It is more common than we think to find people who say “they have it all” and yet do not feel happy This in turn causes greater discomfort in the person since he may feel guilty and ends up thinking that there is something wrong with him that he cannot be happy. It also happens that, sometimes, the environment increases that feeling of guilt when they make comments like “I don’t know what you are complaining about”, “but everything is going well for you”, “you have everything”, etc…
But what does it mean to be happy? Throughout time, happiness has been understood as achieving self-realization and achieving our goals Also how to take care of oneself and be self-sufficient or how to experience pleasure while fleeing from suffering. Nowadays, practically everything we are made to see that has to do with happiness refers to things external to us and mainly material things. And perhaps here is the error. We hope that by achieving all these things happiness will come automatically and when it doesn’t arrive we feel that something is wrong and that we are not happy. It’s a matter of expectations.
That is why it is important to look within, self-esteem, self-knowledge, really see who we are and what we want. That’s where true happiness is. Erich Fromm said that “if you are not happy with everything you have, you will not be happy with everything you lack.” Researcher Emily Esfahani states that “a meaningful life provides, in the long run, a deeper and more lasting feeling of satisfaction.”
And it insists on four elements: belonging and relationships with others, a purpose in life, a coherent story about ourselves and a space for transcendence. Happiness is something dynamic, it comes and goes, so it is important to have a meaning to hold on to when things go wrong
So why am I not happy if I have everything?
The main thing is that everything you have does not guarantee your satisfaction. And all material things are very good, but if we do not have good mental health it will be impossible to be happy. So, if you have everything and you are not happy, you have to do an act of deep reflection on yourself and your mental health.
1. Your life does not fit your authentic values or needs
You can have a satisfactory lifestyle, have a job but not the one of your dreams, you can have a partner but have gaps in the relationship or a lack of enthusiasm, that is, you can have many things but they are not adjusting well to your true needs. You may have accommodated or adapted to something that is not what you really want
There is an important factor to take into account which is the social and/or cultural factor. What they socially make us understand is happiness and the things we need to achieve it, such as being in a relationship, or creating a family, buying a house, or having a lot of money… In this sense, There are already many studies that conclude that money does not buy happiness
The journal ‘Social psychological and personality science’ concluded that having access to a greater amount of income is associated with experiencing less sadness on a daily basis, so the results showed that money can be an effective tool to reduce sadness. , but not to improve happiness.
3. Self-esteem
From a very young age, they emphasize mistakes, how to improve or even compare ourselves with others. This leads to an internal dialogue being generated in us that makes us be very hard on ourselves and in the end our self-esteem suffers and that cannot be solved with material things.
4. A lot of stress and little rest
Life goes very fast, we are used to going quickly, assuming many responsibilities and resting little due to lack of time, personal circumstances, worries… This causes us to normalize very high stress levels and unconsciously take their toll despite having everything
5. You act out of inertia
Sometimes there comes a time when you turn on autopilot, you operate out of inertia, routine, or what others want or expect you to do. You stop having control of your life, your dreams fade away and you lose control of your life. If you are in this situation, it is important not to feel fear or guilt and start working to feel better about yourself.
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This article has been reviewed by our editorial team at PsychologyFor to ensure accuracy, clarity, and adherence to evidence-based research. The content is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice.
