The 5 Phases To Overcome The Grief Of The Breakup Of A Couple

Overcoming heartbreak and breaking up with the person we love is not easy There are many good moments that we leave behind, and the emotional torrent that this situation generates makes us experience this moment as the end of the world.

Generally, one of the two members of the relationship is the one who decides to leave, and although it may seem like they are the one who suffers the least, that is not always the case. There are relationships that end but love remains alive Something that complicates the transition to a new life without the loved one.

It is not easy to accept the breakup

And of course, when we reach the point of leaving everything we have experienced behind, there are many memories that hit our minds again and again. Certainly, It is not easy to accept that the situation has come to an end that the other person will rebuild their life without us and everything they experienced will be left behind never to return.

Emotional pain can be even more devastating than physical pain, and some individuals become hooked on their partner as if it were a drug. In fact, love and drugs use the same neural circuits so psychologists recommend not having contact with the other person (at least for a while) to avoid relapses.

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Heartbreak is not a linear process

And if!, relapses are common in heartbreak since it is not a linear process What I mean by this? Well, there are ups and downs. There are several phases of heartbreak that are overcome over time, but it is possible to return to the previous stages when we see the loved one again.

That’s why Experts affirm that in heartbreak, as with drugs, the best thing is “all or nothing.” At least if we want to avoid suffering for longer and avoid relapses that can lead to a greater sense of failure and greater conflicts with the ex-partner.

Time becomes a great ally for heartbreak

When we stop seeing the person we love, the neural circuits that are involved in this phenomenon weaken, and the levels of neurochemicals such as dopamine, serotonin, norepinephrine, among others, stabilize. Over time, the body will adapt to the change and it is possible to return to normal.

Having said that, There are people who have serious difficulties in overcoming these situations, because different problems (his low self-esteem, his poor social skills…) make his recovery difficult. In these cases, it is necessary to go to a psychologist specialized in this topic, and it is important to avoid the administration of drugs, since it is necessary to acquire realistic beliefs about relationships, improve relationship skills with others, or learn to love oneself. same.

The phases of a love breakup

But what are the phases of heartbreak that exist? What are their characteristics?

There are five stages of heartbreak and the last step is acceptance. Each person experiences the stages in their own way and the time to overcome will depend on many factors. For example, the intensity of the feeling, the length of the relationship or previous experiences of heartbreak.

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These are the phases of heartbreak:

1. Denial and isolation phase

This phase It is characterized because the person denies reality and acts as if everything continued the same (both of them together) It is a generally brief stage, which usually occurs as a form of protection, since the impact of the breakup is so great that it is difficult to assimilate it. At this stage it is important for the individual to be aware of the emotions he feels and the reason why they are there. You need to see the situation in the most objective way to gain more clarity.

2. Anger phase

This phase is characterized because The person feels very strong rage and anger towards the person who has left them If in the previous phase the person did not want to accept reality, now he feels tremendous frustration about what has happened and blames the other person for the couple’s ills. Then revenge usually appears. Sometimes, it also happens that, in this situation, anger is directed towards oneself or the people around one (and even towards the entire world).

3. Negotiation phase

This phase can be really dangerous if not managed well, since in an attempt to accept the situation and approach the other person again, you can make the mistake of trying to do anything to recover the relationship. A bad approach can ruin the situation again, and even make it worse.

4. Depression phase

In this stage the person loses hope of recovering that person they have really loved You begin to be objective and realize that there is no going back. So you feel really saddened by the loss of someone who was so special to him or her.

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5. Acceptance phase

After the sadness of the previous phase, the person begins to visualize a new future Accept that the relationship is over and that what could not be, will not be. You no longer seek to be with the other person and you feel at peace and ready to meet a new partner.

Heartbreak can be overcome

As we have seen, our psyche is prepared to be able to accept and overcome a breakup. Anyway, There are some cases in which pain and bad sensations are difficult to assimilate and this can lead to some type of psychological disorder.

If you think you are in a risky situation, do not hesitate to contact a professional.