Trust is a term we often use to describe and justify everything. On many occasions, using trust or distrust with or towards a person can generate misunderstandings, since different definitions are usually used depending on the area in which you grew up or the culture in which you grew up.
Trust is the belief that a person or group will want to act in the way we expect in a given situation. Therefore, it will be more or less reinforced depending on the actions and values. In short, we can say that trust is built. So, what could have happened to make your partner not trust you? Why don’t you trust? What can you do to gain more confidence? If you are interested in answering these questions, in this PsychologyFor article we answer your question about why my partner doesn’t trust me and what to do
How to know if your partner distrusts you
If you still have doubts about whether your partner distrusts you, here are some signs that can help you resolve them:
- He looks at your phone secretly.
- He asks you several times about a specific topic, showing that he is not sure if what you answer is true.
- Check what you spend money on or where you have been.
- Monitor what you do through your friends’ social networks to see if you are telling the truth.
- He accuses you for no reason.
- You argue frequently. Everything seems to lead to a problem or argument.
- Start making more plans without you as a “punishment”
- He doesn’t share his feelings or vulnerabilities with you, present or past.
Why doesn’t my partner trust me?
The most frequent reasons why mistrust arises in a couple are deception and infidelity These situations alter the expectation of trust, causing distrust to gain ground in the relationship and causing the person to no longer believe you when you tell them what you feel, what you are going to do or what you would like for the future.
When infidelities appear, everything that person had believed about you and how you were or what you did, shakes and stops making sense. If you find yourself in this unpleasant situation, in this article you will see how to act in the event of infidelity.
What to do if my partner doesn’t trust me
Feelings of trust quickly turn into distrust, but the reverse does not happen in the same way. When someone trusts a person, he may doubt for a few moments, without it having to imply complete distrust. On the contrary, a person who distrusts the other increases intolerance and uncertainty, installing doubt in the relationship.
So what do you do when a person doesn’t trust you? Just because mistrust exists does not mean that all is lost. Below, we show you some methods or tricks that you can use to make your partner trust you again:
- Share time together : It is in these moments when the person once again discovers what kind of person they have next to them. Spending time will help you feel calmer, that is, it will promote familiarity, transforming what has become unknown to us into known.
- Take an interest in their needs and try to cover them so that he can trust you again, as long as it falls within your limits and you see it as acceptable.
- It is necessary to take risks : Trust implies taking a risk that, if you do not want to take it, will be very difficult to overcome.
- Do not avoid confrontation : seeks the negotiation of new conditions and uses an appropriate resolution in situations where conflict arises.
- Give details again and share intimate moments as a couple little by little.
- Be willing to change and create new agreements in the relationship.
In this article, we show you more information about how to overcome distrust in your partner.
What to say to my partner when he doesn’t trust me
In these situations, it is important that you convey the following messages:
- Let him know how you feel and what you think about the situation that has brought you here.
- Try to provide a space in which to talk calmly.
- Ask him what he needs to trust you again and if he wants to do it.
- Be transparent with your partner.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Why my partner doesn’t trust me and what to do we recommend that you enter our Couples Therapy category.
Bibliography
- Bravo, MJS, & Serrano, MCE (2011). Trust-mistrust in the marital relationships of transnational couples. Prospective: Journal of Social Work and Social Intervention(16), 225-256.
- Kelly, J., (January 12, 2020). 7 signs that your partner doesn’t trust you, according to a relationship expert. Business insider.