the movies. Mobile phone addiction is a problem that has recently appeared in our society that must be treated immediately.
How to speak in public without nerves
What can you do if you get nervous in this type of situation?
It is important that you promote a gradual exposure around those moments and situations in which you feel this way. Don’t avoid them because when you act this way the fear is magnified. To learn to manage your fear instead of feeling overwhelmed by it, it is recommended that you define short-term goals that you want to achieve in relation to that issue. For example, you can set a goal to make a suggestion at the company’s next work meeting.
Prepare the situation This planning can not only be interesting when it comes to developing a conference script. In your own private life, you can reinforce the proactive attitude of preparing ideas for possible conversation topics to maintain in a leisure plan. These ideas do not make up a script, however, they allow you to gain self-confidence in the face of uncomfortable silences.
Relativize your concern This fear is an example of how the human being is conditioned by the power of his own subjectivity. And, while he suffers so much from this situation, the perception that others have is very different. Whoever lives conditioned by the judgment of others magnifies his defects, that is, he is conditioned by his own view. So, from now on, try to work on your thoughts to identify what you are telling yourself and what alternative message you can come up with. Use writing as a means to encourage introspection.
You can practice exercise routines to rehearse hypothetical moments that may occur in your life. The formula of role playing It is especially effective. For example, if you get nervous when speaking in a job interview, then rehearse situations focused on this topic.
If you experience this nervousness frequently, then a film as instructive as “The King’s Speech” is educational for the viewer. A film starring Colin Firth. It tells the story of King George VI who was conditioned by his stuttering when reading speeches relating to his office. With the specialized support of Lionel Logue, a speech therapy specialist, he gradually overcomes his own limits. This movie is also an example that sometimes it is important to ask for professional help to overcome this difficulty.
Tricks to not get nervous
Try to mentally observe yourself in situations in which you communicate with others from a plane of assertiveness that you really want to achieve. Let your imagination fly and use the practice of visualization to nourish this well-being in your heart.
Breathing control When you get nervous, it affects the way you breathe. For this reason, try to focus your attention on this point to regain control of the situation.
You are facing a person who is equal to you. Someone with positive qualities and areas for improvement. Therefore, position yourself in this level of equality far from any type of idealization of the other’s capabilities.
Observation Just as great novel authors are also lovers of reading, to overcome the nervousness of speaking you can also encourage the habit of observing others in situations of this type. Through observation you also learn to model the gestures that you would like to internalize.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Why do I get nervous when speaking? we recommend that you enter our Personality category.
