At VillaRamadas we consider that we must face several principles in order to have a full life. Here we will talk about the first; the truth.
The search for truth as a vital principle
The search for truth is one of the great demands of human beings. He who lives in the truth is well with himself and has freedom as a guide for action He who lives in the truth, fears nothing, increases his self-confidence, credibility and integrity, elevating the authenticity of the being.
We have the natural ability to change and grow. We are afraid of punishments and repressions, we tell little lies, here and there. We judge that, only in this way, can we be free to explore the world through our eyes and with behaviors that allow us to learn, do and be.
These little “non-truths”, created out of fear of some consequence, create a habit , that of doing and not saying. The big question is that there are no small or big lies, but simply lies.
Living a lie is living dead
The lie corrodes, uses and kills inside. It is the desperation of maintaining a facade for others and using masks to cover up what we think, feel or how we behave.
It is the fatigue of always remembering what has been said and to whom, so as not to be caught. Lying requires greater use of memory and more attention to words It forces constant vigil and a permanent state of alert. It tires, destroys, ruins intimacy, values ​​and principles, leading to mental madness.
Individuals remain trapped, worn out, chained, sad and incomplete, whenever they feed on lies.
To live in the truth is to live in all its fullness
To truly live is to be complete, joyful, free, without worrying about remembering what you have said and to whom. It is not possible to live on both sides, as so many people have tried for years. It’s like being abstinent from alcohol and drugs, but engaging in self-destructive behaviors; or assert themselves as independent and financially dependent on their parents.
The truth guides us towards healthy emotional growth that generates success : “Try to be a person of value, instead of being a person of success,” said Albert Einstein.
Before obtaining something, be it financial success, professional success or anything else, the person needs to Be. Before Having, we have to Be. It is necessary to have very clear truths within yourself, so that the development of emotional balance is constant, evolutionary.
Emotional management should be done regularly , since every day there are external triggers that trigger our emotions to levels that can be suffocating. For example, if you arrive at work and we say goodbye, that causes anger, fear and insecurity. If on the same day, you argued with your boyfriend or girlfriend, you feel even worse, perhaps close to the limit. These feelings have to be processed so as not to lead to despair, depression, madness or death.
The importance of emotional balance
The mind is mysterious and complex. Being so, needs care and a good dose of balance, otherwise serious psychological problems may arise It is very important to develop cognitive balance by the parameters of truth, because many psychological problems come from traumas, past frustrations, negative beliefs. An example of this is the case of depressive pathology, which has reached millions of people in the four corners of the world.
A life focused on the past, temporarily blocked, triggers mental loss of control. It is necessary to think correctly about the truths that surround us evaluate whether or not they are our own truths and define objectives for the future.
It is necessary learn to anticipate all the attitudes or behaviors that make you feel guilty , such as lying. You must live the truth, to avoid uncomfortable situations. And you should avoid behaviors that will never receive support from anyone. Behavior is something that expresses everything you have inside you. If you squeeze a tomato, no orange juice comes out.
In the same way, what is inside you will always come out within you. As such, your behavior is the mirror of your interior. If you feel anger, guilt or frustration and if you have not learned to process those feelings, those moods will affect your behavior.
The truth is externally important in the development of balance of feelings , thoughts, behaviors and spirituality, because it is only possible to overcome a problem, illness or crisis if we do not live in denial. Denying our current reality, what we have, what we are, what we feel, what we live, will totally block our change and growth.
An example
The decision to opt for the truth and, consequently, recover freedom of choice, reminds me of a Spanish patient; He was a man whom I really liked to advise in my first years as a therapist, in England.
I still remember the concerns he showed. One day, he questioned me more or less in these terms:
He He lied as easily as he told the truth She did it on “autopilot.” He, like most of the addicts he worked with, breathed lies. Most of the time he wasn’t even aware of it. It was simply his way of feeding his illness.
Pretending, dissimulating, deceiving others was the way to hide his true Being. He lived a double life, oriented towards appearances and illusion
Helping this patient recognize, identify and change mental processing was challenging and very stimulating. It is a huge satisfaction to have helped regain the mother’s trust in five months. He chose the truth and was rewarded.
Years after having advised this man, I received a letter with a Marbella postmark, with a photograph inside and a small letter of a few paragraphs. And it said like this:
Since we were together, more than 7 years ago, a lot has changed in my life, partly with your help. I conquered self-love, self-esteem, integrity and dignity. Married. I regained the trust of my parents, wife and my sisters. I have just finished the electrician course, I set up a small electrical assembly company, which is very successful thanks to our effort, dedication, sincerity, responsibility and mainly authenticity. But a miracle also happened during these seven years: I am a father. She was born, filling our hearts with love, joy and happiness.
It’s true, I’m a father! And I am loving every second of my real life in the company of my wife and daughter. Her smile, her light, pure blue eyes, the soft and fine texture of her skin, her smell… My heart dances with so much emotion in every moment that I live with her and for her.
Thank you for believing in me, when I no longer believed. Today I live in the truth and feel love. True love.