“I feel excluded by everyone”, “no one likes my company”, “everyone distances themselves from me and I don’t understand why they do it”, are phrases that express a lot of loneliness and, above all, pain. People are social beings by nature, we like to feel accepted and recognized, so when the opposite happens and we feel rejected, that we are not part of a group or community, we are invaded by great sadness caused by the feeling of loneliness. If you are a person who constantly feels rejected and you ask yourself over and over again: “why do I feel like people reject me?”, it is because you would like to understand what is happening and, above all, find that answer that you have been missing for so long. be able to respond.
That is why in this PsychologyFor article: “why do I feel like people reject me ”, we are going to explain to you in a simple and detailed way the reasons why this may be happening to you, as well as give you some advice that can help you.
I notice that people reject me: 5 considerations and questions
Before answering your question: why do I feel like people reject me?, it is important that you reflect more deeply on your situation. To do this, you can take into account this series of considerations that you could be overlooking. Feeling rejected by others is not a pleasant feeling and we must work to manage it in the best way possible.
In what situations do you feel rejected? Define the specific situations that make you feel rejected by others. It may be, for example, that with your lifelong friends you feel very well accepted and/or with your family, however at work the opposite or the other way around happens to you. You have to identify which are the situations in which you feel that people reject you the most.
Do all people reject you? On most occasions we tend to generalize and say that everyone is like this, something like this happens to us all the time, etc. However, it is almost impossible for this to happen. Surely there are people who are not rejecting you, however, by focusing on those who do, you stop paying attention to them.
What kind of people reject you? Think carefully about the type of people by whom you feel rejected, do they have some characteristics in common? Are they close people or are they not? Are they authority figures? Try to classify the type of people by that you generally feel rejected.
Do you reject them too? Sometimes when we feel rejected by one or more people, we tend to act more distant and even do the same with them. It may be that you don’t like the type of people you feel rejected by and that they themselves also perceive that about you.
Do you have any idea why this is happening? If you wonder why people reject you but you have in mind some of the possible reasons, either because you have realized it yourself or because other people have told you, it is important that you analyze them objectively and try to Realize how real they are and if they are, ask yourself what you can do to improve it.
Reasons why you feel rejected
Have nothing in common with those people. It may be that you are within a social group, work group, family group, etc. where their values, their personality and their way of thinking have absolutely nothing to do with yours, so you have the constant feeling of not fitting in.
Having excessively servile behavior towards others. Contrary to what might be expected, a person who is always looking out for others first, tries to be kind but falls into exaggeration, always agrees with the opinions of others and never makes his own known, tries to always please everyone, sacrifices for others, etc. In the end it ends up being rejected. This is because it gives the impression of always needing the approval of others, it does not realize its worth and therefore reflects a lack of love and self-acceptance, people do not usually value and even reject people who constantly seek their acceptance and they do not really show themselves as they are, therefore it seems that they do not have their own personality.
Have excessively rude behavior. There are people to whom the opposite can happen and they behave rudely and disrespectfully towards others. It may be because of what they say or the way in which they say things, which causes people to distance themselves.
Behaving distant with others. People who use as a defense mechanism, because closeness to others generates anxiety and fear, opting for distant behavior. And it is not that they do not want to have a closer relationship with others and make new friends, for example, but their desire is equal to their fear of generating that closer relationship, which is why they consciously or unconsciously distance themselves from others. Other people, noticing this, over time lose interest in the person who behaved from a distant beginning and therefore end up rejecting her.
Wanting to join a very closed social group. There are people who form small social groups, it can be at school, work, etc. who are not interested in getting to know someone else, feel that those they are with are enough and reject anyone who tries to integrate, sometimes even unconsciously.
Tips to overcome rejection
Reflect on why you are feeling rejected and put an action plan in place. To do this, you can take into account the 5 considerations mentioned above and the 5 possible reasons why you are being rejected. Once you get a clearer and more specific answer, try to be generous with yourself and above all objective and start finding possible solutions that can help you. For example, if you have realized that you feel rejected at work because you behave distantly towards others, you can make an effort to be more interested in those people, ask them how they are doing, hang out more with them, etc.
Don’t take everything personally. Keep in mind that there will always be people who are not very tolerant who will not accept those who do not think like them, who have unresolved situations in their past and who may dislike you because some attitude of yours reminds them of something negative about them. that they simply have a bad character and do not feel like socializing, etc. So if they reject you for no apparent reason, do not identify yourself and give it the importance it deserves, which in this case is none.
Be yourself. People are attracted to people who expose their own personality without fear of rejection or other people’s opinions. Realize that the most authentic people are the ones we like to live with the most. Don’t be afraid to be yourself, try to contribute the best of yourself to others and never do things just to please others.
It is impossible for everyone to like you. Always remember that it is impossible for all people to like us, so we have to accept that we are going to receive rejection from many, acceptance from others, with others we will go unnoticed, we will attract the attention of a few, etc. That’s perfectly normal, the abnormal thing would be for everyone to like you.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
If you want to read more articles similar to Why do I feel like people reject me? we recommend that you enter our Personal Growth and Self-Help category.
