Stubborn People: 5 Typical Characteristics, And How To Deal With Them
There is no single way to interpret what life is, what it implies for us. One of the consequences of this is that each person develops a more positive or negative way of seeing things, and a more flexible or more rigid mindset
And a large part of our identity is given by the way in which we learn to adapt to what is happening to us, to our environment. There are those who tend to constantly change their strategy depending on the results that their plans give when they are applied to reality, and there are those who, no matter what happens, continue to maintain the same beliefs, opinions and attitudes.
In this article we will see precisely What does it mean to be a stubborn person? and what are the characteristics of this way of being.
Stubbornness can be more or less positive depending on the context, but generally, it involves a limitation that leads us to not want to part with an idea or strategy no matter what happens Let’s see how this translates into practice.
1. They are proud
Stubborn people are not stubborn simply because they honestly believe that the right thing to do is to continue behaving as they do. They are, in part, because taking a sudden turn in their attitudes, opinions, strategies or behavioral style can erode their image, revealing that a mistake has been made or that they are simply imperfect people who do not know in advance what is going to happen.
Thus, for them, the content of what they do, think or say is not as important as the idea of being consistent in what they do.
2. Improvisation is your enemy
Just like all of us, stubborn people are forced to improvise from time to time. What happens is that in their case there is an added risk of things going wrong, because if the initial decision they make turns out to be the wrong one, it is more difficult for them to correct themselves
This is something that they themselves know, and as a consequence, based on what they learn from their experiences, they prefer to avoid exposing themselves to situations in which they have to make important decisions improvised.
3. Theory matters more to them than reality
For this type of people, on many occasions, If the theory does not correspond to reality, it is reality that is wrong This does not mean that they have a strong desire to improve the world, since to do the latter it would be necessary to make a reliable diagnosis of the problem on which they are going to intervene. It means that they prefer to hide behind that mental rigidity so as not to face that their ideas may be wrong.
4. They are interested in being seen as autonomous people
As we have seen, stubborn people want to offer an image of coherence and having very reliable criteria of their own. Therefore, although not everyone wants to lead teams, they tend to enjoy the possibility of be seen as intellectual references people with a philosophy of life to take into account.
When holding on to a belief, stubborn people need to have a justification for not taking into account all the opinions against what they do. For this reason, they often create “black lists” that lead them to dismiss the ideas of others. Everything that does not agree with them in that sense, is outside any self-critical consideration or reflection In this way doubts disappear.
What to do when dealing with them?
When dealing with stubborn people, follow these tips.
1. Don’t laugh at their mistakes
This is important, because it represents a clear confrontation. Sometimes, stubbornness can lead us to develop attitudes or behaviors that seem like a caricature, but that is no reason to laugh at those who maintain them. Doing so will only create discomfort and will not make them get out of their mistake, due to the cognitive dissonance generated: They prefer to believe that the other does not know what they are saying rather than assuming their mistakes.
2. Introduce doubt
We have also seen that stubborn people are very radical in their way of thinking, and tend to see as negative everything that goes against the belief or strategy they maintain no matter what. That means Directly attacking that belief or idea will not be effective
However, what is useful is to make the stubborn person begin to doubt them, drawing conclusions about what happens when they take those ideas to their ultimate consequences.
3. Offer a decent exit
It is not necessary to make it clear that what was stubbornly defended was absurd. Who has held on to a belief or attitude in a radical way, will hardly do that in the short term. It is enough to ignore what happened and give the other person the opportunity to stop blindly defending them without raising laughter or critical comments.
