Tests of love do not have to consist of things that we demand of the other to show how much you believe in the relationship. In any case, they can be understood as something much more constructive: a way of knowing, in an approximate way, if the emotional bond that unites two people is strong or if, on the contrary, what keeps a couple together has nothing to do with it. see with that.
Below we will see a proposed list of love tests so that, all of them accurately, they can be used on a daily basis. What it is about is observing the couple’s relationship and stop to consider whether there are emotions between two people that make us think of a shared and exciting project.
Love is always complicated, but we can make it a little simpler. Specifically, we have several options to know, roughly, when a relationship has solid foundations and when it does not.
And there are many ways in which a relationship can be created in which the emotional bond is weak or almost non-existent. Let’s think, for example, of unassertive people who are afraid to say no so as not to upset others. When a relationship begins, it is possible that even though the love is not reciprocated, the decision not to continue giving false hope is not faced.
We have another example in manipulative people who start dating someone out of interest. In these cases, the relationship is based on someone trying by all means to make the other person practically addicted to the relationship, and to do so he uses falsehoods and deceptions that fuel emotional blackmail.
Finally, something much simpler can also happen: that love ends but the routine and habits linked to the relationship continue to be perpetuated. In these cases, the feeling for the other can be confused with the fear of ending an entire lifestyle.
Love tests to evaluate the strength of relationships
To detect these undesirable situations as soon as possible, and in the absence of couples therapy, there is nothing like resorting to some love tests.
1. He doesn’t mind showing his love to others
There are many people who are very reluctant to show their feelings of tenderness to friends or other family members, but that does not mean that this cannot change in some situation. And… if being with your partner is not enough of an excuse to show your most affectionate side to others, what is?
At first It is difficult to let go and offer clear signs of affection to the other person Yes, there are more people watching, but at the end of the day, the pleasure of sharing those moments should more than compensate for the discomfort of others seeing us through different eyes. Expressing feelings is not a crime.
2. Show an even-tempered attitude
Many people believe that tests of love consist of carrying out all kinds of pampering on their own initiative, from bringing breakfast in bed to letting the other person always choose the restaurant in which to dine. However, this does not have to be the case, and in fact it is something perfectly consistent with the behavior of a manipulative person or a couple who feels guilty and “exchanges” those small sacrifices for moments in which they fall into infidelity.
On the other hand, one of the best tests of love consists of combine these pampering with moments in which you communicate assertively what are your own interests. Ultimately, a boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife is not a child, and treating the other as if they were a minor implies denying their status as an adult and responsible person. In those cases, one is living an illusion.
3. Invest effort in listening
One of the situations in which it is most noticeable if the relationship is based on love and empathy is in conversations. It is in these moments when the only thing we should pay attention to is the other’s point of view. Not their physical contact or their livelihoods, but their words and their speech. Talking face to face means opening a window into the other’s mental world means active listening.
Thus, conversations and face-to-face dialogue situations are one of the best tests of love: if there is an interest in the mental characteristics of our partner, this is noticeable in our attitude, our non-verbal language, and the presence or absence of impatience for him to finish speaking. Paying attention to this regularly is very useful, although we must keep in mind that tiredness can also create distractions not caused by a lack of love.
4. Open conversations regularly
What do we do when we love someone passionately? As minimum, think about that person very often And, in these times, a good way to intuit how often this happens is the number of conversations on the phone and social networks that our partner initiates.
Excessiveness is always bad, of course, and constantly texting indicates that something is not right (possibly jealousy or mistrust), but the relative absence of attempts to make contact during the time in which you are not in the same place is reason to ask if everything is okay. Which brings us to the next point.
5. Ask how you feel
A relationship is not simply a part of life in which to invest time and resources. It is also a place where we go to pay attention to others, to see to what extent we can be of help. That is why something as simple as asking “how are you feeling?” It is such a powerful tool and, on the other hand, a token of love.
6. It is not difficult for him to apologize
Even in the most perfect couples, mistakes abound. That is why, when they appear from the other person, it is good to pay attention to whether they apologize, and the way in which they do it. After all, If pride outweighs the desire to make the other person feel better Something is wrong in that relationship.
