How To Act With A Person Who Despises You? The Causes Behind This Attitude
Why might some people treat you with contempt? What is hidden behind this attitude? Discover how to deal with contempt within a relationship.
ANDl contempt in relationships It can appear in different ways: in the form of sarcasm, ridicule and even malicious smoke. All of this only makes the relationship more and more damaged, in addition to affecting the other person’s self-esteem or well-being. In fact, treating your partner or anyone with contempt will only lead to more conflict or even ending up disconnecting from the other person. But what to do about this attitude?
When we talk about despise a personwe are pointing to different attitudes that can make the other feel inferior or with a lack of capabilities. So, unlike having complaints about a partner’s actions, this goes a step further and involves treating criticism in a derogatory way.
In many cases, contempt involves having negative thoughts about a partner or person for a long period. Therefore, if there are attitudes or examples of contempt in your relationship, it is very likely that there are conflicts that you must resolve.
My partner treats me with contempt: why is it dangerous?
We must take into account thatContempt is very dangerous in relationships since it destroys all the foundations of respect, affection and admiration within a bond. This is because contempt puts your partner as an opponent instead of forming a team in which you both value each other.
In the long term, when there is a contemptuous attitude within a relationshipthis can end up leading to a defensive and negative attitude on the part of the other person. In addition, it can end up affecting the person psychologically, since it can have an influence on our self-esteem.
What is behind the contempt? Signs It’s Ruining Your Bond
There are some signs that could indicate that contempt is damaging your relationship, friendship or family. When this happens, it may mean that you feel less affection, admiration, or even respect for your partner. That is, you begin to not enjoy or value their opinion. Taking this into account, some of the examples of contempt that can occur in a link are the following:
Disrespect: Not treating a person with respect involves both physical and verbal signs. For example, it may mean that there is no benefit of the doubt and that these people end up interpreting the intentions and behaviors of the other in a very negative way. These attitudes can end up implying a loss of trust, admiration and appreciation towards the other.
Competence: Instead of seeing the other person as an ally, you see them as competition. This is synonymous with trying to gain power or surpass the other person in different areas of life, such as work, family, finances, etc. In fact, if the other person has something to celebrate, they are very likely to resent, minimize, or ignore this fact.
Constant criticism: If criticism and corrections predominate in a relationship, this can end up generating a dynamic in which one speaks condescendingly or there is criticism of the other person’s character or personality. This can lead to a lack of feeling of freedom or authenticity within the relationship.
Disrespectful body language: Making faces or transmitting negative body language to your partner or to a person while speaking is an attitude of contempt that can end up causing discomfort to the other person. Even acts like paying more attention to the phone while talking to the other person can be a gesture of contempt.
These are some of the attitudes or words that can indicate that someone is treating with contempt. Taking this into account, it is important that you begin to face this situation properly and setting limits.
How to act with a person who despises you?
You can try face contempt that you receive with others taking into account the following advice:
Start with small changes: Instead of starting to act more defensively about the other person’s behavior, try talking about it. If there is an attitude, behavior or words that have made you feel that the other person is putting you down, always point it out by speaking from your feelings and emotions.
Don’t act defensively: One of the first reactions that may appear when a person treats you with contempt is to act defensively. Instead of having this first reaction, try to understand why the other person reacts this way to you.
Cultivate affection and admiration: These two attitudes and feelings are one of the bases you need to make your relationship improve in many aspects. In the face of an attitude of contempt, make yourself valued and above all, remind the person of all the love and admiration that you show each other. This may also mean spending more time caring for the relationship and bond.
Go to therapy: In many cases, contempt means that there are behaviors that can harm us. If you feel that you cannot handle this situation and it is limiting you, it is important that you go to a professional psychologist.
If both people are motivated and willing to improve the relationship, it is likely that the contempt, with work, will end up disappearing. In fact, the contempt should not be present in no healthy bond.
