How To Trust Your Partner If They Have Lied To You

You may be afraid that this situation will happen again in the future, you may be constantly on the lookout for what will happen next, and you may be experiencing some discomfort and resentment, which to some extent is normal for you to experience. especially when this situation is recent. But if you have freely decided to give it another chance, time has passed and you are still wondering “How to trust your partner if he or she has lied to you” , you will begin to feel worse and worse, not only in the relationship but also individually. So more than giving your partner the opportunity to correct his mistake and rescue the relationship, it is necessary that you truly give yourself another opportunity to trust again and put aside that discomfort that doesn’t let you live in peace now. Some of the things that you should be clear about once you have made the decision to trust again are the following:

Trusting again is a process

Keep in mind that it is impossible for you to trust again a person who has lied to you overnight. A person earns our trust over time through his actions and when this is lost, in order for him to regain it, he must start a process again to earn it again. To do this, you must be patient and don’t despair since the more time passes and the more experiences you have with your partner that generate security, the more comfortable you will feel and without you realizing it, your trust in your partner will return.

Keep in mind that you decided to forgive your partner

Remember that if you decided forgive your partner for lies It’s because you surely have enough reasons to have done so. Probably, you have the conviction that that relationship is worth preserving and that this person is worthy of deserving a new opportunity. Focus on it and make it motivate you to be calm and trust your partner again.

A new opportunity to continue growing

Learn to perceive this situation as something more positive and stop visualizing only the negative , since if you continue doing it you will feel worse and worse and it will be impossible for you to trust again. Having gone through a difficult situation and trying to re-foster and build trust in the relationship is another experience of knowledge and growth, not only as a couple but also individually.

Focus on the present

The discomfort you feel is a product of constantly remembering things from the past, so even if you feel fine in the present and things have improved, if your mind continues to constantly travel in time, you will not be able to experience the well-being of today. So whenever you are experiencing emotional discomfort, pause and notice where it is coming from, is it really coming from the present or is it coming from the past? And redirect your attention to what is happening in the here and now A tool that can help you a lot to achieve this is the practice of meditation.

Stop waiting for your partner to lie to you again

If you are constantly on the lookout for when you are going to receive another deception, you will never be able to rest assured. It is necessary that just as you have been training your mind to catch your partner lying to you again, you train it to stop doing so. How to achieve it? Every time you catch yourself spying on your partner, paying attention to what he or she is doing, etc., distract your mind on something else listen to music, read, go for a walk or simply continue with what you are doing, paying full attention to it, accepting that you had that thought, but without giving it so much importance.

Accept uncertainty

You have to accept that really before your partner lied to you and with all the partners you have had and/or could have later, you can never be completely sure that they are not lying to you. That’s a risk that has to be taken with all types of intimate relationships and no one is safe from it. However. It’s a risk totally worth taking. since it is possible to be happy and feel comfortable in a relationship despite that.

Couple therapy

If you have tried by all or almost all means, but you still don’t know how to trust your partner if they have lied to you, one option that you can take into account is that Attend therapy together It must be taken into account that depending on the situation and circumstances, on many occasions. Trusting your partner again becomes quite complicated, however. With the help of a professional and enough desire to move the relationship forward, it can be achieved.

Don’t leave everything in the hands of your partner

In order for your partner to earn your trust again, it is necessary that You also do your part If you dedicate yourself to waiting and depending on what the other person does for you, you will not be able to be at peace with yourself. Recognize what you can do to increase trust between the two of you and do that too. When your partner feels that it is equitable and that you are also contributing, they will feel more motivated to do better.

Don’t continually reproach your partner

Remember that not only you may be having a hard time, the person who has lied may be carrying the guilt of having done so, as well as trying to do the best they can to make up for their mistake. When reproaches appear, the situation can become even more complicated and the guilt that the other person may be feeling, especially if they have not been able to forgive themselves, can lead to them acting in ways they do not want, increasing their frustration and helplessness. Although on many occasions you almost feel the need to reproach him for things from the past, do everything possible so that these reproaches become requests and suggestions What could you do to improve in the present.

In the following article, you can see other tips on how to nourish love in a couple.

This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.

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