We tend to take for granted that we know each other well. However, the truth is that many people live without really knowing each other. They are true strangers to themselves. Maybe they know what their favorite flavor or color is but they are not able to elucidate their main weakness, or their deepest fears. And, although we do not like to admit it, the reality is that we do not know more than we know about ourselves.
Do you know where your fear of heights or the dark comes from? Do you know what your talents are? Have you ever thought about what really makes you anxious? Many of us would not be able to honestly answer these questions. Knowing yourself is much more complicated than we think. In the words of Saint-Exupèry: “You will judge yourself. It’s the most difficult. It is much harder to judge yourself than it is to judge others. If you manage to judge yourself well, it is because you are truly wise.”
However, if we want to solve our conflicts, overcome our internal barriers and grow as people, we must undertake a journey within ourselves. A journey of self-knowledge that allows us to discover who we really are or what we want for our life and to help us fully accept ourselves with our lights and shadows.
Many of us spend much of our lives on autopilot. We make our decisions below the radar of our conscience without questioning what we think or feel at every moment. This helps us simplify our daily lives and saves us a huge amount of energy. The problem arises when We operate on autopilot for so long that we are not even aware of our behaviors, thoughts, and emotions. Then, we lose control over them; They start to control us.
However, we could avoid this if we were only able to look inward from time to time. Self-knowledge is not only vital to understand ourselves better, to glimpse why we act in a certain way or why we feel one emotion and not another, but it It allows us to make better decisions and focus on those objectives that will help us build the life we want. Basically, it helps us stop living reactively and start living proactively.
And through that lifelong journey of introspection, we learn to accept ourselves as we are, and we embrace our strengths and those shadows that we don’t like as much but that are also part of us. We learn to take charge of our lives and assume responsibility for our well-being and happiness, being aware that, although we cannot choose circumstances, we can decide how to respond to them. Thus, we stop wasting precious energy on the things we cannot change to focus on those that really make a difference.
Knowing ourselves also allows us to become aware of negative habits or toxic environments that are harming us and discover the skills we need to develop to become the people we want to be. When we have exhaustive self-knowledge, We learn to live with purpose and intention and give meaning to our existence. In this way, we will be able to discern the essential from the superfluous and be clear about our values to follow the path we have chosen.
Of course, the path of self-knowledge is unique. Each person lives this journey of inner discovery in a different way. However, regardless of the way you live it, throughout that journey you may need different psychological tools to delve into the depths of yourself, discover your deepest “self” and begin to heal your wounds. In this sense, psychological therapy can become an excellent ally to guide you throughout the path and provide you with the appropriate resources.
5 Ways Therapy Helps You Know Yourself
Self-knowledge is one of the pending subjects in our lives. For this reason, many psychotherapy sessions dedicate time to promoting introspection and self-knowledge. An essential stage in which you will not only be able to learn to know and accept yourself, but you will also be able to grow as a person as you are able to analyze your weaknesses, recognize your strengths and develop your self-confidence. In this sense, therapy will give you the tools to achieve the following.
1. Make your emotions aware
We all experience emotions, but we are not always able to accurately recognize them and name them. In this way, we can end up living on an emotional roller coaster that, sooner or later, will cause imbalances. The good news is that with the tools that therapy gives you, you will be able to become aware of your emotions and understand how they influence your thoughts and behaviors as well as the influence that your ideas and behaviors have on your emotional states.
You will also learn to pay attention and interpret the physical reactions that generate those emotions, from the unpleasant sensation of having a lump in the throat to that tickling in the stomach, pressure in the chest or a galloping sensation of heat. And, after this work of introspection, you will be able to begin to understand why you feel those emotions and not others, and what is the cause that causes them, the first step to learning to manage them better.
2. Reflect on your thoughts
We are what we think. Our thoughts have greater power over us than we realize. They can give us the motivation we need to take action and achieve our dreams or, on the contrary, make us believe that we are not good enough to try. The worst thing is that many times we are not even aware of those thoughts that, in some cases, have been with us for decades.
In these cases, having some introspection tools can help you reflect on your thoughts and discover those internal barriers that prevent you from developing. In addition, it will help you detect where they come from, why they have penetrated so deeply into you, and how they are influencing your mental stability. This way, you can start working to eliminate them and include more positive ideas in their place.
3. Identify your beliefs and stereotypes
We all get carried away by beliefs and stereotypes in our daily lives. Within seconds of meeting someone, even without having said a word, we already have a theory about who they are. This It can guide us the way when we find ourselves in unknown territory, but it can also become an obstacle to our development.
Ultimately, this mass of irrational beliefs and ideas ends up guiding our decisions and behaviors.
Fortunately, when you have the appropriate resources that therapy provides, you are able to detect these beliefs and stereotypes. You will realize that many of them you have learned as a child, others have been instilled in you by society and there will be some that you have shaped yourself based on your experiences in the past. Learn to identify them and realize how limiting they are. It is essential so that you can rethink them and adopt a more positive perspective.
4. Rethink everything you take for granted
As we get older, we lose that curiosity we felt as children and we stop asking ourselves questions. Thus, we also stop questioning what is happening around us and within ourselves, and we begin to accept everything passively. At that precise moment, our critical thinking turns off and we begin to live on autopilot. However, When we start therapy and begin to rediscover ourselves, we recover that lost curiosity.
In this way, you will begin to ask yourself new questions, and your possibilities, which were previously very limited, will become practically infinite. You will become a freer and more creative person because you will finally understand that even though you have always done something one way, it does not mean that it is the only possible way. These questions will be a sign that you begin to break with established limits and begin to see things from another perspective.
You may be interested: “The 10 types of values: principles that govern our lives”
5. Make your goals and priorities clear
We all have priorities and goals in life, but it is important to have them clear or we risk moving away from them with every wind of change. Or even worse, other people decide for us and determine what we should do with our lives. There will always be someone willing to tell us what to do and how.
However, when you have the right tools that therapy gives you and you start to look inside yourself, You are able to discover what you really want to do and your priorities will take shape. This is the first step to regain control of your life and begin to take responsibility for your decisions.
Traveling inside yourself is perhaps one of the most complicated journeys that await you in life, but as you discover that “I” that lives inside you, many things will begin to make sense and you will feel increasingly motivated. to look inside yourself. The first step to begin to resolve all your conflicts and begin to transform into the person you want to be.
