How Can I Improve My Relationship With My Parents? 6 Tips
The family is a context of relationships in which it is normally easy for happy moments to occur, but cases of people who believe that their relationship with other family members can be improved are also common. Although arguments between siblings are a constant in certain homes where there are children, it is the relationship with parents that is most likely to leave problems entrenched for years.
How can I improve my relationship with my parents? This is what is asked by those who, due to differences, past conflicts or misunderstandings of all kinds, see how time passes and this emotional bond does not give as much as it should.
In this article we will see some tips to know how to improve the relationship with fathers and mothers, and how these guidelines can be applied according to several examples.
The steps to follow that you will find below are general guidelines that work in many cases, although each family is unique and you have to know how to adapt them to what you experience on a daily basis.
1. Create expectations of good behavior
One of the mechanisms that facilitate the improvement of a relationship It has to do with openly showing that our perception of a person is good or, if we already knew them, that they have changed for the better. In this way, the other sees a positive reflection of his identity, and seeks not to miss that opportunity to continue enjoying a good image.
For example, we can thank a father or mother for a favor they have done for us, and do so with an emphasis that shows we especially appreciate what you have done for us. It is good to stop and think and recognize your effort invested in actions that benefit us and that, out of habit, we often take for granted.
This strategy may seem banal, but with this simple strategy, repeated several times, you can give that small boost necessary for the relationship to improve, especially in those cases in which the relational problems were maintained by the inertia of believing oneself to be despised. by the other person.
2. Dedicate time to them
To improve a relationship with parents, it is always necessary to spend more time with them. These moments will help to know their points of view, to give them the opportunity to break our expectations about what we believe are their tastes and opinions, and of course, express affection.
For example, you can go from eating each person at their own time to doing it together, or spending Sunday mornings taking a walk, etc.
3. Remember happy moments together
This is one of the easiest steps to improve the relationship with parents, since it simply involves remember together and out loud, as if creating a narrative from memories, in a collaborative way. In this way, the experience lived in the present is linked (sharing a moment with a father, a mother or both) and the positive emotions that those experiences produced.
In addition, it is possible to know facets of what happened in those times that were unknown then, which allows us to deepen the relationship.
In most cases, parents not only give us life; They also raise us and They educate us to become functional adults, with the ability to make achievements of various kinds. Therefore, it is good to make it clear that we are aware of that.
For example, if our professional career was driven by university studies partially paid for by them, this fact can be highlighted in a situation in which we are congratulated for an achieved career goal.
5. Do your part in conversations
It is very common that part of the family conflicts between parents and children has to do with the impatience of the youngest ones when their parents become interested in their lives. For this reason, some dialogues seem more like interrogations, since the parents ask questions, and the children respond as briefly as possible.
This is just a sign that you have to invest more efforts in establishing enriching dialogues, instead of simply enduring them as if they were torture. You can also ask them to, from there, make the words emerge in a more spontaneous way.
6. Be patient
Parents too They have a lot to learn from their children, and this is something we often don’t count on. By assuming that they are adults, it is tempting to think that with little effort they can learn basic everyday things just as we have done, especially related to new technologies. But the truth is that the context in which our fathers and mothers grew up bears little resemblance to ours, and at a certain point it is more difficult to keep up to date with the latest trends in lifestyle.
So, prepare yourself: They’re going to ask a lot of questions about what certain neologisms mean, they’re going to ask you for help on the phone or the computer, and you may have to repeat it several times. None of this should exhaust your patience, since as frustrating as this may seem, it makes sense that it is more difficult for them to enter these worlds of the new.
