Why can lack of desire occur within a relationship? What are the main reasons for little intimacy in a couple? Find out how to address this problem.
Research indicates that sexual satisfaction plays a key role in healthy relationships. Although all relationships go through times where transience is lower, if this ends up being part of the routine it may indicate that there is a problem that should be solved. Feel that you partner does not want you It can end up causing you feelings of frustration and even affect your self-esteem. But why might your partner avoid you sexually?
Why doesn’t my partner want me?
There are different reasons why a person may be uninterested in sex within a relationship. Some of the most common are the following:
- Relationship problems: If you are experiencing a relationship crisis or, on the other hand, if there are conflicts that have not been resolved within the relationship, this can result in a lack of sex in the couple, thus. This may be due to the anger or frustration they may feel because an issue that is damaging the relationship has not been properly addressed. In these cases, you should focus on improving the couple’s communication and try to express how you feel to face this problem.
- Stress: As there are more responsibilities, people can end up seeing their sexual desire harmed. Stress in many cases can cause us to end up overthinking and overanalyzing, which can translate into always being in a bad mood or anxious. This can end up affecting your sexual life with your partner.
- Health problems : Illnesses and medications can also play a role in desire. In fact, some conditions such as diabetes and heart disease can affect sexual functioning and libido. On the other hand, some drugs can dampen sexual desire and the ability to respond sexually. That is, if you feel that you partner does not want you perhaps it is due to the effects of an illness or because of a drug.
- Natural changes: Most people tend to expect to feel spontaneous sexual desire, but as we get older and get used to our partners, this may occur less frequently. Therefore, sometimes, it is important to create the opportunities instead of waiting for this desire.
- Anxiety or ruminative thoughts: The lack of sex in the couple It may also be due to feelings of anxiety. Worrying too much can make us have our mind somewhere else and not in the here and now, creating few moments of intimacy with our partner.
- Boredom: Longer relationships usually end up establishing a routine with sex. That is, trying to make things more ‘efficient’. This can end up being boring and cause you to become a sexless couple.
As we see, there is no single answer why you partner may not want intimacy For this reason, if you feel that the lack of sex in the relationship is a problem for you, it is important that you talk about it with him or her instead of imagining fictitious worst-case scenarios. Experiencing problems in sex is completely normal, so you should not feel bad if you are going through a less active period.
On the other hand, there are people who believe that couples without sex are hopeless. In fact, many people tend to relate lack of sex with relationship failure You must keep in mind that low intimacy does not have to indicate that your bond is over.
What should I do if I don’t feel desired by my partner?
If this situation is affecting your self-esteem or the bond you have with your partner, you should try to confront the problem from different perspectives. Some tips that you can keep in mind to do so are the following:
- Talk about it and listen carefully: The first and most important step is to talk about it with your partner. Discussing what could be happening will help you identify the root of the problem. Sometimes communicating in these aspects can make people feel guilty or ashamed, so it is advisable to adopt a positive attitude to try to understand what is happening.
- Address relationship problems: In many cases, lack of desire within a relationship It is usually linked to problems that have not been addressed, but continue to damage the bond. Faced with these problems, you must learn to talk about what is making it difficult for the couple to get closer without blaming or judging the other, that is, always from your perspective and feelings. Think of yourselves as a team and not as rivals.
- Look for common goals: Be willing to talk about everything that happens when there is intimacy. Additionally, you can suggest ways to get out of the routine and try something different. This will help you reactivate your desire.
- Analyze how it is affecting you: As we have mentioned, the lack of desire in the couple It may be related to stress or anxiety due to our standard of living. If this is your case, perhaps it would be useful for you to understand how these problems may be affecting the relationship and analyze how to overcome these difficulties.
If you feel that you partner does not want you , don’t try to jump to conclusions. Instead, try to assume that we can all go through bad times or good times, and that the key is to try to work together to reach a mutual agreement or to face this situation as a team. These challenges are an opportunity to get to know each other and get closer between the couple.