In a simple way, we can define conflict as the fact of having different opinions or having some type of disagreement between two or more parties. The important thing about conflicts is not to avoid them, but to be able to resolve them in the most effective way possible
Many times we try to change the other party’s mind, explaining why we are right and they are wrong. In reality, this is not having an adequate conflict resolution approach, in fact, this strategy may not resolve the conflict, only worsen it.
The same thing happens when instead of facing the conflict, we avoid it and act as if it did not exist.
In this article I share with you 6 conflict resolution strategies or tips that I consider to be effective
1. Clarify what the source of the conflict is
A good starting point to resolve a conflict is to be clear about its origin. Defining the cause of the conflict gives us the opportunity to understand how the problem arose and what the solutions to that problem may be. Furthermore, clarifying the source of the conflict allows us to reach a consensus between the two parties to determine what the disagreement is.
It is of utmost importance that both parties have the problem clearly identified At this point it is important that we obtain as much information as possible about the views, opinions and needs of each person involved in the conflict. Asking open-ended questions is a great way to get that valuable information.
2. Make use of active listening
Active listening is a very effective strategy when resolving conflicts.
Provide feedback to the other party, show that you are listening and avoid judgments In this way, the other person will feel heard, taken into account and will have been able to express their thoughts and concerns. I also recommend that you validate their emotions with phrases like these: I understand that what you are saying has caused you discomfort or what you are saying is understandable. This whole listening part is very important and puts us in a better position to reach an agreement.
3. Use the first person to talk about your emotions and opinions
Using the first person is one of the cornerstones of conflict resolution. This way We will avoid blaming and take responsibility for our emotions, actions and thoughts
Let’s see it with an example. When someone is late for a meeting we can say: Why are you late? I had asked you for maximum punctuality. However, if we speak from our own emotions we could say: I felt very frustrated for not starting the meeting at the agreed time, for me it was very important. When we are working on conflict resolution, taking charge of our emotions can make a big difference. This will prevent others from becoming defensive.
This technique is also called brainstorming or brainstorming. Brainstorming is a tool that is widely used in groups and that allows new, innovative and creative ideas to emerge on many occasions It consists of people throwing ideas without much filter or without much sense. Eliminating judgment is very important. Then in a later step, the ideas will be filtered and refined. And, of course, those that are not viable will be eliminated. Exploring all possible ideas as a group for a mutually favorable result can make ideas appear that we would not have thought of individually. In addition, it encourages the participation of all people involved.
5. Find a middle path
The greatest conflicts arise when a solution satisfactory to all parties is not found. Therefore, it will be necessary for the parties involved to think of a middle path in which both parties give up something.
Actually, if you think about it, this leads to a kind of outcome where both sides lose. At this point it is important to recognize the effort made and leave space for mourning. It is also important to say that these types of solutions can be proposed as something temporary, which will be modified as soon as there is an alternative in which neither party has to give up anything
6. Follow up
I think it is important to follow up to see if the agreed strategies are working as all parties expected. This follow-up can be done through another meeting, an email, a call, etc. This will give us the opportunity to ensure that neither party loses its way and will allow us to detect problems and areas for improvement.
