What Is Self-hatred, Causes And How To Overcome It
Self-hatred is a rejection of oneself that usually originates from experiences of criticism, rejection, or intense social pressure. To overcome it, it is essential to work on personal acceptance. Negative thoughts about ourselves can cause us more than one headache.
In this sense, many people have high levels of self-demand and do not allow themselves to make mistakes or regret. When faced with any discomfort, they have an internal voice that tortures them to the point of exhaustion. In this PsychologyFor article, we will provide you with information about What is self-hatred, causes and how to overcome it.
Self-hatred is a psychological phenomenon in which a person experiences a deep rejection or aversion to aspects of oneself. This feeling goes beyond simple low self-esteem or dissatisfaction with certain personal characteristics.
In self-hatred, the person may develop a intense and generalized negative self-perceptioncoming to feel worthless, inadequate or even “despicable.” This type of feeling can range from hatred towards physical characteristics, personality traits, to certain behaviors or situations in which the person feels that they have “failed.”
Why self-hatred arise
Self-hatred arises from a combination of personal, social and psychological factors that lead a person to develop a negative or contemptuous view of themselves. We show them to you below:
Environmental factors: unpleasant experiences experienced in childhood leave a mark that lasts over time. In this sense, situations such as sexual abuse, physical and/or verbal abuse, reproaches from family members, bullying and the death of loved ones can be conditions for self-hatred.
Biological factors: Genetic background can influence one’s emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. In the case of people who possess self-hatred, there are chances that cortisol levels will rise during those moments of self-criticism. Likewise, serotonin and dopamine decrease in the face of personal achievements.
Social factors: Ideals of success, social mandates, and societal norms can be triggers for self-hatred. This is due to the predominance that certain social groups may have that are linked to happiness and joy.
How self-hatred affects mental health
Self-hatred has negative consequences that we can observe in the personality of those who suffer from it. In this section, we will explain the effects it has on mental health:
Causes emotional problems: Feelings of self-rejection can lead to depression and anxiety. This occurs because internal hatred diminishes the desire to project a good life in the long term. On the other hand, self-hatred causes helplessness in the face of the lack of solutions to daily life problems.
drug use: Addiction to toxic substances is another consequence of self-hatred. In this sense, alcohol and drug abuse can be an attempt to silence the self-reproaches characteristic of this problem. In these cases, we recommend reading this article on How to stop the urge to use drugs.
Risky behaviors: Personal abuse can lead to bodily self-harm, inappropriate sexual behavior and other situations that can be life-threatening.
Loss of creativity: The lack of personal initiative in the face of the challenges of everyday life is one of the consequences of self-hatred. In this sense, the person may feel incapable of carrying out any creative action.
How to overcome self-hatred
Although it is not a simple process, there are ways to deal with self-hatred. Discover the best tips to overcome it below:
Recognize and challenge your negative thoughts: Harsh self-criticism is one of the main causes of self-hatred. Try writing down your self-critical thoughts and then challenge them one by one. Ask yourself if they are really true or if you are being unfair to yourself.
Practice self-compassion: involves treating yourself with the same kindness and empathy that you would show toward a friend who is going through a difficult time. When self-critical thoughts arise, try telling yourself phrases like: “I’m doing the best I can right now.”
Change your internal dialogue: Negative self-talk perpetuates self-hatred. You can begin to identify phrases that tend to be derogatory towards yourself and transform them into more constructive statements. For example, change “I am a failure” to “I am learning and growing from my mistakes.”
Surround yourself with people who support you: Surround yourself with people who value and respect you just as you are. Sometimes self-hatred is aggravated because we are around people who constantly criticize or judge. In these cases, it is important to set limits or reduce contact, if possible.
Take care of your body and mind: Eating well, exercising, getting enough sleep, and doing activities you enjoy can help you feel better. Although they don’t solve the entire problem, taking basic care can improve your mood and give you a more solid foundation to face your emotions.
Practice gratitude: It is a powerful tool to counteract self-hatred, because it helps you focus on what you have and the positive aspects of your life. Try writing down three things you’re grateful for every day, even if they’re small, like a nice moment, something you accomplished, or a quality you like about yourself.
Forgive yourself and accept your mistakes: Self-hatred often arises from the inability to forgive ourselves. We all make mistakes, and they do not define our value. Practicing self-forgiveness is a liberating and necessary act. Remember that no one is perfect and that mistakes are part of the learning process. In this article we explain how to make peace with yourself.
Seek professional help if necessary: Talking to a therapist can help you tremendously. Sometimes professional support is necessary to deepen feelings of self-hatred, especially if they are persistent or associated with more serious problems such as depression or anxiety. A professional can help you develop tools and strategies customized for your situation.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to What is self-hatred, causes and how to overcome it we recommend that you enter our Clinical Psychology category.
References:
Mozzi, V. A. (2012). Hate and segregation. IV International Congress of Research and Professional Practice in Psychology. XIX Research Conference, VIII Meeting of Mercosur Psychology Researchers. Faculty of Psychology, University of Buenos Aires.
