Why Is It So Difficult For Women To Find A Good Male Lover?

Throughout history, women have dealt with rigid, unrealistic, and limited expectations about what it means to be a “good lover.” Among those promoted both by the porn industry and by Machismo itself. For many, this has meant giving up their own sexual and emotional needs and desires in favor of a macho and limited male version of pleasure.

But over time, those ideas have evolved. Since the massive practical manifestation of female empowerment and Feminism, contemporary women no longer only long for an emotional connection to get married and form a home, but also want reciprocity in physical satisfaction, complicity and a sexual relationship based on emotional intelligence.

And the idea of ​​a man who can balance passion, empathy and sexual skill remains, for many, something elusive or simply non-existent, which is why in many situations relationships end up being unbalanced in various ways, starting from everyday interactions to sexual.

Difficulties of contemporary man: the pressures of current masculinity

This article delves into the uncomfortable truth that no one mentions: Why, despite all the advances in the sexual and emotional field of couples, Finding a good male lover remains a significant challenge for many women. ?

1. Contradictory and confusing expectations

Contemporary man lives under conflicting pressures.

On the one hand, certain traditional stereotypes still persist that push him to be the dominant and insensitive one.

On the other hand, also You are expected to be emotionally accessible, empathetic and capable of maintaining balanced relationships with your partner. This generates a feeling of confusion and insecurity, since many men were not educated to validate their emotions nor do they have sufficient resources to balance these roles, especially if they come from traditionally conceived families.

Example : A man who, under pressure to be strong and “not show weakness”, may have difficulty opening up emotionally in his relationships, often resulting in conflict, misunderstanding or estrangement.

2. Performance and success anxiety

In a world that increasingly values ​​sex that lasts hours and demands a man with penetrating permanence and external validation of what is sold as a “good fuck,” many men feel an excessive pressure to sexually comply with this requirement promoted by porn. This performance anxiety can erode your self-esteem and put strain on your relationships.

Example : The pressure to meet sexual expectations imposed and also encouraged in many cases by women themselves, can prevent a man from feeling comfortable exploring his vulnerability or emotional needs in the intimate sphere, which affects his connection with his partner.

3. Lack of emotional and sexual skills

Although the discourse on the importance of emotional intelligence is booming, Many men grew up with the idea that expressing emotions is a sign of weakness or “not enough masculinity.” this is clearly reflected in the sexual dynamics of the couple.

Feeling anxious about being in a situation that is too desirable and not knowing how to handle it, or not wanting sexual interaction, the fear of not “looking bad” or simply not meeting expectations and not knowing how to express it is also common.

As a result, they lack practice in validating and recognizing emotion as well as processing and communicating what they feel, which can lead to unsatisfying, natural relationships or difficulties maintaining healthy bonds.

Example : In arguments as a couple, a man can withdraw, react with frustration or even violence because he does not know how to express his emotions, which generates tensions and conflicts that in some cases transcend into tragedies.

My invitation to you, who read this article, is that Don’t let the confusion and pressures of society continue to limit your ability to experience fulfilling and especially healthy relationships. : That is why the core of a healthy and meaningful relationship is work and personal development.

You need to nourish yourself with tools from experts in their areas to stop being part of the average men who limit their personal development to the interpretation of being a simple “good fuck”, I am sure that my book: The secrets of the superior lover It can be the first step to nourish your personal development emotional sex with women in all aspects. Find it available on Amazon.

Support yourself with mentors from whom you can constantly learn.