What Is Transsexuality And How To Help Children Identified With It?
Does your son or daughter not feel comfortable in their body? Do you think you may be facing a case of transsexuality? Find out what it is and how you can help your children in this situation.
It is true that in this society from the moment we are born we are exposed to a series of prejudices : baby clothes classified by color, boys playing with dolls that exalt strength and girls playing with dolls that establish a prototype of unreal beauty or promoting their role as caregivers. How many times have we heard that phrase: big children don’t cry? We establish all these types of behaviors from a very young age and they inevitably pigeonhole us. We are sentenced with statements like: boys should not wear makeup, they cannot wear skirts, they cannot carry a purse, they cannot wear heels and they cannot show their emotions. If they do, it is because they must be unbalanced or homosexual.
That a person is gay or transgender or transsexual Absolutely nothing depends on the sexist education given to the minor. There are many boys who are educated as “machotes”, they sign up for soccer or karate classes, they are masculinized as much as they can and even so, some of them, if they are homosexuals, will show it at some point, although when they do, They will come into conflict with themselves because they will feel different and that they are doing something wrong. Do you really want that for your child? Isn’t it healthier to let him decide what he wants to dress up as, what he wants to play or what colors he likes best?
This type of behavior in transgender or transsexual children , supposedly inappropriate, provoke rejection both by adults and by peers who see their partner as a “freak.” Perhaps it is a stage, but at the end of the day, experimentation is what makes it easier to choose. If there were not so many prejudices on the part of adults, the media and toys, there would probably be more diversity and with that we are not promoting homosexuality or sexual identity disorders. The number of people who are transgender may increase, but that would not be because we are promoting it, but simply because transsexuality would stop being hidden.
From the age of two or three, awareness of gender identity begins to progressively develop, at the same time that children begin to understand and name the world around them. That is why at that age some children already begin to show signs of nonconformity with their gender. When we talk about gender identity We refer to the degree of identification with the sex that we have been assigned at birth. It must be clarified that gender is nothing more than a social and cultural construction and that certain roles framed as “masculine” or “feminine” have traditionally been assigned depending on the sex acquired at birth.
In the first two years of life, most children differentiate between two types of people: men and women. Likewise, the environment and society reinforce the conventional signs of the “corresponding” role and punish those that do not “correspond” with multiple signals towards activities, games, ways of dressing and attitudes traditionally classified as “masculine” or “feminine.” That is why at those times there are already children who persistently begin to deny their genital organs, not wanting to dress in the assigned way and who opt for activities carried out by people of the opposite sex. In the following years and towards the age of seven, some feel that they do not fit into those roles and typifications that are assigned to their gender and that they “go outside the norm.”
But who decides what the norm is? Who defines the identity of each person, the law, the family, their genitals? There are many questions that we can ask ourselves about gender identity and that of transgender people , but the reality is that it is a great social taboo that is not talked about. This invisibility is done under the pretext of protecting the minor, but far from helping, it contributes to survival in an environment that discriminates.
The fight against all types of discrimination identity reasons , sexual orientation and respect for human sexual diversity should be an objective for health and education professionals. Education in diversity is the basis for a tolerant and inclusive society. In this sense, home and school are the most important tools when it comes to destroying social constructions of gender and teaching how to be whoever you want to be, free of impositions.
How to act if my child is transgender?
The majority of children express gender nonconformity at a very early age and arouse suspicion in parents. However, many parents have a hard time accepting this reality and try to avoid having a direct conversation about the issue. It is sometimes thought that over time these tendencies towards identification with transgender or transsexuality can change, although this very rarely happens.
All children need unconditional support from parents for their self-esteem and a positive self-concept, even more so in transgender cases since they face a society where obstacles and situations of discrimination still exist. It is advisable to seek support and guidance to be able to offer our child a safe environment in which she can express herself freely and develop her own personality. The goal is to allow yourself to be who you want to be for her well-being and happiness.
We must all do personal work on our own beliefs, prejudices, learned biases and constructions regarding gender identity to contribute to the tolerance of diversity and the evolution of society. Possibly some of the people who read this headline, the first thing they ask themselves is What does it mean to be transgender? well it is easy to explain, it refers to the fact that the person identifies with a different sex than the one they genetically and physically have.
The role of the family and the environment is important in these cases. It is not about convincing the person, usually minors between 10 and 20 years old, that they are wrong and that it is just their quirks or their ways of seeing the world that are a little strange compared to the average. These people know and feel that it is what they want, and we cannot tell them that they are “weird” or “special” because that is not the case. We must respect that there is a genetic reality that he made a mistake when crossing his genital apparatus with his mind, making a mistake, and placing the person in a body that now seems strange to him.
Differences between transsexual and transgender
If my son tells me this, it does not mean that he is gay, or lesbian if he feels like a woman, or heterosexual, that’s not it, but it means that he feels like a woman despite being born as a man and vice versa. Nor is it the same as a man or woman who practices transvestism , that is to say, enjoying being, at specific moments, the opposite sex to the one to which one was born. Here we have a boy or girl who fully feels like a woman or man, and identifies as such always and in every way. We can also have a girl who is not only masculine, but who feels completely and completely a man, despite not having the corresponding genitals and having bulging breasts, which will be uncomfortable for a man.
This, which we could call in some way dysformia, is not a pathology, but a reality. The person who is going through it requires changes in their body that are in accordance with how they feel. To understand the emotional and psychological pressure What this means, we just have to imagine each of us what it would be like if one day we woke up with the opposite sex to the one we have, with which we feel comfortable.
The importance of the environment in transgender or transsexual people
The greatest source of problems for these people will be the social environment, the pressure of those who do not accept that one can live as one wants, and who insist on deciding what your life should be. orientation or even how you should feel.
We all have the typical grandmother or mother who told you that “I don’t know why you don’t like this dish of food if it is delicious.” This bothered us, but it was still an attempt to impose something “innocuous” that affects us. minimally emotionally or psychologically, no matter how much it was repeated every time he repeated the same dish. But if this is referring to your own being, to how you feel, this is terrible.
Let us keep in mind that we must respect others as much as possible, be it as the being wants and not as we believe it should be. Therefore, as a reflection, I would like to finish by commenting that it is important to allow children to develop their full potential, and if that means allowing them to dress up in things that you don’t like, you don’t like, but your child doesn’t have why adopt your tastes and preferences. Allowing freedom is what will make your child choose and be happy, isn’t that what all parents want?
