What Does it Mean to Live in the Present?

It is inevitable to resort, on more than one occasion, to our past. It is the entire path that has gotten us to where we are, for better or worse. It is also normal that, in a more or less adaptive way, we think about the future, thinking about how to evolve a situation over which we have no control.

The problem arises when we focus too much on moments that don’t really exist. The past is past, and the future has not yet come. We cannot allow them to take control of our lives, which is happening now.

Many people wonder what it means to live in the present, a question with a complex answer. Below we will try to give one, as well as talk about how to do it.

What does it mean to live in the present? A summary

The past gives us identity and experiences, which mark our personality and knowledge. However, that past is not a burden that we should carry around all day. We are what we are doing now to improve what we were

This is the healthy attitude that we should take in relation to our present, which is the only real moment we are living. The past is just memories, and the future is just hypothetical scenarios they will come, if they have to come.

Our actions, our thoughts, our present is what makes us who we are. Let’s do more and worry less! Living in the present becomes an imperative in a society in which we constantly eat our heads with things that, really, are not that big of a deal.

Maybe they are important, but we can’t do anything if we don’t try to take the bull by the horns and put in the necessary means and willingness to focus on being more adaptive, fulfilled and happy

That is why living in the present involves addressing those aspects of reality that are uncomfortable and we integrate them into our experience as part of a set of changing situations: neither as elements of the past that we are condemned to drag along, nor as obstacles that we will have to deal with. to deal with only in the future, and of which we cannot have clues in the here and now. Precisely, accepting the present moment implies being able to face reality from a constructive mentality.

The past is past

The past acts by archiving all our experiences perceived as important. These experiences can be good, beneficial for learning, but they can also be fuel for worries and regrets.

It is said that human beings spend 70% of their thinking thinking about past things, especially bad ones: the breakup with our partner, we didn’t study enough for an exam, we forgot to call our brother to congratulate him on his birthday… The past, poorly managed, is what prevents us from living in the present What can be done is not to change the past, but to modify the present to redefine our memories and our material reality inherited from those events that have already happened.

It has happened to all of us on more than one occasion that, while we are working, studying, doing a sport or whatever, suddenly, recurring thoughts, flashbacks of really unpleasant situations come to our mind, like unwanted guests.

We stop focusing on what we are doing and focus, over and over again, on remembering those bad experiences. What’s the point of all this? Why live that again, even in an imagined way? Are we going to magically change it by thinking about it a lot?

We may regret bad things we did, or the simple fact of not pursuing our dreams. We wanted to study English, but we dropped out of the course, we wanted to get in shape, but the sports clothes were left in the closet, we wanted to tell a girl or a boy about going out, but we kept quiet… we wanted many things, but we did none of them. AND we martyr ourselves again for what we did not do, unconsciously believing that if we thought about it in the past but didn’t do it, we will never do it. Lie. Never say Never.

It’s time to live here and now

Only those who don’t try fail. Trying to live in the present, do it with new experiences, change the way of thinking and, ultimately, putting the focus on what we see, hear, feel and do, is the key to happiness.

Now is the time when we can make changes in our lives, not the past It is now that we can choose how to feel, how to think, and how to act. The present is what exists and, as an existing entity, we can control it. The past and the future are things that are not there, that do not already/yet exist.

When we are able to focus our attention on the present, our mind is freed from past or future negative thoughts. When the conception of who we are is based on bad memories, things that we wish we had not experienced, we live in continuous suffering. For that reason We must accept our past as a learning experience, not as a determinant of our present

Learn to enjoy the moment

Happiness is lived in the moment, not in the past, nor in the future. We may have been happy in the past, and we may also be happy in the future, but the past has already been, and the future has not yet arrived. Let’s focus on the present, because happiness occurs in that moment.

One of the factors that contributes to manifesting psychopathology, especially of the depressive and anxiety type, is not being able to stop paying attention to things that there is no way that can be changed, basically the past and the future. What we can change, what can bring us benefit and pleasure, is the present if we have time and the occasion allows it.

Living in the now is not a simple thing. It requires progressive learning, generating the habit of focusing on the now, focusing on what we are experiencing, preventing our mind from being scattered and having too many temptations thinking about all kinds of thoughts that lead to bad past experiences and worries about the future. future.

It’s not that we should stop worrying, excuse the redundancy, whether we worry about the past or the future. The human being is an intelligent animal, with the ability to foresee what he has to do and consider what options are available to him. It is our nature, as beings with developed thinking, to think about what is going to happen to us and focus our cognitive resources and skills on the search for the hypothetical situation.

The past, made up of the experiences lived and the lessons learned from them, is the guide that helps us consider how to proceed. The problem is that, the way our minds are made, if we are too neurotic or obsessive, This is what generates many emotional imbalances in us

Both the past and the future are two things that we do not control, which is why it causes us so much anxiety, even though we rationally know that we cannot change the past and the future is something that will come, regardless of our concern.

The importance of Mindfulness

Living in the present does not only mean stopping thinking about the past or the future. It is also learning to make the most of the here and now, enjoy it, be fully aware of it. Concentrating on every detail, be it the music we are listening to, the taste of the tea we are drinking, its temperature, the aroma of the room… In short, learning to enjoy present situations, involving our body and our ability to perceive, trying to see the good things around us

Mindfulness is one of the techniques that has been gaining the most popularity in the field of psychology, something that is not surprising, given that it allows us to achieve a state of full awareness of the current moment, which is, basically, learning to live in the present. We engage our minds in the here and now, regardless of anything else.

Although the name of the technique is modern, its roots are quite deep, based on Buddhist philosophical doctrines, seeing the experience of the current moment as an inexhaustible source of knowledge.

When thinking about the present, as long as it is pleasant, the person can significantly reduce their stress levels In relation to what we have already discussed previously, what is the point of remembering an unpleasant event in the past? What’s the point of worrying about something that hasn’t happened yet? Through Mindfulness a state of relaxation is achieved, a state in which the only thing that matters is what we are experiencing now, in the place where we are.

How to learn to live in the present?

One of the basic principles of Mindfulness is to accept everything we have now, without making evaluations or judging how good or how bad it is. Present experiences are accepted, as they are, as they come without saying that this thing is positive or that other is negative.

This is especially useful for negative emotions, such as sadness, pain, or impulsivity. By accepting these negative emotions, without obsessing over the fact that they are negative, they lose their power. They are there, like the flame of the fireplace on a winter afternoon. We can either try to pour water on the flame, which, although it may be surprising, will fan it, or we can take a chair, sit near the heat, look at the flame and accept that it is there, allowing time to extinguish it.

After having lived the emotional part of the experience, it is time to interpret it. Let’s stop for a moment thinking about what we have felt, and why we have felt it. Was it worth feeling this way? Was it that serious? How is the unpleasantness gone? How are we going to act? Before deciding to take the next step, it is worth reflecting since impulsivity is never a good advisor.

To live in the present it is necessary to accept that there are things that we will not be able to control. It is true that, through a change in thinking and taking actions, we are building our present. If we want to do something, like get in shape, learn a language or regain a friendship, There is no better way than to get to work

However, there are things that we can never control, and that is not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, wanting to control absolutely everything, as if our reality were a mechanical device in which you can control the movement of all the gears, levers and parts, is a big mistake. It is the worst way to try to live in the present, generating tension and stress. You have to stop the circumstances from flowing, like the waters of a river.