Reasons For Lack Of Sexual Desire: How Can We Solve It?

Do you have a lack of sexual desire? Find the most common reasons why we suffer from this and how we can solve it through psychology.

How to solve the lack of sexual appetite?

In most cases, people in a relationship have different degrees of sexual appetite. So much so that the sensual desire Not only does it vary from relationship to relationship, but it also changes throughout the course of our lives.

One of the most common complaints during a relationship in a couple is lack of libido or lack of sexual desire by one of the members of the link. This situation can be preceded by both psychological and interpersonal reasons on the part of the person who suffers a loss of sexual appetite.

When do we talk about lack of sexual desire?

Say that there is a loss of sexual appetite It is very relative. On many occasions, perhaps we are perceiving that our partner simply has a faster or slower pace in intimate relationships.

Even so, people who experience a lack of sexual desire Not only do they see a decline as a rhythm in relationships of this style, but they also identify it with a problem that causes them personal discomfort and in their relationship with their partner. We talk about a problem with a lack of sexual appetite when this feeling wreaks havoc on our lives.

Even though the loss of sexual appetite or loss of libido can be a problem, what many people do not identify is that the opposite also has consequences. Both low sexual appetite and hypersexuality are two pathologies that must be treated.

What causes lack of sexual desire or sexual inappetence?

In the vast majority of cases, the lack of libido in women or men It is due to a problem with the person’s privacy. Even so, there are some common causes that cause a lack of sexual desire.

Factors in the relationship

  1. Conflict: When there is an unresolved conflict within a relationship, the relationships or the lack of sex It is the first thing that is observed in it. Therefore, solving or talking about what affects us in our relationship is a fundamental step to enjoying a happy couple.
  2. Lack of communication: One of the shortcomings in many relationships is the lack of good communication between the two members. So much so that not being able to express what we like or what we don’t enjoy during sex can be one of the causes of both male and female lack of desire.
  3. Jealousy or too much control: When we have certain personal insecurities, or lack good self-esteem, jealousy can come to us and damage our relationship. The moment we exceed the control of the other or end up with pathological jealousy, we may see that the lack of libido In the relationship it begins to show.
  4. Infidelity: One of the reasons where lack of sexual desire It is more present when infidelity arises in relationships. When this is not resolved, we must begin to rebuild our trust with each other, leaving this bad experience behind.
  5. Dependence on the couple: When one of the partners only lives for the other and does not leave room for independence, it is very common to experience a lack of sexual appetite In a situation of emotional dependence, you cannot develop a healthy relationship and enjoy love in all aspects.
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These factors in lack of sexual appetite They only indicate that there is a problem in our relationships. Therefore, it is vitally important to consult with a couples psychologist to be able to leave the loss of sexual appetite behind.

The factors of lack of sexual appetite

Medical factors

In addition to how a relationship occurs, there are also some medical causes that can lead to a relationship. lack of libido in our love life.

  1. Painful sexual relations: Feeling pain during sexual relations can imply alterations in our reproductive system. Therefore, you should consult a doctor if the sensation is so painful that it influences having a sexual inappetence
  2. Erectile dysfunction (impotence): Erectile dysfunctions can occur in both men and women. When you suffer from this condition, one of the most normal attitudes is to have a loss of sexual appetite It is vitally important in these cases to see the causes and solve the problem.
  3. Delayed ejaculation (inability to ejaculate during intercourse): Many of us know the problem of erectile dysfunction. On the other hand, few people are aware of what the opposite would be like. When there is delayed ejaculation, people cannot reach orgasm easily. So much so that it ends up affecting the mood to do it and ends up becoming a inhibited sexual desire or in a loss of sexual appetite.
  4. Pregnancy and lactation: During pregnancy, due to hormonal changes, it is completely normal to experience a lack of desire for sexuality in women

