How to Learn to Distinguish Between Emotions and Feelings

Know how to distinguish between emotions and feelings It is one of the most important parts of developing Emotional Intelligence.

Understanding the nature and characteristics of these psychological phenomena helps us better understand ourselves and others, and better modulate our mental states.

What are emotions and feelings?

Let’s start with the basic definitions to understand what emotions and feelings are.

Emotions are considered changes in the physical state of the body, with modifications in both the release of hormones and neurotransmitters in the nervous system, which predisposes us to react in a certain way to the stimuli generated by a specific situation. That is, they arise from stimuli that, once they have been “registered” in the body, activate certain mechanisms in the body, and these increase the likelihood that we will behave in a specific way. For example, when approaching a cliff, our senses (especially sight) create fear in us that drives us to react quickly by moving away from that danger zone, the edge of a drop of several dozen meters.

Instead, Feelings are affective states that arise from our interpretation of what is going on in our heads, whether they are mental representations of what is happening around us, memories, or imagined situations. Therefore, it is often said that feelings shape emotions when we are aware of them and interpret them in a specific way.

So that… What comes first, the emotion or the feeling? The most accurate answer is that both and at the same time neither. It would be very intuitive to assume that since emotions arise from the most primitive structures of our neuroendocrine system, they enter the scene earlier, but in reality they are constantly influenced by feelings practically from the moment we have the ability to think, which is why a circle of constant interaction between both elements.

The keys to distinguishing between emotions and feelings in everyday life

These are the main key ideas to keep in mind to learn to distinguish between feelings and emotions.

1. Emotions arise beyond consciousness

As we have seen, emotions emerge from mechanisms closely linked to the general functioning of the organism. That’s why, They exist independently of our consciousness, being present in all kinds of animals

On the other hand, from the beginning we are much more aware of the feelings we experience, although that does not mean that it is easy to understand them.

2. Emotions are universal

Another distinctive characteristic of emotions is that they are universal, that is, they exist in the same way in human beings of all cultures, and are reflected as such in spontaneous facial expressions. Besides, All human beings recognize and identify well the facial expressions associated with each emotion

3. Microexpressions reflect emotions more than feelings

Since emotions have deep roots in our evolution, the muscles of our face reflect them very well, so we communicate them unconsciously and automatically. Instead, feelings are expressed more consciously and through cultural filters as movements whose meaning has been agreed upon in advance.

4. Feelings are harder to understand

Since feelings are very varied (because they are a mixture of many abstract psychological processes and depend on the characteristics of each culture), it is more difficult to identify them and know their scope

On the other hand, emotions are more predictable and, since there are fewer of them and we have adaptations to quickly recognize them (also in others, detecting subtle changes in facial expressions), we are better at recognizing them.

5. We have a greater ability to regulate feelings

Finally, another key to distinguishing between emotions and feelings that have more practical applications is the fact that human beings have more possibilities of controlling and managing the latter than the former.

This is due to something we have already seen: Emotions emerge from automatic physical changes beyond our control that take place throughout our body, while feelings are products of the interaction of abstract thoughts guided, in part, through our will. We decide to feed one idea or another, reflect on something, explore the implications of a belief or a hypothesis about reality, etc.

It is true that we also have a certain margin of maneuver to manage emotions, but it is always in a more indirect way than the way we do it with feelings: we must create contexts and situations that affect the rhythm of our heart, our breathing, the degree to which our senses receive stimuli, etc. And the results we obtain with this type of strategies are more imprecise. That’s why It is recommended to modify emotions through feelings since in this way greater stability is achieved in the mental state achieved, by starting with what we can handle voluntarily and influencing the visceral from there, giving consistency to the emotion-feeling-emotion cycle.

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