Why Is It So Easy To Fall In Love With Psychopaths?
Psychopaths are usually shown in series and movies as characters who only act out of their thirst for cruelty and sadism.
They think coldly, do not show empathy and are often not only violent, but also engage in activities considered aberrant. Definitely, They are the opposite of what could be considered a partner with whom to share a loving relationship
However, people with a high degree of psychopathy who inhabit the real world They are known precisely for their capacity to seduce , so it is easy to fall in love with them. Why is this happening?
People who stand out for their level of psychopathy do not have to feel the need to kill or harm people, but there is something about them that almost always holds true: They manipulate others, even without realizing it And, furthermore, they are very good at this task.
This is due to two reasons. On the one hand, psychopaths objectify people , which means that they do not perceive them so much as beings with their own mental life with which they can empathize, but rather as very complex robots or characters in a video game. This characteristic is present in different intensities depending on the psychopath: some of them completely objectify others, while others only do so to a significantly greater degree than the average of the population.
On the other hand, the reification makes you feel no qualms about lying and manipulating The only concern when doing so will be that it is not discovered that one is doing something socially frowned upon, but beyond this there will hardly be any moral limitations that make the behavior of the psychopath who manipulates or lies seem unsafe due to an internal struggle.
In other words, in people with a high degree of psychopathy, lies can flow like water, and saying something that is not true can pose the same moral challenges as snapping your fingers.
This means that psychopaths have a very wide range of action when it comes to pretending to be something they are not, which means that they have more advantages when it comes to seducing and get someone to fall in love with them through deception All this, moreover, without the need to train in lying.
Detecting the weaknesses of others
In addition to having the ability to offer a completely unrealistic side to themselves, psychopaths have another ace up their sleeve when it comes to navigating the world of romantic relationships by cheating: They are very skilled at detecting psychological vulnerabilities in others
This means that this type of people have a surprising ability to know what kind of actions and initiatives may be appreciated by someone, whether due to certain shortcomings or fears and insecurities.
For example, in research it was found that people who obtained high scores on a psychopathy scale were able to intuitively detect who had suffered sexual abuse in the past… just watching how they walked This did not occur in people who did not obtain significantly high levels on that test.
In this way, psychopaths start with a type of privileged information about the weaknesses of others that they can use to their own benefit by offering elements that others need and that they rarely find in other potential partners. Although it may sound cruel, using intimate information to make yourself more desirable can be something that works when it comes to seducing.
So far we have seen the seductive potential that psychopaths are capable of offering through a mask that hides their propensity for manipulation; that is, in cases where the couple is not fully aware of their lover’s psychological singularities.
However, even in cases where the person with a high degree of psychopathy has become accustomed to acting violently, it is possible to feel attracted to this fact. When aggressiveness is articulated in a rational way in pursuit of an end, it can appear hybristophilia, which is sexual attraction to violent people willing to commit crimes
Especially if the person with psychopathic traits is male, the fit between this aggressiveness and masculine gender roles contributes to this tendency to harm others being seen as an expression of manliness and autonomy.
However, hybristophilia is very rare and certainly does not occur in all people. That does not mean, however, that certain degrees of hostility and aggressiveness cannot be used to find a partner.
The dark thriad and love
Even if aggressiveness and hostility do not take the form of crimes, for many people they can be more attractive than peaceful character; in fact, a concept known as dark thriad, which has often been related to a pattern of sexual preference for narcissistic, manipulative men with a tendency toward psychopathy.
Why is this happening? It is difficult to find a rational logic beyond the possibility that certain people may be predisposed to feel attracted to extremely individualistic people, whose paradigm is psychopaths
From an evolutionary perspective, it is reasonable to assume that some individuals’ genes predispose them to seek the company of this class of personalities, given that in certain contexts having offspring with people of this class can increase the chances of successfully passing on the genes.
