The expression “being immature” is a label that is very commonly used to describe those people who in some of their vital areas do not function in a coherent, competent or stable way.
Although this type of personal functioning is maladaptive, it does not exist as a specific category in the current classification system of mental disorders, the DSM-V. However, this behavioral and attitudinal style may present underlyingly as a common element in various personality disorders.
Yes indeed; in the same way that we can talk, using everyday language, about immature people, it is also possible to talk about psychologically mature people Let’s see what characterizes them.
For the psychiatrist and expert Enrique Rojas (2001) there are three areas to which the so-called state of personal maturity can be limited: the emotional, the intellectual and the professional. In the author’s terms, maturity is a state of knowledge and good judgment, prudence and knowing, which has been achieved and which leads to positively managing one’s own psychology. In this way, a person who is in this state has an adequate level of capacity to lead his or her life competently and effectively on an emotional level.
A key aspect is to understand this construct as a dynamic process, a phenomenon that does not have a specific purpose or destiny, but rather is constantly and permanently modulated throughout the life cycle. Therefore, the idea that there is a perfect and ideal degree of personal maturity to reach and maintain in a static way must be banished.
When reference is made to the neuroanatomical development of the different structures and connections that make up the human brain countless research has shown how the areas of the frontal lobes play a central role in behavior linked to decision-making, the ability to plan future events, and flexibility when carrying out complex reasoning in resolution. of problems and improvise and adopt adaptive or flexible behavior, etc.
These competencies seem closely linked to the definition indicated above of what a mature personal style entails; They are the abilities that give human beings such a category and differentiate them from other less intellectually developed animal species.
Scientific studies have determined that these frontal areas They do not reach their full development until well into the third decade of life, approximately at 25 years old. Furthermore, the studies that have based the knowledge we have today about the concept of emotional intelligence, also closely linked to the question of personal maturity, affirm how determining the neuronal circuitry established between the frontal lobe and the structures of the system is. limbic, whose function is the regulation of emotional states.
Broadly speaking, it can be said that the latter is responsible for controlling the most instinctive physiological responses of stress, anger or fear and intervenes in motivational processes and in learning more complex behaviors and prepared based on past experiences. In contrast, the orbitofrontal area modulates feelings analytically and gives orders on how to proceed behaviorally when information is received from the limbic system as the individual is experiencing a certain emotional state. Failures in the connections between both areas cause thoughtless, excessive and socially maladaptive responses.
A classic example that explains this phenomenon is found in the literature that founded the development of neuroscience as such: the case of Phineas Gage (1948), a foreman who worked in railroad construction and who suffered serious personality alterations after a impressive accident in which a metal rod completely pierced his brain in the front.
Main characteristics of psychologically mature people
What has been exposed so far seems to indicate a great relationship between the constructs of personal maturity, competence in emotional regulation and the affective world in general. In this sense, individuals who enjoy a good level of maturity in the field of feelings They perform skillfully in the following skills (Rojas, 2001):
1. Know the nature of the emotional world
That is, psychologically mature people are capable of observe themselves and associate situations or events with emotional experiences
2. Establish solid foundations in the sentimental area
This quality refers to the fact of having experienced the feeling of love in its depth and know the implications and necessary commitments for the maintenance of such a loving relationship.
3. Have a realistic vision of the couple
Avoiding idealizations and biased perceptions of others is essential. Having too high expectations of the relationship and the other member of the couple makes it difficult to positively resolve adversities or disagreements that may arise between them.
4. Consider the other person and the relationship as just another part of life
Emotional independence from others is very closely linked to a good level of self-esteem and self-confidence, a fundamental fact in establishing healthy interpersonal relationships
5. Understand the dynamic nature of emotions and feelings
This implies considering that these phenomena are mutable and modifiable over time and that it is necessary to carry out daily actions and behaviors that constantly feed them positively.
6. Be able to give and receive love in a healthy way
This point implies having the ability to communicate affection with verbalizations and actions, as well as being aware that this fact is part of human nature. Indeed, a mature person understands that she is intrinsically deserving of affection from the other person and therefore you wish to reciprocate this in the same way.
7. Be prepared to build a common project with another person
Mainly, this aspect implies sharing areas of one’s life with another individual in a satisfactory way and also having the competence and commitment to want to solve possible conflicts that may arise in the course of it.
8. Have sufficient qualities of intelligence, will and commitment
These three qualities imply the ability to find the balance between achieving one’s own life goals and those common to the couple. The latter must be shared by both members voluntarily, so effective communication between the two parties becomes a fundamental and necessary aspect.
9. Maintain the feeling of love for the long term
It is important to be aware that it is positive not to fall into a succession of superficial phases of falling in love. This point is very closely linked to the previous one. regarding the level of commitment necessary so that said sentimental project has satisfactory continuity.
10. Self-regulate
Finally, it is important to internalize that oneself you can learn to internally regulate your emotions and feelings Closely related to the first point, a mature individual is capable of not getting carried away by his emotions and is competent at identifying, communicating and analyzing them rationally in order to achieve a more adaptive final behavior.
In conclusion
It has been observed throughout the text that, broadly speaking, a psychologically mature person possesses the qualities of emotional intelligence; sense of commitment, responsibility and effort; a rational and regulated style of functioning (intra and interpersonal) where the world of emotions is balanced with respect to the world of cognition ; and, finally, a sufficient degree of ethical and moral behavior.
In addition, aspects such as having a good level of competence in one’s own knowledge, where strengths and weaknesses are assumed, are also relevant ingredients; an adequate ability to analyze, reflect and make decisions coherently and based on solid arguments; and a positive development of self-image in which emotional independence from the other is the main component.
