Psychological violence, also known as emotional or mental abuse, is a form of mistreatment that harms a person’s emotional well-being and self-worth. Unlike physical violence, psychological abuse often leaves no visible marks, making it more difficult to recognize. Yet, its consequences can be equally devastating and long-lasting.
In this article, we will explore what psychological violence is, how it manifests, and provide 12 detailed examples to help you identify and understand this harmful behavior.
What is psychological violence
Psychological violence refers to a pattern of behavior that aims to control, manipulate, intimidate, or belittle another person. It can occur in various settings, including romantic relationships, families, workplaces, schools, and social groups.
Its core components include:
- Emotional manipulation
- Verbal aggression
- Social isolation
- Gaslighting or distortion of reality
- Threats and intimidation
Victims of psychological violence may suffer from anxiety, depression, loss of self-esteem, sleep disorders, and even post-traumatic stress.
Before diving headlong into the different examples of psychological violence, it is necessary that we stop to understand in depth the implications of this phenomenon. Psychological violence, also called psychological abuse or emotional abuse, is a behavior by which a person tries to subdue or humiliate another through various practices that do not require physical aggression.
This type of behavior can generate different psychological consequences in the victim, from symptoms of anxiety and/or depression, to post-traumatic stress disorder. There are many examples of psychological violence that could generate these consequences. Logically, depending on their frequency and intensity, as well as the characteristics of the victim, the traumas will be more or less serious.
Emotional abuse addresses so many situations that it is difficult to give a more exact definition. What professionals are clear about is that these behaviors usually involve three situations, which are the psychological aggression itself, its denial or minimization, which generates a second form of victimization in the attacked person, by not recognizing themselves the damage suffered.
Before beginning to list the different examples of psychological violence that can occur, we will learn more information about this phenomenon. As in all attacks, this situation is based on an imbalance, whereby the aggressor takes a position of power over the victim, which is subordinated and forced to act under its control.
Although this type of behavior can occur in any context, there are somewhere it is more common for us to find examples of psychological violence. Some of them are the families themselves, logically, where this emotional abuse from one member of the couple towards the other, or towards the children, could occur. In some cases, it can even come from children to parents.
Likewise, children can receive psychological violence from other children, and in fact this frequently occurs. Elderly people can also become victims of psychological attacks, whether by a family member or even their caregivers.
Of course, another scenario where it is easiest to find examples of psychological violence is undoubtedly that of work. Although it is a problem against which we are increasingly trying to act, workplace harassment, which can lead to emotional abuse, is still common for many people, who are victims of this behavior by their superiors or even other colleagues.
12 Examples of Psychological Violence
Here are twelve examples of psychological violence, each with a brief explanation to illustrate how it works and why it is harmful:
1. Gaslighting
Gaslighting is a manipulative tactic in which the abuser causes the victim to doubt their own perceptions, memories, or sanity. This can involve denying events, twisting facts, or insisting the victim is overreacting.
Example: “That never happened—you’re imagining things.”
2. Constant Criticism
Relentless negative comments, often disguised as “helpful feedback,” aim to tear down the victim’s confidence and make them feel inadequate.
Example: “You can’t do anything right. Why do I even bother asking for your help?”
3. Threats of Abandonment or Harm
Using threats to control the victim—whether threatening to leave, harm themselves, or hurt others—is a form of emotional coercion.
Example: “If you leave me, I don’t know what I’ll do to myself.”
4. Controlling Behavior
Trying to dictate every aspect of the victim’s life, including what they wear, who they see, or what they do, is a form of psychological domination.
Example: “I don’t want you going out with your friends anymore. You should be spending time with me.”
5. Humiliation in Private or Public
Regularly putting someone down, mocking them, or making fun of them in front of others can severely damage their sense of worth.
Example: Laughing at someone’s opinions during a family gathering and calling them “stupid.”
6. Social Isolation
The abuser may try to isolate the victim from family and friends to make them more dependent and easier to control.
Example: “Your family doesn’t really care about you—they just want to control you like they always have.”
7. Blame Shifting
The abuser refuses to take responsibility for their actions and instead blames the victim for everything that goes wrong.
Example: “I wouldn’t have gotten angry if you hadn’t provoked me.”
8. Silent Treatment
Withholding communication as a form of punishment or manipulation can leave the victim feeling confused, rejected, or desperate.
Example: Ignoring someone for days after a disagreement, refusing to explain why.
9. Jealousy and Accusations
Constant, unfounded accusations of cheating or disloyalty are used to control and instill guilt.
Example: “I saw how you looked at him—you’ve been flirting behind my back, haven’t you?”
10. Dismissing Emotions
Telling someone that their feelings are invalid, exaggerated, or irrational is a form of emotional invalidation.
Example: “You’re too sensitive. Stop crying over nothing.”
11. Creating a Climate of Fear
Using intimidation—yelling, slamming doors, or aggressive gestures—to make the victim feel unsafe or on edge.
Example: Standing very close during arguments and yelling to assert dominance.
12. Manipulating Guilt
Using guilt to control someone’s actions, especially by making them feel responsible for the abuser’s happiness or well-being.
Example: “After everything I’ve done for you, this is how you repay me?”
This behavior can be subtle or overt, but its purpose is always to gain power and control over another person.
Psychological violence often develops gradually, making it harder to recognize. Over time, victims may internalize the abuse, believing they are at fault or deserving of mistreatment. Identifying these patterns is the first step toward regaining autonomy and seeking help.
If You Recognize These Signs…
If you or someone you know is experiencing psychological violence, it is essential to reach out for help. Support can come from:
- Mental health professionals
- Trusted family or friends
- Domestic abuse helplines or support organizations
No one deserves to be emotionally manipulated or controlled. Recognizing the signs is a powerful act of self-awareness that can lead to healing and change.
FAQs about Examples of Psychological Violence
Is psychological violence a crime?
In many countries, psychological or emotional abuse is recognized by law, especially in the context of domestic violence. While it may not always lead to legal charges on its own, it can be used as evidence of a broader pattern of abuse.
How is psychological violence different from physical violence?
Physical violence involves bodily harm, while psychological violence targets a person’s emotions, thoughts, and sense of self-worth. Both are forms of abuse and can cause long-lasting damage.
Can psychological violence happen in friendships or the workplace?
Yes. Psychological violence is not limited to romantic relationships—it can occur between friends, coworkers, family members, and others where power dynamics are at play.
What are the long-term effects of psychological abuse?
Victims may develop chronic anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and trust issues. Some may struggle with emotional regulation or develop difficulty forming healthy relationships.
How can someone recover from psychological violence?
Recovery often involves therapy, rebuilding self-esteem, setting boundaries, and reconnecting with a supportive social network. Professional help is strongly recommended for healing and moving forward.