Life is full of negative external situations that we cannot control or interfere with. However, the attitude we choose to maintain in the face of these situations and especially the image we create about ourselves makes it easier to go through those bad moments in a more enjoyable way and even opens the doors for us to come out of them stronger than ever. .
It is portrayed that The way we value ourselves says a lot about what happens to us on a daily basis and even about what we allow to happen to us. In short, if we really believe that we deserve good things, we attract them and vice versa. Therefore, it is known that valuing oneself and self-esteem go hand in hand, to such an extent that those individuals with low self-esteem and, consequently, little self-worth, show a clear decline in their interpersonal relationships, personal well-being and, generally, a drop in their quality of life.
Psychological experts say that self-worth causes us to behave in accordance with our thoughts, values and ideals. Therefore, knowing how to value yourself influences all facets of life since those who lack it usually find it difficult to relate to others or complete the actions of daily life. How do I know if I value myself enough?
Signs that show you are not valuing yourself enough
Many times we are not aware of how little we value ourselves ; Therefore, in today’s article, we will analyze in depth some signs that reveal this harmful attitude with which we face the vast majority of situations in life. Our intention is not to alarm anyone, since we have the great advantage that self-worth can be learned and improved day after day. Below, we list 8 of these signs:
1. You repress your ideas and thoughts
Has it ever happened to you to be surrounded by people and think that it is not worth expressing your ideas because they are not as good as that of others? This is a clear sign that your self-esteem is low and you do not value yourself enough. Have confidence in yourself, get it into your head that your opinion counts.
What you have to say is just as important as what everyone else says Stop comparing yourself to others since you will only think that you lack something that they do have. To replace this feeling, we recommend shifting your focus of attention onto yourself. Think about how you have improved over time and if you want to compare yourself, compare yourself with your past self.
2. You justify the bad behavior of others towards you
You have to be clear that it is not okay for someone to treat you badly under any circumstances. It is true that each person has a different personality and therefore, some react more peacefully in discussions and others are more likely to react quickly. However, this is not your problem. It doesn’t matter if the person has a calmer trait or, on the contrary, more upset, you have to know that absolutely no one can speak badly to you or have the right to give you a bad time.
3. You don’t see the positive things that others see in you
This is another of the main signs that we do not value ourselves enough. If your family, friends, or partner see beautiful things in you and you are not able to see them, it may be that you value yourself little. The people around you tell you how handsome, intelligent, studious, etc. What you are and you can’t accept it and see it. Thinking that they say it out of commitment or to look good It is a clear example of low self-esteem and little self-love. This doesn’t stop here. Going one step further, if your surroundings warn you that your partner does not have good attitudes towards you and instead of listening to them you think that they are exaggerating and you walk away, it is one more warning that indicates that you do not value yourself enough.
Many people have great difficulty saying no. It is difficult for us to refuse even if it goes against our values and ideals for fear of the consequences it may have or even because we have been educated to be cordial and kind in any situation. Now, knowing how to say no without guilt or shame is vital to not get burned in the long run by allowing others to make decisions for us. In this regard, experts affirm that assertiveness is a basic pillar for our self-esteem because it allows us to communicate effectively, valuing our rights and opinions. Once again, assertiveness is something that can be improved and learned.
5. “Shopping” being with people
Individuals with low self-worth think that no one really wants to be with them, so they “buy” time with others. That is, they constantly invite their friends to the movies, always pay for dinners with their partner, give expensive gifts and ultimately spend a large amount of money on plans to satisfy others. At the end of the day, It is a way of making sure and at the same time reassuring yourself by feeling that others are with you because they “want to” and not because of commitment or out of pity (although in reality they are there because you pay for everything).
6. You give more than you receive
You are always willing to give your house, your money, your time to others without expecting anything in return. You feel indebted to others and that’s why you don’t stop giving and giving. Being empathetic, generous and kind are exceptional qualities that you should not exclude from your life, however, you have to find balance. People who do not value themselves enough do not carry out their actions to be generous, but to make sure that someone loves them. In case it is not obvious, this is not a good way to start any type of relationship since the probability of generating toxic ties, where others approach you out of convenience, skyrockets.
7. You don’t forgive yourself
If the thought of “I don’t value myself enough” has crossed your mind, you should practice forgiveness with yourself. Many times things do not go as we had planned, but Holding on to a mistake, whether towards others or towards yourself, ends up making the ball bigger and does more damage People who value themselves little do not allow themselves to go through the healing process of forgiveness. Therefore, love yourself and understand that you are not a fortune teller and there is no way to know for sure if what you do is constantly correct. We all make mistakes, it’s part of life. The important thing is to learn from mistakes to grow on a personal level. The key to valuing yourself is precisely to focus on the present, that is, on what you are now and how you can improve it.
How we talk to ourselves says a lot about our self-worth. The words we use to each other have a great influence on our thoughts, actions and emotions. Therefore, practice positive or motivating affirmations and you will see how it helps you value yourself and face the various situations in life in a more effective way.
In fact, many times we do not realize all the effort we have made to face certain moments To learn to value yourself, you must be more grateful for everything you have managed to do. In short, the easy way is to look back critically and wish we had done better. However, it is better to focus on the progress that you have made little by little throughout your life.
In conclusion, these are some of the key signs that can reveal low self-esteem and therefore, low self-worth. When faced with a problem, valuing yourself involves focusing on your strengths and trying to confront it with the appropriate tools and skills instead of focusing on the negative aspects of the situation. Valuing yourself also means accepting yourself and putting yourself as an absolute priority. Therefore, if you have identified with the signs described above, we recommend that you go to a mental health professional so that he can help you and accompany you on the long but precious path of self-worth.
