How To Set Limits On Toxic People? 19 Keys To Getting Them To Respect You

How can I set limits on toxic people? What to do when they are exceeded? Discover psychological tips to be able to face this situation and get them to respect you.

How to set limits on toxic people?

It’s not easy to know how to set limits on toxic people Despite this, it is something that can be done and is also necessary in many cases. In fact, setting limits is a way of taking care of ourselves since we achieve less frustration because we respect our needs. Learning to set limits is the basis of any happy and healthy relationship, be it love, family or friendship. The main secret to being able to set limits for people is to communicate them clearly. Although it may seem easy, the reality is that there are many people who will do everything they can to resist our limits. So how can we set limits on toxic people?

What does it mean to set limits?

Put limits It involves having respect for yourself and others. For this reason, it is vital to know how to put them before learning to deal with those people who surpass them. To do this, you can take into account the following:

  • Identify your limits: Be clear about what you need before you communicate it or hold other people to these boundaries.
  • Communicate them: You must let others know where your boundaries are. When you communicate your boundaries you should consider not saying them without exaggerating, blaming, or becoming defensive.

In the case that the people don’t respect your limits you must evaluate your options and act.

How to set limits on toxic people?

Put limits It requires continuity and perseverance. Therefore, there is no quick solution to dealing with those people (such as toxic people) who do not respect our boundaries. Really the only thing we can do is control how we respond when someone oversteps our boundaries. In this way, we can do the following to distance ourselves from a toxic person who does not take our opinions into consideration.

  1. Decide if limits are negotiable: Some limits are more important than others. In the event that someone does not respect you, first of all you must identify what you are willing to accept and what you consider intolerable or non-negotiable, which will allow you to decide if you really need to make a statement. emotional distance before this person. If a person does not take into account your way of being or your opinions, he does not deserve to be by your side or at least not share so much bond with you.
  2. Write down what is happening: Writing down everything that has happened and that has made you feel bad when faced with a toxic person can help you find how to react to these situations. Thanks to these notes you will be able to understand when you start to give in and what the weak points are in your limits.
  3. Accept it: Some people, no matter how much they set limits They will not deign to respect them. In these cases you should know that you cannot change another person’s behavior. Therefore, this is a very alarming sign that you should put emotional distance from these selfish people.
  4. Get out of the situation: Detachment or put emotional distance It involves trying to protect yourself from people who harm us by putting a barrier between us and them. To achieve this, one option is to physically leave a dangerous or uncomfortable situation. Although this way you will not confront the person in question, the reality is that it may be the only way to deal with them on certain occasions.
  5. Respond differently than usual: For set limits on people You should try to respond differently than you normally have. For example, instead of taking something personally or yelling, we can ignore a rude comment or make a joke about it. This changes the dynamics of our interactions. Keys to setting limits
  6. Decline your invitations: Yes one toxic person does not respect your limits, you must reject their proposals to make plans with them. In fact, putting distance is a good method for people to learn to respect you.
  7. Establish consequences: For setting limits for emotionally abusive people, you must establish consequences for their decisions. If an action of theirs exceeds your limits, they will have to deal with what it entails.
  8. Dont discuss: For set limits on toxic people You should keep in mind that it will not be useful to participate in the same discussions or take space away from an unproductive conversation or discussion.
  9. Empower yourself with your reasons: Toxic people will try to give you consequences if you don’t do what they want. The secret to set limits on these people It is precisely trying to make your decision from a position of power instead of feeling controlled by others.
  10. Understand why they see what they see in you: Toxic people will always see in others what they do not want to recognize about themselves. This is called projection. Keeping in mind why you are treated this way can help you cope and set boundaries.
  11. You don’t need to explain yourself: It is normal that if you establish a emotional distance When faced with a relationship (whether friendship, family or love), the person specifically wants explanations. If you consider that you are dealing with a toxic person, it is not necessary to explain, justify or make excuses.
  12. Own your strengths and weaknesses: If you become aware of your strengths and weaknesses, no one will be able to use them against you. It is likely that when trying set limits on toxic people, they try to manipulate you through these weak points. To avoid their blackmail, it is important to know them and know how to deal with it using your strengths.
  13. Choose when to confront them: Dealing with toxic people requires a great deal of energy. For this reason, you must understand that you do not always have to be one step ahead of all the ‘battles’. Sometimes it is better to leave this energy for the important people.
  14. Don’t be the victim: Put limits It means not being anyone’s victim. Being a victim means not having them. This security will give you strength and power to make the decisions that will help you thrive in front of these people.Set limits on toxic people
  15. Focus on the solution: To the set limits on toxic people It is normal that you feel that you will have problems. Being ‘stuck’ in this mindset will keep you stuck in thoughts that will only keep you sad, angry and powerless. It is better to focus on solutions rather than problems.
  16. Surround yourself with people who give you as much as you give: Choose wisely those people you want by your side. Surrounding yourself with positive people with whom you share your interests will make you mentally stronger, something that will help you set limits in those situations where you require it.
  17. Forgive but do not forget: Forgiveness means stopping expecting things to be different. You can never control the past, but you can control how much power it has to impact your future. Forgiveness does not mean accepting a behavior or approving it, it means that you will no longer be controlled by it. Don’t forget the way toxic people treat you and use it to have more clarity about your decisions and to set limits for these people
  18. Understand the cycle of toxic people: There is a pattern that many toxic people follow and this is when they will catch you. At first they will be attentive, loving and impressive, but as they gain your trust you will begin to see the cracks. Learn to be aware of these cycles and distance yourself when things are not to your liking.
  19. Learn not to need their approval: Never seek approval from a toxic person. Whatever you do, learn why you are doing it and make sure the reasons are good enough.
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These are some of the tips that you can take into account to learn how to set limits on toxic people In many cases, these types of relationships can have consequences for your mental health, for this reason, it may be advisable to go to a mental health professional. Don’t let anyone control you.