There are many parents who decide to go to a specialist when they begin to see that their children do not accept having a problem with an addiction This is because many young people who use drugs or alcohol do not consider it a problem but simply see it as something they do for fun and that they can stop whenever they want.
It doesn’t matter how much you talk to them, and it doesn’t matter how worried they seem, because the addict will always reaffirm his position that what he does is not a problem, he will even take refuge in the Manichean argument that the only thing he does is What happens is that parents try to control their lives and everything they do. He is not able to admit that there is a problem, and a serious one.
“No, I’m not addicted.”
One of the most common and common symptoms that an addiction exists is precisely its denial. It occurs when the person cannot see or recognize that this situation is occurring. The reason is that, at first, he does not see that there is any change, so in his eyes, what he does is something harmless : a drink from time to time, a joint when you go out with friends… This makes you think that you have absolute control of the situation, when in reality that is not the case.
This first phase of addiction It is called the pre-contemplation stage In it, the addict is not yet aware of the real problem, and, therefore, does not consider that anything needs to be done about it.
To make a positive change in a person’s life, you need to be able to see reality. In most cases, this is difficult because the addict tends to not want to believe that something negative is happening. However, those who are aware of their situation and who have the opportunity and willingness to change tend to achieve better results than those who remain unaware of it. And the worst of all is that at this stage of addiction there is little that the rest of us can do for the addict.
The contemplation phase
The contemplation phase is the stage in which the individual decides that they want to change their behavior and live a life without addiction This phase usually begins when the addict realizes that he has a problem with drinking, drugs or any other substance or behavior. This is the point where you can start working towards detoxification.
However, even though at this point the addict already knows that something is happening, he still does not decide to change the situation even though he is aware that it is not going well.
It is an objective of any therapy to help the person reach this stage of contemplation, as it means taking the first step towards confronting the addiction. Parents, friends and family can help a lot to achieve this although it can be very complicated.
What can we do in this situation as parents?
There are many different treatments available to help addicts. Of course, you can never give the same treatment to two different addicts, because Each person has their problems and their way of dealing with them It depends on the individual’s personal needs and what they want their life to be like at the end of treatment.
The treatments are based on theoretical models that have demonstrated their effectiveness, although each professional approaches the therapies in a different way, based on each person.
Two concepts to take into account: reactance and freedom
Within addiction there are two important concepts, reactance and the freedom of the addict.
When we talk about reactance, we are referring to the possibility that the person feels under pressure or forced to do something This will result in it doing the opposite of what it is supposed to do. Keep in mind that, in general, no one likes to be told what to do, how to behave, so imagine if you are dealing with an addict. Therefore, it is best to avoid excessive pressure or confrontations and orders that have to do with addiction.
The concept of freedom is closely related to what we have talked about before. We don’t want to feel like nothing or anyone is pressuring us, and that we have free will. For that reason, To help an addict be aware of their situation, we must give them space, but at the same time, show them the reality A good idea, helping him reflect and express himself.
Despite everything we have talked about, there is a harsh reality that it is not easy to show that an addiction exists. Very often it is a process that lasts over time, and at times it can be downright frustrating.