The way in which our baby learns will depend largely on his or her feeling of security, which will be conditioned by the quality of emotional relationships from birth.
When your little newborn comes into the world, he is still unaware that he has a body and a mind with which to express and think. Just as your body grows, your perceptions, thoughts and emotions will also develop as you receive stimulation from your environment.
As soon as he was born emotional world It is based on sensations of pleasure and displeasure. During your first three months your emotional communication will be based on these two reactions. He cries if he feels any kind of discomfort or discomfort and appears calm if he feels comfortable. The baby will focus all of her energy on feeling her basic needs met (food, sleep, temperature…). It is very important that we adults ensure that the baby feels satisfied and also provide him with a warm and affectionate environment in which he feels safe. From this feeling of security, her curiosity will develop to explore and learn about the environment around her. Research by authors such as Spitz, Harlow, and Bowlby have shown that a baby who is not provided with an emotional and warm bond will not feel safe, will not develop curiosity, and will consequently withdraw into himself, tending to protect himself from his environment. .
Around three months you will notice how your little one begins to interact more with you, he begins to smile intentionally when he sees your smiling faces, when he hears your affectionate tone of voice. What he initially did reflexively is transformed into increasingly intentional behaviors, that is, governed by his own will. The baby begins to realize that can have effects on its environment. The process of understanding the cause-effect relationship appears. In such a way that he will begin to use his smile and cooing to indicate his well-being and will express his crying to inform that there is something he does not like.
Why is the attitude of adults important for the development of babies?
It is very important adult feedback to motivate their curiosity to communicate and continue learning, that is, we encourage the baby to continue communicating when we respond to their expressions, even if we do not know exactly what they want to communicate to us. We parents usually say: “it seems like he wants this or that; so, when the child shows concern, we say: “you’re so sleepy, right?…or you’re so hungry, right?…”. These questions or expressions addressed to the baby that seem insignificant have a crucial importance because we are attributing intentionality to their manifestations or behaviors. Whether or not they have intentionality at that moment, after these questions we leave a pause that encourages the baby to respond in their jargon, it can than with more crying, a smile or cooing, depending on their state. We are outlining the outline of the dialogue, where one listens while the other responds. We encourage the baby to feel included in that dialogue, even if we do not understand him, he can perceive that he We listen, that we will pause waiting for your response. And the baby feels that he is an active part in the communication and that his cries, smiles or vocalizations are important because they are heard, that he himself is important in his family environment, we are building the pillars rudimentary aspects of our baby’s self-esteem. This will motivate his interest in communicating, first with his closest environment, his parents and the people who care for him daily, then he will open up to the rest of the world.
The way our baby learns will depend largely on his feeling of security which will be conditioned by the quality of the emotional relationships established in their early years.
Between four and six months it begins to manifest a special relationship or bond with the people who care for their needs on a daily basis, who are generally their parents. This emotional bond is called attachment. The type of attachment we establish with our baby will powerfully influence the way she learns, the way she relates to her environment and the development of her personality characteristics. It is important to know our own personality characteristics, the child’s temperament, and her way of reacting to facilitate establishing a foundation of secure attachment. Knowing the child’s temperament helps us respect her rhythm without forcing her. There are babies who respond quickly and spontaneously to minimal contact, others require more time or may even reject the interaction if they feel excessively stimulated.
By seven months the intensity of attachment increases showing a preference for the company of the people with whom they have established this bond, and the child may show signs of concern or fear when separated from their attachment figures and suspicious reactions towards strangers.
The child is already a tireless explorer of your environment. He knows how to express a wide range of emotions: pleasure, affection, anger, strangeness, demand, sadness, fear, etc. Progressively, the manifestation of emotions will become more complex and will be accompanied by more expressive gestures. For example, he will show his anger by throwing things, hitting him with his hand, or walking away from the person who provoked him. He will express affection with tenderness, warm gestures, such as smiling, kisses and hugs.
At the end of the year of life the child will begin to include any word to help you express emotions. Around the age of two, there will be an explosion of oral language that will become a tool that will help the child express increasingly complex emotions and feelings.
Recognize and respond empathically to child’s needs It will help enhance your emotional growth. This includes having emotional availability, dedicating quality time in which the child feels cared for, listened to and accepted. Cared for, by dedicating exclusive time to interact with him (it is not worth carrying out several tasks at the same time, for example, giving him a bottle while talking on the phone).
Listened, by placing our eyes on his gaze while he tries to communicate something to us (it is not worth trying to understand him while he is looking for us with his gaze and we are looking away). Accepted, by respecting their times of communication and expression of emotions (it is not worth rushing him or anticipating his answers, speaking for him or downplaying what he tells us or even ridiculing his expressions).
However, we should not confuse this quality of care With the establishment of limits, both aspects can and must be combined and are not opposed. It can be as wrong not to dedicate this quality attention as to make the child the exclusive center of attention, anticipating and responding immediately to his or her demands. It will be beneficial for your emotional development if you learn to accept the times and needs of others and the small frustrations that, adapted to your level of development, will shape another important aspect of your emotional repertoire, the ability to resist frustration, which will help you. It will help, among other things, to be persistent in achieving your goals or objectives.
