Discouragement In The Digital Age: How To Overcome It In A Stable Way

Discouragement in the digital age: how to overcome it in a stable way

Feeling discouraged, demotivated or reluctance is an increasingly common unpleasant and limiting experience. If a few decades ago discouragement affected us at certain times in our lives and was more sporadic and less intense, today it happens to the vast majority of people at some point and sometimes persists for too long.

However… Is there any biological cause for discouragement?

Why do we get depressed or discouraged?

The human being is prepared to survive and to live through well-being. If we feel so discouraged today it is because there is something in our way of living and managing our emotions that is failing. This is where the digital age comes into play: we live in a world of over-information and technological addiction that causes us anxiety and, over time, discouragement. It affects our memory, attention, and generates more and more stress.

This also makes it difficult for us in our relationships, especially as a couple, and is an aggravating factor in cases of ruptures. How can we overcome discouragement in these complex times?

In this article we are going to delve into what discouragement really is (since it is not the main cause of the problem), how it relates to the digital age and how you can start solving it today.

What I am going to tell you is based on my direct experience as a psychologist and coach accompanying people in their change and therapy processes, where people who were very affected by discouragement over the months or years managed to resolve this difficulty (in human empowerment. com you can read their testimonials). Let’s go for it.

The meaning of discouragement

To understand what happens to us we first have to reflect on it. Discouragement is an unpleasant emotional state that leads us to paralysis, demotivation and in some cases distrust, and that is born from an idea: it is not worth living experiences, new or not. Discouragement leads to exhaustion and lack of interest.

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However, as we talked about above, today there is no biological explanation in Psychology or Neuroscience for continued discouragement or depression. Feeling discouraged at certain times in our lives may have meaning, but feeling it recurrently is neither functional nor useful.

For this reason, discouragement is not the main root of the problem but a consequence. At the same time, trying to focus and solve the problem with medication or chemical help will not be a safe solution either. As we know, problems of continued discouragement are not solved with drugs but with therapy (whether or not there is the use of drugs according to a diagnosis).

There are three specific causes of discouragement and they are as follows.

The 3 main causes of discouragement (and depression)

Human beings can live with a state of continued discouragement for three main reasons.

The first reason is living with anxiety for too long. Anxiety is an unpleasant mood linked to fear that makes us alert, leads to rapid breathing and causes physical problems (stomach upset, sleeping problems, intrusive thoughts, etc.).

When anxiety exists for too long, it leads us to discouragement as a defense system.

The second cause is living too long according to a routine that does not cause us satisfaction, but rather stress and exhaustion (here technological addiction plays a fundamental role).

The third cause is when our well-being and self-esteem It depends too much on external factors that we cannot control (how others behave, how they validate us, if we live with too many expectations, demands or comparisons).

One of these factors or a combination of them leads us to constant discouragement. What do you think could be your case?

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Relationship between discouragement and technological addiction

What role does the digital age play in this problem?

We live in a digital age plagued by over-information, which works in a consumerist and materialist way. In turn, both social networks and smartphones work according to an addictive mechanism, since they offer us constant content that implies an ephemeral stimulus. This constant use leads us to anxiety and difficulties with attention and concentration.

We have been living with this constant use of technology for a very short time, which has been installed in our lives without control or awareness on our part. Technological addiction, due to the anxiety and exhaustion it causes, leads us towards discouragement or intensifies other difficulties (such as relationships or breakups).

How can we solve discouragement considering our current context? Let’s find solutions.

Solve discouragement from your own personal learning

Discouragement is often sold as a chronic problem from which we cannot free ourselves, but rather learn to live with it. However, as we talked about, there is no biological explanation for continued discouragement. Therefore, It is a psychological and emotional difficulty that we can solve if we go deeper and apply concrete changes.

In some cases the change comes sooner than expected and other times more patience and work is necessary. In any case, the problem is solved if we take these factors into account.

Go to the root of discouragement

If discouragement is not the root of the problem, we must work with the real cause that leads you towards discouragement. Is it anxiety? Is it about how you build self-esteem? Perhaps the way relationships are approached or interpreted? (for example: if you validate yourself through relationships, you build them in a dependent way or through overprotection).

In the first phases of a change process we delve into what is happening and how you manage what you feel to discover that root and work on it, which is much more effective than treating discouragement superficially.

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Create a well-being bubble

So that technological addiction does not harm us, we need to become aware of it, decide what our priorities are and create a bubble that does not isolate us from the world, but rather integrates us into it without losing our well-being. In this case it is not about stopping using technology, but about using it consciously without getting caught up in its constant use.

Comprehensive work with your personality

It is also necessary to work with all parts of your personality: self-esteem, belief system, communication, relationships, emotion management, values ​​and even identity.

When we stay superficial (the problem you feel now or the discouragement itself) we run the risk of the problem recurring over time… To solve what is happening to you, we are not looking for patches, but rather a profound change that is internalized and helps you in a stable way.

A process of change and learning

To overcome discouragement in a stable way we need not only to delve into the causes, but also to apply concrete changes and stabilize the improvement over time. For this reason, accompanying with occasional sessions is usually not entirely effective. This is the reason why my way of accompanying is more constant. It can be with daily consultations and without limit. In this way, we can work with difficulties when they occur and thus find solutions at all times.

Also it is necessary to work with all parts of the personality, learn to manage our mood and make the change stick. Having a concrete action plan also helps us achieve the changes we need. If you want to solve the problem 100% and need constant and committed company, at Human Empowerment you can find the option to schedule a session with me and begin to resolve what is happening to you.

I send you lots of encouragement, enthusiasm and commitment,

Rubén Camacho Psychologist and coach