More Recognize And Less Criticize

More recognize and less criticize

We know that science tells us that valuing the positive in others has the consequence of improving mood and increasing motivation. However, Criticism comes more easily to us than recognition It is inherent to the human being; In fact, we can say that we are predisposed to focus our attention more on the negative than on the positive.

Our brain gives much more importance and value to the negative than to the positive. It is a good survival machine, and therefore it detects very well the bad things that may happen to me in the future, easily remembering the negative things that happened.

Studies indicate that to compensate for one negative criticism we give to a person we would have to make five acknowledgments of something positive. The negative “weighs” in importance five times more than the positive for our mind

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The propensity for negative criticism

In our vocabulary there are more words for the negative than for the positive. James R Averill, professor of psychology at the University of Massachusetts, finds 558 words that describe emotions, of which 62% are negative and 38% are positive.

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On the other hand, It takes us twenty times longer to memorize the positive than the negative We have the perception that it is smarter to point out the negative than the positive.

However, having our good recognized generates well-being, even more for the one who exercises it than for the one who receives it. Thus, in an experiment carried out by psychologists Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, they demonstrated that people who were grateful ended up happier more optimistic about the future, with better physical health and even did more sports.

For this reason, Amstel proposed that I collaborate as a psychologist in a study on Recognition in Spain. The study was carried out by the social and market research company, MyWord. 1,650 online interviews were carried out in January 2018 with the Spanish population of legal age.

The study data

Among the conclusions we reached, the following stand out.

Only half (50.3%) of Spaniards believe they deserve recognition

Our lack of recognition habit It is so significant that it is even very difficult for us to recognize our own capabilities, our effort and what we are capable of doing.

84.5% believe that envy is a very human passion but too Spanish

Surveys have shown that we do not practice the habit of recognition. However, 84.5% of those surveyed believe, as Menéndez Pidal said, that “Envy is a very human passion but too Spanish.”

40.9% think that envy is the capital sin that most characterizes us

Envy is the second most cited reason, behind lack of habit, to explain the lack of recognition: it is chosen by 67.9% of those interviewed.

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The work world is where we feel least recognized

In the workplace, the following results obtained stand out.

83.3% of the population feels that their bosses do not value a job well done

Thus, eight out of ten think that the Spanish they don’t feel recognized at work Women and people between 25 and 54 years old are the ones who most identify with this lack of recognition.

More than 80% believe that the works highlight the errors more than the successes

Among women this way of feeling is even more significant.

In meetings it is normal to “put down the boss” (61.5% do so) and criticize a colleague (52.6%)

Statistically, It is a more common habit in women

60.5% believe that it is very or very difficult for us to congratulate a boss or colleague

Men and older people adhere more to this opinion.

In the family environment…

In this sphere of our lives it is not too common to congratulate.

67.7% believe that it is difficult for us to be grateful to our mothers

It is young people who share this opinion the most

61.2% believe that couples do not recognize how important they are to each other

Men and older people think this way to a greater extent.

63.6% believe that grandparents are not recognized enough

It is not valued and recognized the time dedicated by grandparents to their grandchildren

Complaints about recognition predominate on social networks.

Other striking data extracted from the analysis carried out on more than 100,000 comments on networks are the following.

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Only in 22% of cases do we express recognition for an action well done or a deserved quality

In the remaining 78% we include totally or partially some data or word of lack of recognition

However, recognition generates well-being and motivates us to do things better. 96.9% feel encouraged to do things better when someone recognizes their effort,

91.5% feel significantly happier when receiving a WhatsApp from a loved one saying how important it is to them

This feeling of joy increases among women and young people between 18 and 24 years old

91.9% make their day when they receive a call from a friend thanking them for a favor

Women and people between 35 and 54 years old are even happier.

89.6% make their day when their boss congratulates them for a job well done

It is women and the youngest who share this feeling the most.

87.2% feel more recognized when receiving an email from a colleague saying that they appreciate them for being generous

Women are the ones who appreciate it the most

82.5% make their day when their partner highlights their virtues in front of friends or family

Women and people between 25 and 64 years old appreciate it even more.