Emotional Flooding: What It Is, How It Affects Us And How To Deal With It
Everyone has been immersed in a situation where emotions and feelings have flowed uncontrollably. Whether it’s anger in an argument, crying because someone told us something we didn’t like, or frustration because things don’t go as planned, the truth is that we can experience a real emotional flood.
We drown in our own feelings. The flame of rationality goes out when it is flooded by a tempestuous emotional tidal wave. Reason and emotion are usually balanced, but when this situation is lost we can feel very bad and make poor decisions.
Emotional flooding is a situation that everyone has felt on more than one occasion, something very human but also very dysfunctional if not managed properly. Below we will discover why and we will also see some strategies to calm ourselves when it occurs.
The emotional flood has a name that shows off what it represents. It is precisely that, a flood, a wave of sensations, of mostly negative emotions that take control over ourselves and prevent us from thinking clearly It is as if a huge wave of intense emotions were dragging us without being able to escape, like the swimmer who is trapped by currents and gales in his beach dip.
Our body manifests tension physically. The muscles tense, the internal temperature rises, the stomach turns and many other organic sensations are felt. But, of course, the nature of this tension is not exclusively physical. Our mind, flooded by emotions, isolates itself from what is happening around us. Negative thoughts become very vivid, their mental volume increases. They deafen us with a noise that comes from our minds.
Emotional floods They are very common psycho-emotional experiences in interactions with any person They are especially frequent in the middle of a relationship, but they can also occur with friends and, above all, with family, a source of emotional support but, at the same time, of conflicts and misunderstandings. Each person is trapped by their own thoughts and emotions such as indignation, frustration or anger. Our feelings become so intense that it is impossible to listen calmly and serenely to what others have to tell us.
The emotional flood is nothing more than another example of how our emotions, uncontrolled, can completely block our rationality. The problem with this very human phenomenon is that, if we do not stop it when it occurs and try to regain composure, We may decide things or say many other things that, cold, we will end up regretting Emotional flooding affects our decision making.
Causes: Why do we feel this way?
At this point you may wonder if emotional flooding is something pathological. The truth is It is a completely human and normal phenomenon, which even the most calm and rational people in the world can experience The reason for this is simple: no matter how much we believe it, there are no rational people and emotional people, but we are all a combination of both components.
In fact, there are many situations in which we make rational use of emotions, in addition to the inverse relationship, in the sense that reason is not completely independent of emotionality. The point is that everything has a balance, a point at which reason and emotion come together so that we make the most logical decisions but without disregarding what our hearts tell us.
In addition to this, it should be said that emotional flooding may be related to our sense of survival It has been hypothesized that it is an involuntary reflex that is activated when the brain detects some stimulus perceived as threatening, whether rational or irrational. Our emotions have an adaptive functionality, they are a product of evolution, and they help us cope with the demands of the environment.
When you experience something that is understood as an injustice, lie or harm, this can be the trigger for the entire wave of negative emotions that shape the emotional flood. Emotions such as fear, disappointment, sadness, anxiety, anger and others will not only manifest themselves in the form of psychological discomfort for those who have them, but also initiate a whole set of physiological changes
The problem with emotional flooding is that this reason-emotion balance is lost, causing all types of emotional states to emerge for a moment that blind our judgment and prevent us from thinking. It is something that every human being who has found themselves in an emotionally stressful situation will have experienced, which is why it is not pathological in and of itself. However, it does require putting in some effort to prevent the emotional escalation from escalating and harming our mental health.
Scientific research indicates that in order to control situations of emotional flooding, it is key to manage the level of activation of two areas that are highly involved during the occurrence of this phenomenon: the amygdala and prefrontal activity
The amygdala is a brain structure that, apart from other functions, plays an important role in emotionality, while the prefrontal area is related to the famous executive functions, such as concentration, decision making, working memory, planning… When the amygdala is overactivated, emotions intensify and our rational and reflective capacity is reduced.
Therefore, taking all this into account, the ideal would be manage to reduce the activity of the amygdala and increase that of the prefrontal cortex to manage and avoid these emotional floods
What can we do to control it?
As we have seen, emotional flooding would be that process of emotional overflow in which every iota of rationality is silenced by the escalating intensity of our emotions. There are several strategies that we can resort to to control the emotional flood.
1. Take some time off
Continuing with the metaphor of the sea, The emotional flood can be understood as waves that trap us, that threaten to drown us with the water up to our necks The best thing we can do in these cases is try to swim to the shore, catch our breath and calm down, away from those threatening waves at the beginning.
To prevent our emotions from overwhelming us or, if they have already occurred, try to reduce them, one of the best things we can do is take a break by moving away from the emotionally tense situation. Each person requires their time, but as a suggestion, about 20 minutes is fine enough to regain composure and calm.
A classic in any recommendation to calm our emotions is deep breathing It is not a miracle cure, but it helps prevent our tension from escalating and can calm us down in a few minutes.
Deep breathing can reduce our tension load, remove stress and recover our concentration and rationality.
3. Dialogue with yourself
Trying to reflect is complicated when we are drowning in an emotional flood. Therefore, it is appropriate to do it once we are better, calmer, enjoying physical and mental calm. The balance between our emotions and our reason allows us to reflect on our desires, experiences and feelings in a lucid and holistic way.
Talking to ourselves is a good way to discover what has caused us to feel so emotionally tense and what we could do to avoid it. This dialogue we can do it with a Socratic conversation asking ourselves questions like the following.
Where does this frustration come from? Am I being realistic about what causes it? Am I exaggerating things?
Are my thoughts realistic? What justifies them? Does the way I react make me feel better or worse?
What could I do to change this situation?
Most of us have many distorted thoughts about reality, which are fueled by our negative emotions. It is necessary to detect them and question them, rationalize them to the point of removing the emotional filter that distorts or exaggerates them.
Related article: “Cognition: definition, main processes and operation”
4. Reevaluate stressful situations
By reassessing stressful situations we can induce a cognitive change that aims to understand what has happened to us so that, the next time it happens, we can exercise greater emotional control To achieve this, it is essential to know ourselves better and know what the triggers of our emotional flooding are.
