Famous or Successful Children, Synonymous with Narcissism?

Children who stand out for some ability can end up becoming narcissistic people. Below I explain what to do to prevent this from happening.

We continually see children or adolescents on television who achieve success and fame They stand out for some ability, whether it is for playing soccer very well, for singing or for being the children of well-known people. At first we may think that this success is something positive for them, but it is also true that many of these children end up being people in the future. arrogant and selfish What is happening to them? How can it be avoided?

The lack of respect that Justin Bieber has for his fans is well known. A photo was recently published in which the singer was seen from a balcony spitting at his/her followers. This could be an example of how fame can “go to your head.”

Now, it is not true that early fame is linked to a narcissistic personality There are cases where it can be like this, but not necessarily. We know that narcissism is a personality trait, a exaggerated admiration that the person feels for themselves, highlights and enjoys their qualities and virtues and is little aware of their defects. They tend to ignore and even ridicule others and look “over their shoulder”, minimizing any other feat. Sometimes they can value what others do, but if they compare themselves, they always consider themselves better than the rest.

If we take into account that personality is forged and strengthened in adolescence and early adulthood, people who develop great fame early are vulnerable to narcissism, egocentrism and lack of empathy.

How can this be avoided?

I have focused on children who develop fame, but these tips can be applied to any family in which there is a child who behaves in an arrogant, self-centered and disrespectful way.

1. Try to be objective with your child: It is chilling to hear parents say very naturally “before my child is abused, I prefer that he be the abuser.” It is very important to value the positive things that your child does, that will give him/her a greater self-esteem, but it is also important to point out mistakes and fight for improvement. If this is not done, the child will not self-criticism and therefore, will tend to blame what happens on others
2. Teach him values: There are parents who leave all education to the schools and there are things that are not taught in the classroom. It is very important that through play the child learns to put himself in the place of others, listen to opinions, lend toys, learn to work as a team and not always get his own way, that is, learn what frustration tolerance
3. Help him listen to his emotions: Normally these types of children do not listen to their internal world. They become materialistic and excessively rational. Talk about your own emotions, often serving as a model helps children learn to do the same. It is not only about being affectionate with your child, but also talking about emotions, since if it becomes a taboo subject, he/she will learn to reject them, ignore them and therefore, avoid feeling negative emotions in the future. (which is impossible and will generate great pain that you will not be able to express, since we all feel sadness, helplessness, anger, etc.).
4. Teach him to be responsible: Just because your child has a quality that makes him or her stand out does not mean that that is enough. It is important that you understand that there are responsibilities that should not be left aside and that in life there are obligations. Thus, it is important that you study, do your homework, do not miss class if it is not justified, and do certain tasks at home.
5. Let him have fun with other things: In the same way that obligation is important, it is also important to dedicate time to being with your family and doing hobbies. If you like football, not everything can be football. You also have to dedicate time to your family, to play other things and to allow yourself to be a child.

In conclusion I would like to say that the key lies in allow children to remain children the time they need. If they become adults too early, deficiencies of some kind will appear.

Encarni Muñoz Silva

Health psychologist 16918