Few behaviors can be as unhealthy as jealousy, which causes a serious relationship problem and can end a relationship. Although relationships are complicated in themselves, they are even more so when there is no trust between the two members.
Jealousy is harmful and can degrade relationships until causing rupture as well as great discomfort. This discomfort not only affects the person who is the victim of jealousy, but also the jealous person.
Jealousy can be considered feelings of insecurity and anguish that hijack the attention of the jealous person. To a certain extent they are normal, because no one likes to lose someone they love.
However, when the person is unable to control these feelings and jealousy causes so much suffering that it endangers a love relationship. We are talking about unhealthy jealousy, which we explain more about in the article “Unhealthy jealousy: 10 common signs of extremely jealous people.”
The first step to overcoming jealousy is to be aware of it. Therefore, if you are jealous, in the following lines we wanted to highlight some actions that you should not carry out when you are jealous.
They say that the jealous person does not think evil because of what he sees but because of what he imagines. When a person feels insecure, he may link things that are not actually linked, or to suspect something without even verifying the veracity of their beliefs Therefore, it is necessary that you detect when you lose your nerve and observe if the reason why you lose them is real or is the fruit of your imagination.
2. Don’t accuse him
When a person is jealous, the first reaction is anger, and even though there is no firm evidence to confirm the reason for your jealousy, By entering into an unhealthy dynamic, the jealous person may even accuse another person unfairly Therefore, it is necessary to be realistic, and before letting these toxic feelings invade you, you must be as objective as possible.
3. Do not prohibit
Overly jealous people They adopt controlling behaviors over their partner: telling you how to dress, who you should go with, etc. No one is going to be with you out of obligation, so this behavior will only cause the love relationship to become toxic.
4. Don’t become a detective
Insecurity leads a person to become obsessed with having control over their partner, but also wanting to know what they do at all hours. For example, a jealous individual may want to know what his or her partner is doing through their social networks. There are people who even use the partner account without their behavior. This behavior is not healthy and in addition to hurting the victim of jealousy, it also hurts the jealous person.
Impulsivity can appear at any time when the jealous person is not able to control their own emotions.
6. Don’t call at all hours
This impulsivity problem also causes the jealous person to want to know what the partner does at all hours. And, in fact, in most cases, this He’s already on the defensive before even speaking, so their attitude can be very aggressive. It is not good to be aware of your partner 24 hours a day.
7. Don’t leave your life aside
The previous point is an example of how in a relationship in which distrust and jealousy predominate, obsession makes an appearance. This happens because jealousy They appear due to low self-esteem and insecurity, and the jealous person is afraid of feeling abandoned. To overcome jealousy, the best alternative is to work on yourself.
How to stop being a jealous person
Taking into account the previous points, how is it possible to stop being a jealous person?
1. Recognize that you are jealous
The previous points are examples of what a jealous person does, therefore, Detecting them is the beginning to be able to get out of this complex situation Do you behave as in the previous points? Then you need to look for a solution, even with professional help if necessary.
2. Do your part
Jealousy is a normal feeling to some extent. But some people, despite feeling that way, do their part to keep the situation from getting out of hand. This is key to avoid entering a vicious circle that harms both actors in the love relationship. If you want to change, the only one who can do it is you
Sometimes the emotions we feel cloud us, but we must be emotionally intelligent and be objective about how we behave in certain situations with our partner.
4. Work on yourself
As I have already said, jealousy is often a consequence of low self-esteem and insecurity. For this reason, it is necessary that, in the interest of leaving jealousy behind, people with this problem must work on their own personal development. When someone is happy with the life they have, not looking for someone to fill this void but someone who adds.
5. Improve communication
Improving communication with your partner is the best way to overcome jealousy, as this avoids many conflicts and prevents misinterpretations. Communicating correctly with your partner can increase trust between both, because in this way each one knows the needs of the other and it is possible to negotiate for the good of both.
