Sexual Sadism: Symptoms And Characteristics Of This Paraphilia
During sex, it is natural for couples to experiment with certain attitudes that are exciting. For example, playing with a certain degree of control and dominance on the part of one of the members of the couple is a circumstance that both could seek.
In this article we are going to detail what sadistic attitudes consist of during the practice of sex, we will also examine to what extent they can be considered normal and at what point they become a paraphilia (sexual disorder). We will review the characteristics of sexual sadism and what it implies from the point of view of psychology.
We can say that a person has sadistic attitudes in their intimate life when you experience some degree of pleasure by causing physical or psychological pain to your sexual partner As we have seen previously, a certain degree of agreed and choreographed sadism is quite common during the practice of sex when it does not amount to a disorder.
Taking into consideration that while we practice sexual intercourse, certain dominant behaviors motivated by our most irrational side may emerge, it is common for sex to be linked to a certain degree of role-playing. But there comes a point when we can no longer talk about role-playing, but about real violence.
Generally, the person with sadistic behaviors can carry out their particular practices of dominance and control (inflicting some type of pain) with people who are aware of them and consent to them without problem, because they enjoy them. Sexually compatible couples have no problems with this circumstance. But in other cases, this agreement does not occur, or occurs under unequal conditions.
On the other hand, sexual sadism disorder represents a significant discomfort in the life of the subject who presents it, and also intensely affects the sexual partners that he or she may have.
Typical symptoms and behaviors of sadism
Below we are going to review a list of behaviors that are common in sexual practices and that have an intrinsic component of sadism.
1. Bad language
foul language consists of verbalizing rude words towards our sexual partner, which can make them feel a degree of humiliation. Generally this type of language is accompanied by other sadistic behaviors of a physical nature.
2. Spanking
One of the most characteristic and common behaviors of sadism is spanking. These are not usually seen as abuse, but as a sign of play between the couple, despite the fact that In a strict sense, they do constitute physical aggression, no matter how minimal it may be beyond moral considerations about whether they are appropriate in a certain context.
3. Hair pulling
Another of the most common behaviors of sadism in sex is the act of pulling the partner’s hair while having sexual relations, or some type of intimate contact (it could be nothing more than kissing).
It is perhaps one of the most risky behaviors of sadism, and is on the verge of being considered risky. It involves surrounding the partner’s neck as a strangulation while engaging in some type of sexual activity, usually penetration.
When does sadism become a problem?
These are just some of the sexual practices where sadistic behaviors can be evident, apart from these There is a fairly extensive range that will depend on the particular tastes of each couple
Sexually compatible couples do not usually have any type of problem experiencing these activities, given that they are not sudden or treacherous actions, but rather respond to a prior agreement regarding the particular tastes of each of them.
Let’s now see when sadistic behavior can go from being something natural during the sexual act, to become a significant problem in people’s lives As we have seen so far, sadism understood as role-playing and prior agreement does not necessarily imply a problem for couples, unless it affects several aspects of their lives.
But if, for example, the person feels that it is difficult to control their aggressive behavior during sexual activity, or if it always involves pain with which the other person is not satisfied, sadism It may be changing from being adaptive to becoming a sexual disorder (paraphilia).
Let’s see what exactly the characteristics of a sexual sadism disorder are like. The following list contains the criteria that show whether sadism is a problem for the natural development of sexuality and life of people who suffer from this disorder.
Intensity is decisive when going from an adaptive situation to a maladaptive one; A light hair pull, a moderately forceful spanking, or some obscene words are not the same as move on to beatings or marked physical and psychological punishment
2. The frequency
Frequency refers to the subject’s ability to control sadistic behaviors, It is not always appropriate or comfortable to express sexual desire through practices of this type
At some times you can resort to other more docile methods, such as kisses, caresses, among other sexual displays that do not involve abuse. If the person is unable to put aside the abuse and only focuses on inflicting pain and humiliation, we may be in the presence of a disorder.
3. Areas affected
The degree of affectation of sexual sadism disorder goes beyond sex, and can interfere with various aspects of people’s daily lives (family, work, etc.). The level of anguish is so intense that prevents the subject from developing adequately in society
4. Comorbidity with other disorders
Comorbidity refers to symptoms of more than one disorder may be evident at the same time ; This is common in sexual behavior disorders. For example, when sadism becomes a disorder it can cause difficulty reaching orgasm, among other problems.
