How To Deal With The Stress Of Not Getting Pregnant?
Although the first image that usually comes to mind when we think about a pregnancy is that of a mother with her partner, united and happy while waiting for a child, this does not fit what tends to happen in reality. . And such idealization does not illustrate the prelude to motherhood, what precedes pregnancy: the moment of pondering what consequences deciding to have a son or daughter could entail before taking the step.
This process is not rosy, since it requires weighing different issues such as weighing to what extent the arrival of the new boy or girl will modify the daily life of their parents, how it will affect their jobs, their hobbies or even their economy.
In this way, this perspective brings to light the contradictions that are part of the process of planning to become parents and that, however, are not illustrated in the romantic image that we pointed out previously. Once these difficulties have been overcome, among the invisible problems that couples may encounter when finally taking the step of looking for a boy or girl, specifically mothers, is feeling high levels of stress when not getting pregnant despite wanting to. In this article we will develop the different aspects that this topic includes.
Not being able to get pregnant and its relationship with stress
Firstly, it is important to note that there is vast scientific literature on the relationship between the experience of having difficulties getting pregnant and stress. The studies tend to focus on infertility – which does not mean that all people who have difficulties conceiving a child are infertile – but they are nevertheless research that emphasizes the following idea: the obstacles that these couples go through are more beyond infertility as a medical condition. In other words, Not being able to have a child is an experience that deeply affects the person’s life on a psychological level and on their relationship.
This is because the impossibility of starting a new stage in one’s life implies the frustration of a personal and shared project for the future, giving rise to uncertainty and new insecurities; In short, making this situation a stressful experience.
Furthermore, stress is not reduced to the exclusive fact of not getting pregnant but to the treatments that exist for infertility if there is one. It’s no news how painful this process can be for a couple. In general terms, couples who find it difficult to have children have an increased level of anxiety, it has negative effects on the relationship and sexual functioning of the couple, as well as a decrease in the self-esteem of both. On the other hand, studies generally agree that Women tend to perceive greater stress from the infertility experience than men even when the diagnosis is not directly attributed to them.
This could be based on the fact that there is still a strong mandate that dictates the it must be mother within Western societies, which substantially harms not only women who have difficulties getting pregnant but also those who do not want it.
What to do if you are stressed about not conceiving a baby?
Something important to clarify is that feeling stressed in this situation is completely normal and expected. In itself, stress is normal, since if we did not have the ability to perceive a threat or danger in the environment around us, we would not be able to make decisions in accordance with the circumstances we face. In fact, It is also expected that the couple will present other types of emotional responses, such as anxiety, fear or sadness because of the obstacles that are standing between them and the project they want to carry out.
The important thing is not that the situation does not affect them, but that the way they cope with the stress they put into play is sufficient to accept the situation that generates discomfort. It is vitally important to take this into account since currently, from scientific psychology, it is not possible to affirm that emotional or psychological conflicts have a causal relationship with infertility; But what is within people’s field of action is to put into practice different ways of dealing with this stressful situation. Furthermore, putting stress coping strategies into practice can not only help you make more conscious decisions, but it has been shown that they can improve the well-being perceived by both parents and prolong the duration of infertility treatments.
Techniques to deal with stress
At this point, it is essential to emphasize how important empathy and mutual accompaniment of the couple are, as well as the closeness of the family and friendship network or the support of a mental health professional. For our part, and in line with the above, we propose a series of stress coping techniques for critical moments What a woman can experience by not getting pregnant.
