How To Create A Good Relationship With Your Ex After Separation?
After a breakup, the common narrative presents the ex as an enemy to avoid. However, on many occasions, relationships end for reasons such as incompatibility or lack of communication, not because of malice on the part of one of the parties. In these cases, it is possible to build a healthy and respectful relationship with the person who was once an important part of your life.
In this article, We will share some keys to creating a better relationship since separation, so that you can heal the wounds of the past and build a new bond based on respect, understanding and maturity. Keep reading and discover how to iron out rough edges, establish clear boundaries, and foster effective communication to achieve a cordial and enriching relationship with your ex.
Many wish that life was like the movie “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind”, that once a relationship breaks up there is no trace or memory of your ex. However, life does not and does not have to work that way.
Without wishing to romanticize any type of abuse, there are situations in which it is possible to have a good relationship with that person who was so important to you. This is vital, especially if there are children involved, but it is also possible when there are not.
Maintaining a cordial relationship with your ex-partner can be beneficial for both of you, as long as clear boundaries and honest, respectful communication are established. The key is, in part, to overcome the resentment and pain of the breakup, and focus on building a new type of relationship based on maturity and mutual respect. How do you know if it is possible to get along with your ex? We will share with you some indicators that a good relationship with your ex-partner is possible:
If you answered yes to most of these situations, don’t be afraid to explore the possibility of building a new relationship with your ex-partner. Below, we will share some keys that could help you in the process.
Keys to having a better relationship with your ex-partner
Getting over a breakup and establishing a healthy relationship with your ex can be a challenging process, but not impossible. It requires maturity, honest communication, and a commitment on both sides to put mutual respect and well-being first. Here are some keys that can help you navigate this process:
1. Set clear boundaries
Defining clear boundaries is essential to avoid misunderstandings and establish realistic expectations in communication with your ex-partner, in order to create a better relationship since the separation. Consider the needs and discomforts of both of you and reach a consensus on aspects such as the frequency of contact, topics of conversation, and spaces you will share. Remember that boundaries can change over time, as long as there is open and honest communication.
2. Unleash romantic ties
Although affection and respect for your ex-partner may persist, it is important to prevent deep emotional ties from interfering with the new dynamics of the relationship. If you still feel more than friendship for your ex, it is important that you reflect on your situation and establish an appropriate emotional distance for both of you.
Walking away from your ex-partner does not mean becoming his or her enemy. In fact, maintaining a healthy distance is often vital to moving forward with your life and healing the wounds of the breakup. The duration of this space will depend on the needs of each one. For some, eliminating contact on social media will be enough, while others will require months of zero contact. The important thing is to find a balance that allows for healing and personal growth.
4. Avoid acting like a couple
The relationship has ended and with it the dynamics of a couple. It is important to avoid behaviors that may generate confusion or false expectations. Remember that your ex-partner now has her own life and so do you. Respect individual spaces and avoid getting involved in aspects of each other’s lives that no longer concern you.
5. Refrain from unhealthy behaviors
After a breakup, it is common to experience emotions such as pain, anger or frustration. However, It is important to prevent these emotions from translating into negative behaviors such as control, manipulation or jealousy. Identify these patterns and find healthy strategies to manage them.
6. Clarify ambiguities
It’s important to have an honest and open conversation about the expectations you both have for the relationship after the breakup. What type of communication will they maintain? Will they share social spaces or activities? Clarifying these doubts from the beginning will help avoid misunderstandings and future conflicts.
7. Work on forgiveness (while possible)
Forgiving your ex-partner does not mean forgetting what happened before the separation. It is a personal process that allows you to free yourself from resentment and negativity, and thus move towards a healthier and calmer relationship. Forgiveness also involves wishing your ex-partner well-being, even if they do not have a close relationship.
In the event that you manage to establish a friendship with your ex-partner, remember that this will be a different friendship than the one you had before. It is important to respect each other’s new spaces and relationships. If your ex-partner begins a new romantic relationship, you may need to distance yourself to respect both people and avoid conflicts.
The route to building a good relationship with your ex-partner depends on you. There is no manual on what to do or what not to do that works for everyone. However, whatever the case, it is a path that, when followed, requires patience, commitment and maturity on both sides. Everything ready to start walking?
