What Not To Say To Someone With Depression? 5 Phrases You Should Avoid

Do you want to help someone with depression and don’t know how? The first step is not to do the wrong behaviors that many of us can commit. Discover the depression phrases that you should avoid.

What should we not say to someone with depression?

It is very likely that you do not know how to help a depressed person In many cases family and friends don’t even know what not to say to someone with depression. For this reason, it is essential to understand what depression is and what words or actions we should not do to people who suffer from it. To try to understand what attitudes we must put aside to help someone with depression, it is vital that we understand why each of these acts affects a depressed person so much.

Phrases about depression How to understand this disease?

There are some depression phrases that can help us clarify why we do not understand the reasons why someone suffers from a depressive disorder. In many cases, the key to knowing how to cheer up someone who is depressed is to understand why they feel that way.

  1. They don’t understand why they are sad: This is one of the depression phrases that can shed more light on this disease. People who suffer from depression as a psychological disorder live without understanding why they are sad. They experience these negative emotions and thoughts without anything having happened to them. Therefore we should not say to the depressed: “But why are you getting like this?”because he doesn’t know.
  2. It is not the “reason” for depression: In cases where depression arises after the loss of a loved one, upset can act as a trigger for a latent depression Therefore, something not to tell someone with depression is precisely to leave aside what causes it since it is not as simple as it may seem at first glance.
  3. Do not repeat the arguments: Do not repeat the arguments with the vain intention of convincing the depressed person the disproportion of his sadness. For example, you should avoid these types of expressions: “If you have a good job, a good family” “I don’t understand why you are like this, if you don’t lack anything!” In this way, these expressions, instead of helping them, become phrases of discouragement for those affected.
  4. Don’t get angry with the depressed: Sometimes the family and friends of the depressed forget that they don’t feel this way for pleasure. That is why it is common to say: “Cheer up!” . Even on certain occasions some family members or friends can become angry with the depressed person, leaving behind everything that they do against depression
  5. Do not propose excessive tasks to complete: The depressed person feels with very little energy, so it would be antitherapeutic to suggest that they do more activities. This will cause a blockage of activity, since any routine and insignificant task seems like an overwhelming burden. It is best to leave him alone but encourage him to do pleasant activities that require little effort.
  6. Attend work?: There are people who think that “work is the best medicine”. This may be true if the symptoms of depression are not very severe. On the other hand, if they are intense, the depressed person will have poor work performance. Therefore, this may be one of the burnout phrases that affected people may receive the most.
  7. You could use a trip: Another mistake would be to tell the depressed person to change their scene. Again, if the symptoms are very intense, it will not help, because they present anhedonia (inability to enjoy things). It will only be useful in cases with mild depression and little clinical course.
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Are depression phrases They can help us understand why we make mistakes when treating a depressed person.

Depression phrases to understand it

Phrases you should not say if you want to help someone with depression

There are different ways to help someone with depression, but one of the first actions we must do before starting to do so is to avoid certain attitudes that can be harmful to the person affected. To do this, it is crucial to leave some of these discouragement phrases or phrases about depression that are very common to hear from most people who have someone next to them with this condition.

  1. I understand what’s happening to you, worse things have happened to me “: This is one of the most used phrases to encourage a depressed person. when you want help someone depressed Your first goal should be to give them a space to vent. When someone feels bad, whether because something has happened to them or because it is their nature, knowing that others have been through something worse does not make them feel good or lessen their pain. By explaining how much worse our story is, we don’t allow the person to talk about their own pain because we focus the story on ourselves and not the other. Additionally, it can make the person feel guilty and think that their pain is not legitimate. We have all suffered in our lives, but we must know that the reasons for suffering, the way we feel it, and the resources we have to deal with it are different for each one of us. That is why it is better to tell the depressed person that we are there to listen to them and help them find a way to solve what is making them suffer, understanding the problem and analyzing possible solutions.
  2. I don’t understand why you are depressed, we all have problems, why don’t you fight? “: Depression is not something you choose to have. Depression is a real illness, a psychological disorder that has a great impact on the life of the person who suffers from it. The way a disorder is learned and how it affects everyone differs for each individual. say this type of phrases about depression It only generates pressure and frustration in the person to whom it is addressed because, think, if it were only a matter of attitude, who would choose to be depressed? On the contrary, engaging with the person seeking help by making them aware of their problem and reminding them that, if they do not have the personal resources to overcome it, the help of a professional can be useful and will allow them not to feel judged, it will offer them a ray of hope to get out of your current state. What should you not say to someone with depression?
  3. “Tomorrow you will see things differently and it will be better”: What if that doesn’t happen tomorrow? No one can be sure that tomorrow the day will be better and, of course, if the situation or the person’s behavior remains the same, it is practically impossible for things to change. That is why it is important not to make false promises. Furthermore, this can only lead to frustration and guilt in the person. It is better to be there for her and help her make small plans to help her find some joy or provide alternative, more positive forms of support to deal with the situation from a different perspective.
  4. “I think you’re exaggerating, it’s not that big of a deal”: Being depressed is conceiving the world, the past, the present and especially the future, with a pessimistic and discouraging view. This way of interpreting experiences or circumstances is not chosen. It is important to insist on this: the depression It is a real disease, one does not choose to have it and no one takes pleasure in this state. The fact of not being able to deal with this disease does not imply that there is a lack of will to do so. It is important to empathize with the other person, making them understand that you are there for whatever they need, even if they do not fully understand what they are experiencing. By making him understand that what he is experiencing is negative but that you are there to help him through it as much as possible, you will give him hope.
  5. You have to do your part to improve “: If it were that easy, I would have done it a long time ago, don’t you think? The feeling of helplessness that this phrase generates in the person who suffers is immense and, obviously, denotes a great lack of understanding. The person simply can’t do it, and even if he could, he wouldn’t know where to start.
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So remember, let that person know that you are there for whatever they need and offer them the possibility of having a professional help them have tools to deal with depression.

The causes of depression They depend on each person: we know that it has biological origins (genetic, neurochemical, physical health), psychological (cognitive style, behavior, confrontation with reality) and social origins (discomfort with the environment), stress, cultural influences. It is obvious that although antidepressant medications are useful, they must be accompanied by good psychological counseling that will help the person defend themselves, solve their problems, think clearly, establish positive relationships and overcome complicated situations. When dealing with a person who is depressed, one may often want to give them advice. However, some phrases are inappropriate and will only make the other person feel guilty.