Psychological factors

In many cases, loss of libido is related to a psychological problem

  1. Depression, anxiety or low self-esteem: Experiencing anxiety, self-esteem problems or depression is a common illness in today’s society. On many occasions these psychological conditions end up affecting our sensual desire so much and it ends up leading to a lack of sex. Furthermore, stopping doing so causes people who suffer from it to end up entering a vicious circle since the lack of sexual desire It also ends up affecting their relationships.
  2. Stress: Being in a time where there is excess stress can be one of the reasons why we experience a loss of sexual appetite. So much so that many people with chronic stress have problems in their relationships not only because of the loss of sexual appetite but also because of his continuous tantrums or anger.
  3. Alcohol and other drug abuse: Addiction problems harm relationships and our mental health in many more ways than we imagine. A common event for addicts is to end up with a lack of sexual desire due to the continuous changes in our body due to the substances consumed.
  4. Menopause: Menopause is one of the stages with the most changes in women. So much so, that many experience a loss of sexual appetite during that time. Although it is a normal process, the reality is that sometimes it can be a problem for a woman’s self-esteem.
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Why is sexual desire greater at the beginning of a relationship?

“Sex is at the root of life, and we can never learn to respect life deeply until we understand sex”

Havelock Ellis, physician

When you start a new relationship and enter the falling in love phase, everything is special and wonderful. Even sex. Especially sex. He sexual desire of maintaining relationships with our partner is continuous. However, when the couple’s relationship changes from being in love to being more stable in love, the number of sexual relations decreases. Because?

First of all, it is good to explain that when we live a sexual relationship or sexual desire rewarding with a person, our body produces a series of substances such as dopamine, endorphins and serotonin that make us feel good and make us feel satisfied. For this reason, we develop a kind of “addiction” that leads us to seek this feeling again and, consequently, to continue having sexual relations with our partner.

However, with the passage of time, this feeling fades and allows us to wait longer between sexual relations, as if the body more easily forgets the pleasure experienced during the last intercourse. This decrease occurs more strongly in women. According to a study published in the journal Sexual and Relationship TherapyIn fact, the desire to have an intimate connection with a partner leads women to have a great sexual desire at the beginning of the relationship which then, with the passage of time, decreases more than that of men.

Furthermore, in women, sexual desire It is much more subject to fluctuations than that of men because it is influenced by hormonal changes caused by the menstrual cycle. The hormone called progesterone that increases in the days before and during menstruation, for example, can cause not only a not very stable mood but also decrease the desire to have sex.

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In any case, we must remember that, regardless of sex, libido or sexual desire, the changes depend on the person and the period. In fact, psychological, biological and environmental factors can affect our sexual desire. While hormones have a strong impact on libido, we must not forget that our mood also plays an important role. Stress, anxiety or sleep disorders, for example, can lead to a decreased sexual desire.

At the same time, an unhealthy lifestyle, especially in terms of nutrition, can cause a reduction in libido. Aging, certain illnesses, taking certain medications, such as anti-anxiety medications, or certain surgical procedures can also play a key role in reducing our sexual desire.

Whether we like it or not, therefore, sexual desire It may not always be constant, especially if the relationship has lasted for some time. Obviously, this does not mean that you have to do without sex. Furthermore, if we spend a long time between one relationship and another, it is possible that when we have sex with our partner again we may feel less secure and have greater anxiety about performance.

For this reason, it is always desirable that each of us not abandon sexual desire and that, as a result, we continue to explore our bodies freely. Individual sexual well-being, in fact, can have a great positive impact on our sexual relationships with our partner.

What is the treatment for lack of sexual appetite?

What are the treatments for lack of sexual appetite?

Because there are many causes for experiencing a loss of sexual appetite the reality is that there are certain treatments that are affective for most of them.

  • Treatment with psychologists: Many of the conditions that cause lack of appetite or sexual desire They come hand in hand with psychological problems. Therefore, in the vast majority of cases it is essential to go to a psychological consultation to resolve them.
  • Changes in lifestyle: Changing our lifestyle can increase our libido So much so that leaving stress behind with meditation or breathing exercises, as well as promoting a healthy lifestyle can increase our libido.
  • Improve our relationship: The bond with our partner is very important if we really want to improve our relationship as well as leave behind the little sexual appetite

Sex is vital for any relationship, although it is not the most important thing, it does play a very fundamental role in any relationship. That is why we must take care our libido not only for the rest but also for our mental health.