Why Do Relationship Problems Increase On Vacation?
In certain couple profiles, the vacation period goes hand in hand with new sources of potential conflicts. Luckily, knowing in advance these possible psychological factors capable of destabilizing a relationship is useful to prevent these problems, because they help to act in time and, if necessary, seek professional help in couples therapy.
So, in this article you will find a summary of the causes of why relationship problems increase on vacation
Why can vacations contribute to the appearance of relationship problems?
There are several studies that indicate the existence of a curious phenomenon: Just after the July and August holiday period, the number of divorces rises significantly at least in Western countries.
Of course, it does not seem that vacations in themselves represent a problem for courtships and marriages, an obstacle when it comes to enjoying life as a couple. Ultimately, there is no one way to experience vacation days, and it would be hasty to assume that everyone involved in romantic relationships experiences them in the same way.
Rather, what happens is that vacations act as a catalyst for relationship problems that were already latent, accelerating the deterioration of that bond. Let’s see in a little more detail how this happens.
1. The beginning of the holidays enhances impulsivity
It has been seen that the prospect of starting a vacation soon generates a predisposition to impulsive behavior, something that is reflected even in economic decisions and purchasing behaviors, but also in the management of personal relationships. This could also translate into a greater propensity for unilateral decisions where prior deliberation would have been necessary, talking things over to choose what to do together. Or it could even lead people in a relationship to expose themselves more to the temptation of infidelity.
2. In long-distance relationships, you begin to adapt to coexistence
Special cases such as those who maintain a long-distance relationship experience vacations in a way that has its own characteristics.
The most important thing in situations of this type is that two people who in many cases are not used to living together for many days in a row, reach a point where they can do so when they have free time… but maintaining expectations of well-being and harmony when living together. which are normally the same as in a non-distance relationship. They don’t expect to have to adapt to the challenge of living with someone they love but usually, they must do so through deliberate efforts, which can generate a feeling of unpleasant surprise and frustration.
3. If there are jealousy problems, they easily worsen
In relationships where there were already problems due to jealousy, it is very easy for the situation to get worse during the holidays. Greater exposure to leisure activities and new social circles with whom to interact feed controlling or almost paranoid type thoughts.
On vacation, differences stand out more when preferring more or less time to be alone This especially affects people who are in a relationship with someone quite different from them in the personality dimension introversion extraversion: it is much more common for introverts to prefer to spend more hours of the week alone, dedicating themselves to activities that can do on your own.
5. Managing free time together tests dialogue and negotiation skills
Even if both partners have little difference in their appreciation (or not) of solitude, You still have to decide how much time you spend in each other’s company Here both common interests play a role (travelling, going to museums, going to environments with a lot of nature, etc.) as well as negotiation and conflict resolution skills (to prevent them from turning into fights).
You may be interested: “Time management: 13 tips to take advantage of the hours of the day”
6. Lack of coordination with biorhythms
On the other hand, we must not forget that A lack of coordination when adjusting the “internal clock” can also be a source of problems during vacations as a couple. Waking up two or three hours apart from the other person means “giving up” a good part of the day.
7. Cycle closing expectations
Finally, we must also take into account that Vacations are, for many couples, a symbol or even an end-of-life ritual
There are people who hope to resolve their marital or dating problems during their two-week vacation, and if they don’t succeed for whatever reason, they automatically interpret it as a failure, a sign that the relationship is predestined to fail.
Related article: “Atkinson’s expectancy-value theory: what it is and what it proposes”
Are you looking for professional psychological support?
If you are interested in having the services of a psychologist with training and experience in the field of therapy, educational psychology and/or psychological expertise, I invite you to contact me.
My name is Froilán Ibáñez Recatalá and I work primarily from the cognitive-behavioral approach, serving adults and adolescents. The sessions are designed for individual patients or for couples going through a crisis stage, and can be carried out in person or through the online therapy format via video calls.
