It is clear that the evolution of new technologies is causing our way of relating to each other to change… for better or worse.
Yes, it is true that now It is possible to talk to many people every day regardless of where they are, and it is also true that the existence of the Internet has allowed us to make friends with people whose country of residence we never even have to set foot in. The possibilities of creating bridges are much greater thanks to chats and video calling services, but this has a disadvantage. It is also much easier to cut contact with someone immediately and definitively, in a matter of seconds or a few minutes.
Ghosting is precisely what happens when someone decides to stop talking and interacting in general with someone without giving any explanation, simply not answering the message or even preventing them from contacting someone who ignores them, blocking them on social networks, etc In this article we will see several tips on how to react to ghosting and not make it hurt us more than necessary.
What to do if I am ghosted?
To know how to manage the emotions that arise when experiencing ghosting, follow these tips. Keep in mind, however, that each case of ghosting is different, and many times The type of relationship with the person matters more that he has stopped talking to us than the fact that he is ignoring us.
1. Assess whether there was a significant emotional bond
It is good to keep in mind that, just as in the era of social networks it is easy to ghost, it is also easy to mistake for friendship what never was. Knowing how to distinguish between friends and acquaintances that orbit around the social circles in which we move is not always an easy task.
Therefore, consider first If there is any reason why it makes sense for you to feel bad because a certain person ghosted you. Perhaps she simply did not see reasons to have regular conversations with you, not so much because of who you are, but because she knows you little or the circumstances in which you found out about each other did not allow for the development of a friendship.
Although it is clear that ghosting is an inconsiderate act and can hardly be excused, it is also true that we do not necessarily have to give much importance to each and every case in which it occurs. Sometimes just Just take note and stop worrying about what that person says or does
2. Could you have personal problems?
If the person who has stopped communicating with you is significant to you, the next thing you need to do is try to find out if they are deliberately ignoring you or if there are certain personal or family problems that cause so much discomfort or demand so much of them that in general He has suspended his social life.
In some extreme cases this is possible, although it is not very common. Someone who, due to personal circumstances, cannot dedicate time to cultivating relationships Those who care about them tend to warn that they will be there for a while without giving too many signs of life, out of consideration and respect. But under certain circumstances, such as experiencing strong depressive symptoms, even writing a message can become too exhausting.
In any case, since ghosting has been imposed, our ability to know what is happening is very limited, so eventually, unless we have important clues that indicate otherwise, we must end the search and accept the conclusion. simplest and most likely: that the other person does not want to communicate with us for some reason.
3. You don’t let guilt appear
By definition, ghosting is surrounded by ambiguity, so it is not clear why contact with someone has been cut off which in turn indicates that there are no clear reasons and therefore you are not to blame for that.
It is not a bad idea to first ask if there is something we have done that could have hurt the other person, but if we do not see a clear reason why this person could have adopted an antagonistic attitude, it is best to conclude that there are no reasons why. those who feel guilty.
4. Be clear that the important thing is you
It is true that everyone has the right to end a personal relationship whenever they want, but it is also true that the person with whom contact has been broken has the right not to feel bad about it or assume that they are to blame for it. unless there are clear reasons to assume otherwise But they must be very clear, because in the face of uncertainty we are prone to pessimism.
The moment you know that a person has deliberately ghosted you, even if they have done so because they have stopped caring about what you may feel (that is, they have deliberately cut contact with you but not actively, but passively), you must be clear that regarding this issue the important thing is you, how you feel
When faced with ghosting, you can assume that that person has disappeared for you, and if the other person wants to resume contact, it is legitimate to refuse, so you should not worry about what the other person may think if you stop trying to talk to them. .
5. Don’t feed anger
Getting angry about this situation will only do that obsessive thoughts appear around this topic Do not let that happen. You simply don’t have to waste any more time worrying about it.